


Cherub Institute

by Hiddenhikari



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Humanstuck, M/M, Mental Illness, Multi, asylumstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-21
Updated: 2016-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-15 16:47:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 21
Words: 47,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/851779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hiddenhikari/pseuds/Hiddenhikari
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>*5/10/16 FINISHED!*<br/>Based on the asylumstuck AU, more information in the 'disclaimer' first chapter - warnings: ships (any and all - there will be no smut but its gonna get toasty), gore/blood, drug use, mental illnesses, cussing. Possible triggers such as rape, suicidal thoughts, self harm, drug use, and possibly more - please read disclaimer page for more info. </p><p>The Cherub Institute is a large building home to various children with various mental health problems. The past is unknown and the future is quite uncertain. And yet, the third floor remains the biggest question of all.</p><p>*Written by a mentally ill author who has been within these types of hospitals multiple times and done first person research/interviews on the different illnesses portrayed. Asylumstuck is mine to reclaim as a neurodivergent writer suffering from multiple illnesses portrayed in the fic. If you have a genuine concern about something that you know from personal experience was written wrong, please contact me PRIVATELY about it. You can find links to where you may do that in my bio. I highly recommend waiting til the end before critiquing anything about the plot. I promise it will all make sense when its finished!*</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Disclaimer - updated 4/24/16

_ **((This has been edited since its first post))** _

_ **(some of this is important, please read!!!)** _

Author's note: This is a Homestuck AU that I realize may be somewhat over done, and I realize there is already theories about what certain characters disorders would be, their appearance, and names. This, however, is a completely separate fanfic from all of those. I am in no way trying to copy anything written about this AU prior to this, I am not trying to change or alter it whatsoever, consider this fanfic a completely separate AU...like an AU of the AU, if you will? Also, I will be writing this is my own writing style and not trying to mimic the way Homestuck itself is written. This will not be in POV's, it will be from an omniscient narrator with no contribution to the story whatsoever, there will be no use of the arrow mark or any other writing quirks usually accompanied with HS.

If you feel like something I am writing is out of character, generally just badly written, you spot a grammatical error, or you really like it, drop me a review and lay it on me. *Real* criticism is always accepted here! **But please keep in mind before leaving a critique that has anything to do with hospital life or the disorders:** A lot of this may seem like I am portraying a disorder with very little knowledge of the illness, cliched, or even straight out of a movie – there is a reason for this. Some things will make no sense – again, this is on purpose! If you find yourself reading a scene and thinking "That's now how that really works at all!" then yes, it was probably written that way on purpose and will all make sense in time! Also, this is not glorifying mental disorders in anyway whatsoever and I am not saying if you suffer from one of these disorders that you belong in a hospital. I, personally, have been in hospitals a dozen times and suffer from a cocktail of mental health issues. I am not obligated to explain exactly what disorders I am diagnosed with but I will say I have sever things other than anxiety/depression.

Also, I really like the people who read my stuff, so I'll probably have really useless author's notes at the beginning and/or end of each chapter. Feel free to ignore them unless I **bold** something, that's probably really important or its a trigger warning or something... Speaking of trigger warnings, this is set in a mental institution so there will be triggers. Disorders such as PTSD will be discussed with a history of rape or abuse, there will be one with major depressive disorder, ect ect.

Now, on a less stressful note, there will be ships in this, pirates will sail them and steal your booty. No, honestly, I do pair a lot in HS but just because I make one ship canon does NOT mean you should quit reading, because at one point or another, this fic will hint toward pretty much every single pairing possible...okay, that's a stretch, _most_ pairings possible...okay a lot at least! I try my best at keeping everyone in character but if I'm writing someone WAY out of character...let me know immediately! There is nothing I despise more than reading a fic with everyone OOC...but keep in mind: I will not change the character just to fit your headcanon, so just because you 'think' a certain person should act a certain way is not grounds to judge me on how I write said character.

If you have questions, comments, or concerns leave me a review or drop me a message. Thank you for taking the time to read my long, drabbling author's note. Most of my others will be short and sweet, I just had to make sure I got everything out in the open for this one. If you decide not to read my fic for whatever reason, thank you for at least taking the time to click the little link and whatnot!

And if you recognize me from my previous works on fanfic.net (hiddenhikari on there as well I think), please keep in mind it has been a few years since I wrote those and I would like to believe my writing has improved.

Finally, this fic is under going heavy editing currently that will change big pieces of the story. I recommend for old readers to to go back and read chapters that contain "updated (date)" otherwise chapters added after the updates are done will not make any sense.


	2. Prologue - updated 4/24/16

There were quiet whispers at the end of the hall. A young boy silently padded his way to an ajar door, light filtering out to sprinkle the hallway. He crept against the wall and laid his ear against the open door and listened. His mother's voice, soft and full of worry, could barely be heard against the low rumble of his father's angry tone. "I'm just worried about him..." She was nearly a whisper as she breathed out against his chest. The man laid a hand on the back of her head, holding her close.

"I'm promising you this: it's a phase. Mark my words. In a few weeks he will get tired of all these people infiltrating his life and he'll give up this big charade. That's all it is, a game." The man held her shoulders and looked her deep in the eyes. What he spoke, he absolutely believed, but no matter how many times he said it his wife, she just couldn't accept it. She believed their son. She believed every word he said. From the first time they were called to his school because he had passed out in the bathroom to just earlier that day he had gotten caught with a knife at school, every explanation, she believed wholeheartedly.

The doctors questioned him as well as his parents multiple times about his childhood, searching for any reason for his psyche to have fractured the way had. No matter what happened, he always persisted that these things he did, they weren't always him. He would exclaim, "It was Calliope's idea, Mom!" And his mom would believe it, just as a good mother should. With tears in her son's eyes, she would embrace him even while his father turned his back. Sometimes, he would run to her, dressed in girl's clothing, make up covering his face and he would squeal in a voice not of his own, "Mommy, will you tie the bow in the back for me?"

His mother would smile down at him and happily reply, "Of course, Calliope, my darling daughter." With a smile, she accepted her son, even during his claims of being a girl named Calliope.

Caliborn took a deep breath and pushed the door in front of him open and his parents turned to look at him. "Callio-"

"- _born._ Address our son by his real name...you cannot feed into this sickness more than you already have. If you keep calling him that name, he'll just believe it's true..." Caliborn's father interrupted his mother and shot her an angry glare.

"It...it's okay, mom. I am Caliborn...right now, anyway." Caliborn shifted his attention to his father, hatred lighting up his eyes. "You think I'm a liar? An attention seeking liar, is that it? You know damn well that if all I wanted was attention, I would've given this up years ago. I've gotten all the attention I need - this isn't just some joke. This is real...whether you fucking like it or not..."

That night happened years and years ago. Caliborn got older, he worked things out with his other side, they still had their disagreements about what the body should do, but for the most part, it wasn't a struggle just to get through the day anymore. As he got older, his mother tired of dealing with him, his father died still thinking of his son as a liar till the day they put him in the ground. Soon after, his mother, his only advocate, even if it was only slight now in her old age, followed her husband.

Caliborn, alone in the world with no one but Calliope, his sister as he called her, began to work on a project with the money their parents had left behind. They wanted to create a hospital, for other children growing up with something wrong with them, something that kept them from functioning. Especially for those who didn't have a strong family support at home. It was a free institution with no goal to make money and running entirely off charity support and donations. The Cherub Institute was a last hope, a safe haven, if you will, for those with no where else to turn.


	3. John's Arrival - updated 4/24/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first patient to enter the hospital - John Egbert - is a boy suffering from a case of severe anxiety and avoidant personality disorder, but he's putting his heart into the Cherub Institute to help him.

 A young boy and his father arrive at a large building. The windows are covered by beautiful white curtains, a tall white fence surrounds the perimeter of the land and a garden of vines and flowers slowly crawling up the side of the building and spreading to the grass on either side of the door. The man in the drivers seat turned to his son, "Are you sure this is what you want?" The boy nodded. "Other hospitals have never helped, what makes you think this place is different?" The boy shrugged and looked down at his feet that fiddled with one another anxiously against the floor board. The man parked the car and went around to open the door for his son. The boy climbed out and they moved to the back of the vehicle to remove his luggage.

The boy wasn't sure how long he would stay there. It could be as short as only a month, but who knew what the longest would be. The doctors decided when he got to leave. They took the bags, the father with two bags, the son with a pillow in one hand and a suitcase in the other, and headed to the front door.

The father pushed a button and they heard a click. They tugged on the door and it opened smoothly. The man held the door for his son who slowly navigated his way through the door and stood against a wall to wait for his father. The two found themselves in what looked to be a regular hospital waiting room. Chairs, a desk with a glass window, a small, muted TV displaying subtitles, and even a small pile of blocks and coloring books sat alone in the corner of the room for younger children. The hospital seemed new, there were few cars outside and he couldn't hear anyone aside from the sound of his father tapping his foot in impatience.There was no one at the front desk so they took their seats, the father watching the news broadcast quietly, the son anxiously pulling feathers from his pillow.

Eventually, a woman entered the room from behind the desk, she was pale and thin and wore the stereotypical white nurses dress. Her voice was monotone when she spoke, but her eyes looked a little more excited than she sounded, "Can I help you?" She called to the boy's father who in turned stood and walked to the desk. The young boy watched nervously as the two spoke quietly, his father signed a few papers, and then the woman pushed a button. Moments later, a man entered the room. He wore black slacks and yellow scrub top that was made to look like it was made from caution tape. "He will take you back." The woman behind the desk called, gesturing to the newly arrived man.

The father made his way back to his son and bent down on one knee so he was eye-level with him, "You be good, okay? I'm sure once you've been here long enough, things can go back to the way they used to be, right...?" The boy slowly nodded his head. The man wrapped his arms around the boy and mumbled into his ear, "I love you, John, I'll see you soon."

John felt himself begin to tear up, lifting his arms to hug his dad back. "I love you, too, Dad." He whispered back before his dad stood up, handed the bags to the man with scrubs, and tilted his hat to his son, and walked out the door.

John stood up, gathered his pillow and suitcase, and followed the man through a different door and into a hallway. It wasn't like the other hospitals he had been in, the hall wasn't a boring white or beige, it had color. Even if it was just an ugly floral wallpaper, it was better than nothing. He followed the man down the hallway, taking sharp turns here and there and passing a few hallways leading to what looked like classrooms and a cafeteria. The entire time, they didn't pass a single other patient. "Excuse me..." John said quietly, poking the man ahead of him in the arm, "...but, where are the other patients? Surely I'm not the only one, right?"

Without looking back, the man answered, "No, you are right, you are the only one. This hospital has only been open for a few weeks now and you are our first patient."

"O-oh...wow." John looked down at his feet as he followed, silent the rest of the way.

When the two finally arrived at the day room, John could now clearly tell how new the hospital was. The tables were all in order, the chairs clean, the rug spotless, and the boundary tape that surrounded the nurse's station was still completely in tact. _Does this mean I get to choose the TV channel?_  John wondered to himself as he stared around the room. Every other hospital he had been in had been filled with other patients, at least 10 others just in the child ward alone. Now that he thought about it, he didn't remember passing through an adult ward or even seeing any patient rooms. He knew the building was two or three stories tall, maybe that was up stairs? He started to ask the 'caution tape man,' as he had decided to refer to him as, about if this was true, but the man was turning and walking back out the door. John looked around the room, confused as to why he was being left alone before he noticed a nurse sitting at a desk in the back. He walked up to the man who was wearing white scrub pants and a bright, neon green shirt. "So...what do I do all day? What are the rules and junk...?"

The man looked up from his magazine and looked genuinely startled, "Oh, I wasn't even aware someone was here!" He stood up and moved out from behind the desk and extended a hand to John, "You can call me Nurse Scratch, the others will be back in a little bit."

John smiled, realizing the man was friendlier than he thought, "I-I'm John," he introduced himself quietly as he studied the man. He had very light blonde hair, almost white, and pale complexion. He was also rather short, not more than a couple inches taller than John himself.

"Well, I guess since I am the only one here, I'll do your intake. Since you're our first patient, this will be the first intake I've done, so be patient with me alright? Although, I am sure I'll be wonderful at it." Nurse Scratch gave a slight wink at John as he took his seat again and pulled out a notebook. He began reading the rules to him, normal stuff such as 'do not give out personal information like your last name or phone number' and 'no touching other patients,' although, most of that was useless seeing as how he was the only patient. Nurse Scratch turned his attention from the book to John, "So, what exactly are you here for?"

John fidgeted as he stood in front of the man, unsure if his problem was really a big enough deal for him to even be in such an institute. "I...have been in hospitals before...they say I have a bad anxiety disorder? S-sometimes I have panic attacks...and um I've never been diagnosed with it but...uh...have you ever heard of AVPD? Its a...personality disorder..." he took a deep breath, trying to keep his voice from shaking, "I know I'm not 18 but I just really think it could be-"

Nurse Scratch shh'ed him, "I understand. I'll take note of that and pass it along to your therapist." He gave a smile, "So, the final step of your intake before I take you to put your stuff away in your room, can you contract for safety? Or, can you promise you will not hurt yourself or others during your stay at the Cherub Institute?"

John nodded his head, "Yeah, I guess."

The nurse smiled, "Okay, now we'll preform the strip search and you will be on your w-"

"Strip search!?" John exclaimed, his eyes widening.

"Oh, calm down. It isn't that big of a deal, we just need to make sure you haven't brought any items we do not allow into the hospital. I wont even look at you, I just need to check the clothes you are wearing." Nurse Scratch assured him as he lead the way into a small office and handed John a hospital gown. "Just change into this and give me your clothes, once they're checked you can put them back on."

John awkwardly agreed, as if he wasn't nervous enough about this whole ordeal now he had to get naked in front of a man he just met? He had been in hospitals before and had to do this plenty of times, but it was just strange this time. Maybe it was because he was the only patient in the building, maybe it was just because he got a weird vibe from this guy? He wasn't sure, but finally he pulled off his clothing, slipped on the gown, and tossed his clothing at the man. A few moments later, they were handed back to him, neatly folded in a stack. John traded the stack for the gown and tugged his clothing back on, finally allowing the redness covering his face to decrease.

Nurse Scratch smiled, "Well, let's go on to your room now." He lead John out of the office and to a set of stairs. They climbed up the stairs, John's bags in tow, and arrived at a hallway filled with doors. "This is where the patient rooms are. You get first pick." Nurse Scratch gave a wink as he started down the hall.

John looked up the set of stairs that continued up for another story, "What's up there?" He asked, staring up them but all he could see was a door that blocked his view onto the next floor.

Nurse Scratch escorted him away from the stairs and down the hall, "You won't be going up there."

"Why?" John asked, "Is that the adult ward?"

Nurse Scratch bit his lip, "I...guess you could say that. Come now, choose your room. They're all the same basically, so it doesn't matter much."

John shrugged away the thoughts of how he 'guessed you say that' was the adult ward, was it or wasn't it? Come on now, don't play games. He turned into the first room he saw. The walls had pink wallpaper and it smelled fruity, he started to lay his things on the bed when Nurse Scratch placed a hand on his shoulder, "You should probably take a room on the other side of the hall. These are the girl rooms."

"Oh." John picked up his things again and walked across the hall. This room was set up exactly the same, but it had green wallpaper and smelled...not fruity. He felt like the distinction between the boys rooms and girls rooms was unnecessary at the least but decided it wasn't worth voicing his thoughts about. Nurse Scratch opened up one of the two cabinets and told John that's where his clothes would go. John started to unpack his clothing and shove them into the cabinet wherever they would fit, Nurse Scratch pulling them out, folding them neatly, and setting them back down. When all the bags were empty, he tossed his pillow onto the cabinet's respective bed and turned to Nurse Scratch. "Now what?"

"Well, seeing as how you are our first patient...I'm not quite sure what we do now...let's head back to the day room and see if the others are back." The blonde man turned away and started back down the hall. John eyed up the staircase again at the third floor, not quite being able to get it off his mind. What _exactly_ was up there? A torture chamber? Electro-shock therapy? Dead bodies? He just couldn't be for sure. He followed the man down the stairs back to the room with tables and desks again. There were three men standing there in green scrub pants.

"John, these are more of the nurses, Itchy, Doze, and Trace." Nurse Scratch introduced him to a man in a yellow scrub top, a man in a blue scrub top, and a man in a red scrub top, respectively.

John nodded at all three, "Uh...interesting names..." He commented quietly.

Nurse Doze smiled at him, "Those are just our nicknames, son. We aren't allowed to give out our real names so that way you can't try to find us outside of the hospital."

"Oh."

"John here is our first patient, so we should treat him well and keep him out of trouble. Do you want some candy?" Nurse Scratch offered him a small bowl of what looked like licorice in the shape of dogs. John said he would pass.

"So...like I asked before...what exactly do we do now?" John had a hard time making eye contact with any of the four men. Not because he didn't trust them, just because he didn't know them. This was how he always was when he met new people: deathly shy.

Nurse Itchy stepped forward and placed a hand gently on John's shoulder, "We'll go on to the class room and get all your school work together for now, you can get started with therapy tomorrow, follow me." He smiled down at the boy, and somehow the man made John feel a little less scared. He looked around the room of nurses, slowly taking a glance at their eyes. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all?

* * *

A/N: Fun fact: the lady who works at the front desk is Windswept Questriant.


	4. Rose's Arrival - updated 4/25/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our next patient - Rose Lalonde - is absolutely, completely perfect.

John looked up from his coloring page at the sound of a car pulling up out front. He had been in the hospital for two and half weeks now and he was still the only patient. For a moment, his heart started to beat really quickly, was this his dad coming for a family session for the first time? His heart sunk for a moment, or it could be time for him to go home... His anxiety had decreased since being in the hospital, but his psychologist, Dr. Hearts, said it was most likely because he wasn't around his 'triggers.'

John wasn't even sure what his 'triggers' were but his doctor and his therapist, who strangely went by the name of "Eggs" and was a small, awfully ecstatic man who, in John's opinion, deserved to be hospitalized far more than he did, both agreed his father's nonacceptance of his anxiety disorder merely triggered the issue to worsen. He was afraid to go home before everything was completely under control. He still had a lot more to do with his medicine and different coping techniques. Sighing, and a bit frightened to see his father's car, he made his way to the large window that shown over the small garden on the side of the building. If you went as far to one side as possible and strained to look, you could barely make out the car in the front of the building. It wasn't his father's.

It was a cop car. A man got out of the passenger's seat, he wore a suit and tie and a fine black hat. John thought he had seen him speaking to Dr. Hearts a few times, but couldn't be sure. The man opened up the back of the cop car and a girl got out. She had short, chin length blonde hair with a black head band. She wore a white shirt with a purple book and a white skirt. She looked like she had a permanently disappointed look on her face, _but she might just be in a bad mood_ , John thought.

* * *

"Rose...I know you don't like this...but it is only until you're mother can get her own life straitened out." The suited man said seriously, closing the door behind her.

Rose scoffed and folded her arms, walking ahead of him, "Come _on_ , Dr. Spades, you know just as well as I do that my mother isn't some sort of drunk! She can take care of me just fine...this really isn't necessary. I was getting my disorder under control and now...what if this only makes it worse?" She turned to him, throwing her hands out in anger and frustration.

Dr. Spades took a deep breath as he waved good bye to the cop who dropped them off and then drove away. He walked her up to the front door and opened it, holding the door for her. Rose pushed through it without thanking him, "I know you think you know you're mother...but in all honesty, Rose, you really don't."

"Oh and I'm supposed to believe _you_ do?"

Dr. Spades pinched the bridge of his nose, "I know her better than you could ever understand...but that isn't important." He escorted her into the hospital, the woman at the front desk nodded at them as they passed by, all of her paperwork had been completed before she even showed up. "You will be staying here until the court can decide what to do with you."

Rose scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"If you're mother chooses to go to rehab, like I suggested to her, then you will get to go back with her as soon as she is out and well. If not, you will be under the hospitals care until...you are adopted."

"ADOPTED!?" Rose all but screamed as she stopped in the middle of the hallway, "You...you can't just make her give me up!"

The man took a deep breath and let it out, "She won't be giving you up. We will take you away with force because that is what's best for you."

Rose grumbled and fussed as she stomped down the hall and waited at a large set of double doors. "Please, just...just leave me alone." The doctor nodded as he opened the door and showed her to her room, her bags were already there and waiting on her. He tipped his hat once before leaving her alone in her room.

Rose sat on her bed, pulling her knees up to her chest and resting her face on them. "Mom..." She whispered quietly as she felt her eyes well up before biting her lip, sitting up straight, and batting the tears away. "No. I'm not gonna sit in here and cry about this. I'm gonna get better so...so it doesn't even matter if my mom drinks sometimes. They can't play the whole 'she's not taking care of your disorder' card if I don't have one anymore!"

She felt more determined than ever as she stood up from her bed and stalked out of her room, closing it behind her. The nurses looked up as she entered the day room. She smiled politely at them and they looked back down at their respective activities and let her go about whatever she was doing. She found a bookshelf and began to read the spines of them but found there were only three or four she had never read.

Rose was a bibliomanic, meaning she had an obsession with books. She was more than just an avid reader, she collected them and hoarded them to the point that one day a stack crashed down on her. Her mother got her set up with a therapist, just to see if they could stop her hoarding, because of course, loving books was not a bad thing, but when you almost died because of that love, people tend to worry. She told her therapist that she loved to read because it was the only thing that made her feel alive. For some reason, this worried the man.

He deduced that her obsession with books stemmed from a personality disorder that often involved hoarding tendencies: obsessive-compulsive personality disorder. He explained to her that this meant a lot of the ways she interpreted herself and the world around her were skewed with the thoughts that only a perfectionist experiences. Rose spoke for the first time about her need to contribute to society and suicidal thoughts that accompany small failures. She had never thought of herself as a perfectionist or thought that her ideas were unhealthy, she just thought they made her more productive than others.

Rose promised her therapist she wouldn't hurt herself and she was allowed to return home, under the watchful eye of her mother. Then, one day her case manager came for a home visit. Rose's mother wasn't home. She explained her mom was on a business trip and had left a couple days ago and would be home that weekend. The man explained that wasn't okay. He said that Rose was too young to be alone for that amount of time especially when her mother knew her mental state was fragile. The case manager agreed to come back to Rose's house until her mother returned and when she did, they were both surprised to see her stumble through the door, reeking of alcohol. He deemed it an 'unfit household' for someone of Rose's mental standings to live in. Authorities showed up and decided that it would be for the best for Rose to go somewhere safe until it could be decided if she would be allowed to live with her mother.

Rose and her mother were both shocked by what was happening and equally confused about if what was happening was even legal or the correct thing to do for the situation. They really had no clue about any of it, so they did as they were told. Rose went with a doctor that worked at the local hospital and Rose's mother went with the police.

* * *

John watched the new girl exit from her room and look around the commons, examining the bookshelf. She picked one out and sat down on the couch and fell completely silent as she read. He left his spot at the window and inched closer to her. She had appeared rather angry when she first entered but by now she had seemingly calmed down. He took a deep breath and readied a hello but he fell silent and slunk away, his heart beating too fast. _Its okay! She's just another person. And if shes here then...she must have something wrong with her...so there's no reason to be afraid of speaking to her! You can't spend your whole stay in total silence...just try!_ John thought as he made his way back over to her, gathering his nerves again. "Hi!" He chirped, a big toothy grin plastered on his face. She didn't look up. "Uhm...whatcha reading?" No response. He was starting to feel a little antsy now. It had taken a lot of courage to try and talk to the new girl and now he got the feeling he was just annoying her. Maybe he should leave her alone? He turned around and started to walk away before stopping and trying one last time. "Ya know, they have more books than just the ones on that shelf."

This got the girl's attention. She looked up from the book, scanned around the room, then locked eyes with him, her head tilted slightly to one side in question. "Where?"

"The library." Now the girl's lips pulled up into a small smile. She shut the book and sat it down as she stood up. "I can ask one of the nurses if we can go! Uh...if you want!" She nodded, her smile growing, as she followed him over to a table that he would often play card games by himself on. Now, the three nurses who were on duty at the time sat there. Two of them whom John had come to know as Nurse Clover and Nurse Fin stared agonizingly over a game of solitaire, neither of them ever making any progress unless the third, Nurse Crowbar, scoffed and moved something for them. Nurse Clover, ever the jumpy fellow he was, was a little startled when John and Rose approached the table.

"Hey guys, can we go check out the library?" John had become rather comfortable around all the nurses, being the only patient in the hospital for over two weeks he had had plenty of time to get familiar with all of them and had learned all of their strange nicknames.

"You've never wanted to go to the library before?" Nurse Fin looked a little suspicious as his eyes darted from John to Rose and back again. He stared a little longer before shrugging, "I guess it wouldn't hurt. Crowbar, mind taking them down?" He glanced over at the tallest of the nurses who gave a grunt and resentfully stood up. He grabbed a set of keys from the nurses station and the two kids followed after him.

"Is it a big library?" Rose whispered to John as they went down the hallway, she whispered because frankly Crowbar was a bit intimidating.

John shrugged his shoulder, "Dunno, I've never been!" He scratched his head, "I uh I actually didn't even know if they had one! Guess they do though!" He replied with a slight giggle, which wasn't something he was used to doing so freely around people, but he felt rather comfortable around the girl surprisingly. Rose rolled her eyes before it donned on him, "Hey, I don't know your name!"

Rose let her voice rise some, after John had broken the silence some, it was easier for her voice to reach a normal volume. "Rose. Rose Lalonde. And yourself?"

"John Egbert!" John gave another big smile and Rose gave a slightly dry laugh at how excited the boy seemed. But then again, she hadn't seen any other patients here, she wondered how long the boy had been alone here. She didn't get the chance to ask though because they reached a large wooden door and the nurse (Crow? Was that his name?) unlocked the door and held it open for the two kids. He informed them that he didn't want to stick around in the all-too quiet room for very long and to hurry up and pick something out so they could head back. John and Rose gave nods as they slipped off in different directions of the library to look for books.

John had never been much of the booky type, although there were a few books he did enjoy. Somehow he doubted the library carried them but he went off in search of them anyway while Rose develed into the small fantasy section. There were books of witches and dragons and that was all great but not what she was looking for. "Hmm..." She hummed to herself quietly as she squatted down to read the bindings of books on the bottom shelf then found herself jumping up and down to try and reach one on the very top.

"Ah-ha!" She remarked as she discovered what she was looking for: Wizards – Magical Tales from the Masters of Modern Fantasy. It was a long shot assuming they would have it, but here it was, hardback, still with the sleeve on, she opened it and fanned through the pages, inhaling the smell of paper, and... _yes, that new book smell._ She was more than a little excited she was the first to read it in the hospital, she owned the book herself and had been nearly halfway through it before she was forced from her home and stuck in this place. She clutched it to her chest as she wandered around trying to find her new friend. Jake? Was that his name? She was rather bad with names, if you couldn't tell.

"Rose!" She heard his voice from a couple aisles away and before she could turn around, he pulled out a book from the row beside her and popped his face through, "Find anything?"

"Yes! I found this book! It was written by three New York Times bestselling authors and a lot of others!" She chirped on and it made John smile. She seemed a good three times happier than when she first showed up. He shoved the book back into its place and found her in the other aisle. She stopped talking immediately.

"What are all those?"

"Books."

"Seven of them...?"

"They're sets."

"Understandable."

John smiled as he held the stack of books starting at his waist and ending right below his chin. "These two," he tried to gesture to the bottom two, "are different magic tricks you can do with comon house hold objects! And the other five are...well..." He gave an awkward smile, "Some kinda girly romance novel set, I thought you might like them...but Wizards seem more of your thing so I'll just put these ba-"

Rose laughed and nodded with her head over at Nurse Crowbar, "I can give them a try when I finish this, thanks James!" John blushed a little and couldn't find the heart to correct her. As they approached the nurse he put down his magazine he had taken to reading and stared at John's huge stack of books.

"Got enough to read, John?" John gave a little shrug and smile. Rose cursed herself under her breath, something about getting his damn name right. Neither of the males took notice and the three headed out and back toward the common room. Crowbar settled back in with the two other nurses and stared at the game. Exactly as it was when he left. Do you see what he has to put up with?

John and Rose and settled down on the couches, both of their noses stuck in books. Rose read silently as she found her place, John with a deck of cards in one hand and his book in the other as he tested out his tricks. Every now and then he would bother Rose to watch one or pick out a card and every time he would end the trick with, "Gosh darnit, give me five more minutes on that one!" Rose would chuckle and go back to reading.

They seemed like such normal kids. They were normal. Neither of their disorders, anxiety and ocpd, were the sort of thing that usually landed someone in a mental hospital. Anyone else would just be doing therapy and possibly taking medicine. The longer the two sat there, joking back and forth, saying good bye to the nurses as their shifts changed, and growing closer as friends, the more they realized that everything would be okay.

* * *

A/N: Thank you all so much for the support!!! I haven't felt this compelled to actually write in a very, very, VERY long time! Kisses and hugs for you all!

Fun fact, because I like to give fun facts: Wizards is a real book that I own because I went through an obsessive wizard phase but I actually never read the book and pretty much just use it as a prop for Rose cosplay!

Also, I made some sprite edits for this story, although I really didn't change all that much, for the kids I changed the symbols on their shirts and for the trolls I humanstuck them (my own headcanon humanstucks) and also changed the symbols on their shirts.

Here's John (because I didn't add it in the first chapter) and Rose. John's shirt depicts the cycle of anxiety and Rose's is a book cuz thats one of her obsessions and what she hoards.

 


	5. Dave's Arrival - updated 4/25/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A scream in the middle of the night? Who could that be? Maybe its our third patient - Dave Strider.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two updates in one day? I am on a roll with this fic.  
> No but don't expect this too often, seriously lol

John was in the middle of a pretty good dream. This might have been the best sleep he'd had since he'd been in the hospital. Usually the small, plastic beds and pillows he was sure were just inflated pieces of rubber were normally impossible to sleep on, but after he and Rose had stayed up late watching a movie he was pretty tuckered out. He was in the middle of a giant chessboard in a cool outfit. He was floating around and there was this cool guy with a Mayor's sash on that reminded him of the man that would usually escort them from place to place throughout the hospital. Someone kept yelling at him from somewhere he couldn't quite see to 'do the windy thing.' He was confused but just as he was about to make it happen, a loud scream erupted through the hospital. He shot up from bed, running to his door to peek out and see what the big deal was.

He spotted Rose, also peeking from her room, rubbing at her eyes, a book clutched in one hand. _Reading yourself to sleep?_ He smiled at the thought before another scream hit his ears. He looked around but the night staff was no where to be scene. He snuck out of his room, running down the hall a little ways to Rose, "What's going on?" She shrugged and yawned. He heard footsteps and rushed back to his room before a gurney started its way down the hallway. He knew by the round of nurses that followed after it that it must be at least past one in the morning.

"Get back in your rooms!" Nurse Quarters hissed as he pushed the rolling bed down the hall, Nurse Cans and Nurse Biscuit on either side, holding someones arms down as they shrieked at the top of their lungs.

Between the cries, John could make a few words, "BRO!" Was one that was repeated the most often along with, "I DON'T BELONG IN A FUCKIN MENTAL WARD!"

Nurse Quarters gave John a harsh glare and he ducked his head back inside his room until they passed him and then he slipped his head back out to watch them wheel him into the room next to his. He heard them wrestle him out of the gurney and onto the bed, the boy still screaming his head off. A few minutes later, everything fell silent. He assumed they medicated him to calm him down. Or maybe Nurse Cans knocked him out. He couldn't be quite sure.

By this time, Rose had already grown bored with the commotion and shut her door and presumably gone back to sleep or continued reading. John knew he should do the same. He crawled back into bed and tried to drift back off to dream land but he just kept hearing the boy's voice in his head. Over and over he yelled for someone and claimed he didn't belong. John hated to say it, but he was pretty sure that guy belonged here more than him and Rose combined.

* * *

The boy awoke in an unfamiliar bed. Boring walls surrounded him, boring everything really. He blinked a few times, thinking he was still sleeping, but quickly realized he wasn't – and then he realized where he was. He slid his feet off the side of the bed, standing and shivering as the cold floor touched his bare feet. He wandered to the door of his room and scanned around the hall for a few minutes before he wobbled out to the common room.

Some kid with buckteeth and a blonde girl were playing a card game on the floor. A nurse was preparing some sort of machine that's used to checked blood pressure but he was pretty sure it would actually inject you with more of that medicine they shot him with last night. He made a mental note to avoid 'getting his blood pressure checked.' Another nurse was casually watching some TV while a man in a suit smiled at the boy and waved him over.

Sheesh, are all the nurses here guys? And none of them were even very cute. That was more than a little disappointing to him as he walked over to the man with platinum blonde, almost white, hair. "Good morning, David." The man said politely.

"Sup."

"I'm sorry your arrival had to be so...forceful last night." The man tried to give him an expression that was as close to apologetic as he could muster but Dave saw right through it.

"Yeah. Forcefull's a pretty damn good word for it." Dave muttered.

"My name is Nurse Scratch, and this is Nurse Itchy, Nurse Doze, and Nurse Trace." The man gestured to each of the other three men, introducing them the same way he had done for John a few weeks earlier.

Dave snickered, "One, two, and three, huh? And you're Scratch? What are you, a game of fuckin' pool?"

Nurse Scratch smiled, "Yes, actually that's what we got all our nicknames from. We aren't allowed to give our real names to the patients and there was coincidentally just enough of us for the theme to work!" He gave a dramatic sigh, "Although, some of our crew ended up working as therapists and medical doctors here on the unit, but our name-game holds strong!"

"Uh-huh." Dave was rather uninterested in the strange man's ramblings. "So are you going to tell me anything interesting, like say, why the hell I'm here, or what?"

Nurse Scratched sighed again, less dramatic this time, more of a "do I have to?" kind of sigh as he sat down at a table and pulled out a chair for Dave. Dave took the seat as he watched the man's face. "Your...brother contacted us a week ago. He says your...episodes have been getting more and more out of hand. He didn't want to, I stress that to you, Dave, he didn't want to, but he had no choice. He couldn't constantly be getting calls from your school to come get you because you were having out bursts. It was affecting his job and he was worried he wouldn't be able to support you...until you got this under control."

Dave stared at the man, silent, emotionless. The longer he stared, the stranger he started to feel.

Oh.

Right.

"Can I have my shades back?"

Nurse Scratch let a third sigh at the fact Dave wasn't flipping his shit as he reached in his pocked and pulled the dark aviators out. "They said you'd be asking for these." Dave slipped them on his face and stood up from the table. "Are you alright, David?"

Dave waved him off, "It's just schizophrenia."

Just schizophrenia, he says, as if its something easy to deal with. As if seeing the puppets his brother sold come to life was something normal or casual. As if hearing their angry, depressing little voices in his head day after day was something he could just shrug off.

Dave looked down at his side as he walked to go stare out the window, he made sure no one was watching before he spoke. "Hey Cal."

"Even your own brother didn't want you." Cal hissed up at him as he clamped his arms around Dave's leg, swinging back and forth with every move of his legs.

"I know."

"No one really wants you around."

"I know."

"So what are you gonna do about it?"

Dave shrugged and Cal pouted as he crawled up his body to rest on the nook of his elbow as he pressed one hand against the wall and stared out the only window in the room.

"Can you hand me that?"

Dave turned around and saw the blonde girl from before pointing at something near his foot. He tapped the coin with his foot to stop it from rolling and picked it up. He turned it over in his hand before giving back to the girl. She smiled at him, "John's trying to teach me to make a coin appear in your ear." She said with an excited look on her face, but from her eyes he could tell she was bored to tears.

Dave crossed his legs as he sat down with the two, "Try it on me, always wanted a penny in my ear." The boy she had referred to as John gave a smile as he held out his hand with the coin on his palm. Dave watched it, already knowing the trick as he waved his hand over it and suddenly it was gone. He reached his hand up to Dave's ear and pulled his hand back to reveal the coin again. John had a huge smile on his face and the girl gave a polite clap. "Good trick, dude, gonna tell us how you did it?"

"Well, Rose already knows, but I can show you if you wa-"

Dave cut him off, "You call yourself a magician? Don't ever reveal your secrets, man." He gave a chuckle as John looked down at the floor as if he was rethinking every decision he had ever made in life.

John looked back up, "I-I'm John, by the way! And this is Rose!"

"I caught on."

"Oh." John looked back down again, contemplating the meaning of life.

Rose pipped up again, "John's pretty much the best magician I've ever met. He's even made up some of his own tricks! He doesn't tell me how he does those, just the ones he read in books since he knows I'll just look them up anyway."

Dave gave her a nod and smile, "You two seem pretty cute, how long you been dating?"

Rose looked a little shocked and John drooped his head even lower. "Oh no, you've misunderstood! Me and John get along well but we'd never date!"

"Why, you like chicks?" Dave said with a smirk.

"Yes."

"...oh." Now Dave felt a bit like a total dick and trying to lighten the mood he added, "And what, he likes dudes?"

"Yes..." John mumbled under his breath and you could practically _hear_ him blushing.

"...oh." _Damn,_ Dave thought, _these kids must think I'm an insufferable prick._ That's when Cal's voice came back again, telling him he'd never make friends with these two, that he'd already made himself out to be a total jerk. He pushed those thoughts away, "Well I'm bisexual so..."

"So...?" Rose said a little snarkily.

"Uh...I don't know...just letting you guys know I'm not against your lifestyle or whatever." Dave shrugged, "Look, I'm pretty bad with this shit, so I'll get on with it. I'm Dave and I'm schizophrenic now you all say 'hi Dave' in a monotone voice." No one said anything but John's lips turned up in a small smile and he saw his big teeth buck back out again. They sat in silence for a moment.

"Hi Dave." John said quietly as he finally looked up, regaining a bit of confidence after hearing that Dave wasn't the best with introductions either. "I'm John and I have anxiety."

Together, in a monotone voice, Dave and Rose said, "Hi John."

"I'm Rose and I have obsessive compulsive personality disorder."

"You have a personality disorder?" John asked. "I thought you had to be 18 to have one of those?" Rose shrugged and John retracted in on himself, deciding not to ask about that kind of thing anymore.

As Rose, John, and their new friend Dave sat together, doing stupid magic tricks, the day slowly passed, the three of them heading off to therapy with their respective therapist or to talk to different doctors, eventually the day turned to night and the three of them headed back to their rooms.

John was just pulling back the covers on his bed when he heard his door open. He turned around to see Dave peeking his head through, "Yo!" He called and gave John a smile and a wave.

John walked over to the door, checking out the hallway, "We're supposed to be asleep! What are you doing out here?"

"I wanna go see whats on the third floor." Dave said, excitedly.

"They told me not to go up there," John shrugged, "It's probably just some old storage place or an infirmary."

Dave rolled his eyes, "If it was storage, why did they make a big deal about going up there? And they wouldn't put an infirmary on the third floor, that's just dumb." John frowned, "Look, I'm going up there, I just thought...you might wanna hang out with me or something." John looked down and shuffled his feet awkwardly. He glanced back at his bed, before pushing through the door, closing it quietly behind him and giving Dave a smile.

Rose glanced out her room and shook her head slightly without even looking up from her book before John could even ask her to tag along. Dave gave a little sigh of relief and John gave him a questioning look about it but quickly waved it off and they started down the hallway.

Most of the hospital was on the bottom floor, all the classes and the common room, the cafeteria too. The entire second floor was just made up of patient rooms in a long hallway that circled around back to the start again. The rooms on the outside had one small, blurry window but the ones on the inside didn't have any windows at all. John silently thanked he had a window-room before briefly wondering how they managed to get Dave on a gurney to the second floor. Oh well. Plot holes aren't important.

They continued down the hallway to find the staircase, Dave climbing first, John in tow. The top floor was different than the others, instead of just opening right up to a hallway or a room, there was a door before you could even step off the stairs.

"Oh jeez, I bet its locked, let's head back now..." John mumbled as he started back down the stairs. Dave grabbed his arm, holding him still, whispering for him to wait as he reached for the door knob. It was unlocked it. He gave a smirk to John who reluctantly climbed back up the stairs. Once through the door, they found themselves in a large hallway. It was very fancy with a red and green theme. There were small marble statues every so often against the walls and large portraits patterned down the corridor. On one side, all the pictures were of a man. He looked angry and stern, he was bald and he held his hands to his suspenders as he gave a disgusted look to whoever was staring back.

On the opposite side they were of a lovely woman. She had short, curly white hair and a pleasant smile on her face. She wore a green overcoat that any other woman would look masculine in, but she could pull it off. Dave and John looked from picture to picture as they noticed how similar the two looked. They must be related, they decided. They stood staring at the pictures for a few minutes before Dave felt something pull on his pants.

He looked down to see one of his hallucinations, Cal, standing beside him. "Someone's coming." Cal whispered as he pointed down the hall. Dave had heard something stir but had pushed it away. He stared down the long, seemingly never ending hallway for a moment before he heard footsteps. Cal was right.

"Goddamnit...!" Dave whispered as he grabbed John's hand, yanking him back down the hallway. John made a few protests at first but realized Dave meant business and quickly chased after him. The two ran down the stairs, leaving the door behind them wide open, before ducking into John's room. Dave looked around but Cal had disappeared.

"Who ya lookin' for?" John wondered as he shut his door back after glancing around to make sure no one was really chasing them.

"Uh...no one." Dave muttered.

John nodded and sat on his bed, Dave took a seat on the other bed across the room from him.The two sat for a minute, catching their breath and calming down. "So...why did we run? I didn't hear anyone else up there. Maybe you were just hearing things..."

Dave glared at him from behind his shades, "Not every single thing I hear is a hallucination."

"I-I know that I just...I didn't mean it like that..." John stammered. "I just mean like, I don't think anyone was there, so we can go back if you want! It was actually pretty cool up there!"

Dave watched John's expression change and sighed. "Nah, we've got plenty of time for that. But, hey, can I sleep in here tonight? I'm tired as fuck and I don't feel like going back out."

John looked up to see Dave had already made himself comfortable on the second made, "Oh, I don't know if we're allowed to switch rooms like tha-"

"Fuck the police." Dave said with a grin and John smiled back, crawling under his own covers.

He glanced across the room at his new friend before closing his eyes, "Good night, Dave."

"Night John."

* * *

A/N: Let the JohnDave begin <3

Geez I wasn't expecting people to actually read this and I've gotten a couple nice reviews in just the couple days its been up I was so pumped for writing this I wrote two chapters in one day!!! I hope you guys are liking it so far! And I'm sorry for killing the JohnRose but at least it was there for a little while, yeah?

 

Here's my sprite Dave edit! His symbol is a red butterfly that represents a butterfly shape that appears in the brains of schizophrenics (or so I've read anyway)! Oh and the butterfly is horribly mis-centered but I kinda dig it so...


	6. Jade's Arrival - updated 4/25/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose has a roommate, but why is she in a hospital gown? Rose wonders if she'd like to borrow some pajamas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNINGS ABOUND IN THIS CHAPTER!!! Trigger warnings for this chapter include: rape, incest (grandfather/granddaughter), and attempted murder! There will be a "TW" at the beginning of any paragraphs that go into explicit detail on any of these subjects!

Dave awoke to an angry Nurse Scratch, fussing at him about sleeping in the wrong room. "Man...calm your shit, what's the big deal?"

Nurse Scratch huffed, "The _big deal_ , Mr. Strider, is that you are under constant surveillance. Their in a camera in your room that the night staff watches to make sure are not having any breakdowns. It is very important to your recovery that we watch you at all times!"

John sat up from his bed and looked around nervously, "U-uh, you mean there isn't a camera in this room to watch me?"

Nurse Scratch shook his head, "No, only certain rooms have cameras installed and we only place special patients in those rooms. Everyone else is given privacy at least while they are asleep in case of..." he coughed slightly into his hand, "...personal reasons." John didn't understand but Dave snickered at the thought of John ever needing any privacy in his room. "Anyway, you will be in your correct room tomorrow, right David?" Dave grumbled a yes and Nurse Scratch smiled as he walked out of the room. He peeked back in one last time, "And you boys should really steer clear of exploring, you might find out something you never wanted to know."

Dave and John exchanged confused glances, they really hadn't found anything of real interest on the third floor. Sure, it was a little strange, but nothing frightening or serious. Maybe there was more upstairs than just a hallway with pictures? Dave made a mental note to _definitely_ check it back out again. John made a mental note to never go anywhere Dave wanted to go ever again.

The two boys pulled themselves from their beds, John rummaging through his small dresser for his clothing, Dave said he'd see him later as he left the room. John went to the bathroom to change, in case Dave came back in without knocking. He pulled on his shirt just before he left his room. Rose's door was open and she was nowhere to be found. He assumed she must have already headed out for breakfast that morning. He wandered down the stairs and out to the day room, finding his two friends had already settled down with their trays and began to eat. His retrieved his own and three began their usual chatter.

* * *

"You've been doing much better, Mr. Egbert!" A small man said happily as he swiveled his chair around to smile at John. John adjusted himself awkwardly in the large couch across from his therapist. "The nurses have told me you've even been able to make friends with the other patients!" John gave a light smile and nodded his head. "I think it could be time for a family session." He said this easily, with less enthusiasm and praise in his voice than the other sentences.

"Eggs, I don't know about that..." John said quietly, his face looking more than a little afraid to talk to his father again about this kind of thing.

"I know you're scared, John, but its something that is necessary for your treatment plan." Eggs said, trying to be as understanding to John's situation with his father as possible. "I'll set it up for some time in the next few weeks, alright?" He stood up from his chair and opened the door, "Would you send David in next, please?" John nodded as he left the small office.

John approached Dave and Rose, playing a game of Guess Who.

"Is your person wearing a shirt?"

"Dave, they are all wearing shirts."

"I meant skirt."

"You can't even see their lower bodies."

"Uh, hey guys, sorry to interrupt," John said, cutting into their game, "Eggs wants to talk to you, Dave."

Dave stood up and stretched a little, "Never thought someone would tell me that some unborn chicken fetuses wanted to talk to me." He mumbled as he made his way into the office. Their conversation started off slow, how is your school work, what are your grades like, do you get along with your family, etc. Then, Eggs cut to the chase.

"Tell me about Cal, David." The therapist said quietly.

Dave looked up then looked out the window in the office. He could see birds flying around here and there, but mostly he just saw a huge fence. He took a deep sigh and shrugged. "I don't know, he's this little dude. He's got a little orange suit and this big blue shirt on over top that says his name. Grey hat and red dots on his cheeks."

Eggs nodded his head, "And do you know anyone who dresses like this, David?"

"Please just call me Dave." Dave sighed before continuing, "No. The only thing I've ever seen that looks like him is Bro's puppet, Cal. When I was little, I used to think the puppet would come to life and he was my friend or some shit. Then I started seeing them in the same room. The puppet would be just chillin' wherever he pleased but still, there was Cal, hangin' on my leg or whatever." He shrugged again, he seemed to do a lot of shrugging when it came to talking about his illness, like he didn't want people to fret over it so he tried to make it seem like it wasn't a big deal.

"Does Cal ever speak to you, uh, Dave?" Eggs asked as he scribbled some things down on a notebook.

Dave nodded, "He tells me no one likes me, no one wants me around, I'm just annoying and stupid, shit like that. Not a big deal, sometimes I can ignore him."

"And what about when you can't ignore him?"

"I start to feel pretty shitty. Like, maybe he's right, ya know? My own Bro didn't even want to deal with me..."

"That's not the case, Dave." Eggs said, stopping him. "Your brother loves you. He's called here many times since you got here asking how long we expect your stay to be. He's claimed he will be up here in a week to take you home, regardless of if we release you." He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, "You're brother has a past, Dave, one that may become more clear to you during your stay here, and I think that's important for you. All of your friends have something they need to learn about themselves, but most importantly, about their families. You children are far more tied to this building than you understand. Not to mention, you are not anywhere near stable enough to re-enter society. Not after how you acted upon your arrival, anyway. So, when, or if, you're brother shows up, we need you to tell him you want to stay. It is for your own good, Dave, so you can get better. You want to get better, right?"

* * *

"Uh..." Rose said quietly as she crossed her arms. She stared at the lady in the black dress-suit across from her, her large hat and her dull face turned away from her as she typed away on her computer. "Are you going to speak to me, or ...?"

The woman turned to face her, "Oh, I am sorry Mrs. Lalonde, this will only take a few more moments. I apologize." The woman said sarcastically before turning back to her computer.

"Look, _Snowman_ , I still don't understand how your name fits in with this whole pool theme you and your posse have, but mostly I don't get why you decided to become a therapist if you're nothing but an underhanded bitch." Rose stood up, "You call me in for my therapy session ten minutes before bedtime and then expect me to just sit here and watch you type? Sorry, but no thanks. You can talk to me tomorrow." She left the room, slamming the door behind her. John and Dave had already headed off to bed half an hour ago and were no doubt sneaking into each others rooms to talk about whatever it was those two spent so much time talking about.

Rose made her way up the stairs and into her room, changing quickly into a pair of pajamas. She pulled her book out from beneath her pillow as she settled into her bed. She flipped open to the dog-eared page she had been on just the night before. One and a half chapters left until she finished the book. She curled up under her blankets, her book propped against the wall in front of her as she read, silently, smiling at some of the bits of wizard-humor and grimacing at some of the more wicked villains. She had only been maybe four pages in when someone knocked on her door. She called that they could come in and in walked one of the evening nurses, Nurse Stitch, accompanied by a young girl.

She had long, black hair, big, round, over-sized glasses, one lenses cracked and almost shattered, and a hospital gown on. She looked shaken and nervous. Rose understood how awkward it was to be new to this place. She smiled at the girl, "Is this my new roommate?"

Nurse Stitch nodded as he nudged the new girl inside, informing her that the girl's name was Jade and she was very shaken up and needed some sleep, so if she wouldn't mind to put away the book and turn off the light. Rose nodded and Nurse Stitch left Jade to speak to Rose on her own.

Jade slowly entered the room and Rose could tell she really was quite upset. She sat down on the bed across from the blonde girl. She tried to fluff her pillow but soon gave up attempting to make the bed more comfortable, realizing it was useless. She curled up under the blanket, adjusting the light smock that hung over her.

"So, Jade, where are you're clothes at?" Rose asked. Maybe she was a run-away and they were in the laundry right now? She didn't mind letting Jade borrow her extra pair of pj pants, but before she could even offer, Jade was in tears, curled up in the fetal position on the bed.

**TW**

Where were her clothes? Jade tried to remember, but her memory was fuzzy. She could grasp bits and pieces of what happened, but most of it was a lost cause.

Oh, yes. He took them.

She remembered laying in her room, curled up under her covers. She was texting a friend. They were giggling as they sent each other dumb emoticons, occasionally screen shotting it when it was too good to be forgotten. Her grandfather entered her room. She thought she was going to be scolded for being loud, "Sorry, Grandpa! I'm going to bed soon!" She called out before her attention was drawn back to the phone. Her grandfather didn't leave though, he entered deeper into her room until he was at the foot of her bed. "Grandpa? Are you okay?" Jade sat up to check on him when she noticed he was naked. She covered her eyes, "Ahh! Are you sleep walking!?" She tossed a stuffed animal at him, "Get out of here like that!"

He didn't budge, he walked closer to her, pulling back the covers of her bed. "Jane..." He whispered quietly.

"My name is Jade, Grandpa!" Jade insisted as she scooted away from him. She knew you weren't supposed to wake up a sleepwalker, but this was just too strange for her to just ignore.

That's when he reached for her, grabbing onto her pajama shorts, pulling them down, pulling himself on top of her. She screamed and tried to push him off but he kissed her, trying to quiet her. She bit at his lips to get him off, flailing around with everything she could to get away. He was on top of her, touching her in ways she never wanted him to touch her. He whispered things into her ear that made her want to throw up. It was despicable and wrong, she screamed that at him over and over along with a few choice words.

Luckily, she had been able to keep a grip on her phone. She dialed 911 and felt around for the speaker button, years of texting in class finally coming in handy. She heard a woman's voice over the phone and screamed out, "HELP! I'M BEING RAPED!" As loud and as clearly as she could before her grandfather grabbed the phone from her hand and ended the call abruptly. He reached under Jade's bed, pulling out the first gun of many he could get his hands on.

"You'll be mine forever, Jane..." He whispered as he aimed the gun at his granddaughter's face. He pulled the trigger. With all the commotion going on, his usual gun-expertise backfired on him, instead of pulling out a regular gun, he had only managed to snag a BB gun. The small ball hit Jade's glasses with force enough to crack them, but not enough to shatter. It rebounded, coincidentally going straight into her grandfather's open, laughing mouth. He choked as he grabbed at his neck, just long enough for Jade to scramble out from under him.

Jade ran from the room, down flight after flight of spiral stairs. She ran into the kitchen to find the phone that hung on the wall. She called 911 back as fast as possible. She heard footsteps coming down the stairs. She relayed her address on to them and informed them she would be trying to take cover somewhere in the area.

Jade snapped out of her flashback at this point. She blinked her eyes around. She wasn't in that house anymore. She wasn't with her grandfather anymore. She was in a safe place. She took a deep breath and tried to dry her eyes. The blonde girl, Rose, had sat on the edge of her bed now, presumably she had been trying to calm her down during her breakdown.

Rose saw her calm down finally, "Are you...are you alright...?" She asked gently.

Jade was still before she gave a slight nod. "I-I'm pretty good, I guess!"

Rose gave a smile, "Are you sure?"

Jade nodded again, "I just need some sleep." Rose nodded as she stood up and made her way back to her own bed.

"Hey Jade?"

"Yes?"

"I hope you're okay."

"I do too..."

* * *

A/N: Holy shiznits that was the most difficult chapter to write by far. Jade's story is definitely the saddest of the one's I've written so far...thankfully she's the only one with a history of being raped, from what I have planned as of now, anyway.

Well, that's it for the kid's chapters, now the trolls will start to be introduced! Remember, its humanstuck though!

Here's my Jade edit, which is definitely the most boring edit of all. I couldn't find any good symbols that accompany PTSD so I just wrote PTSD on her shirt in her color :T


	7. Karkat's Arrival - updated 4/25/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who is this douchebag? Oh wait its just Karkat Vantas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was seriously planning on introducing multiple characters in this chapter because I thought writing an entire chapter for Karkat would be difficult but then...  
> Davekat feels just took over and well...  
> Yeah, I really have no excuse for this.
> 
> TRIGGER WARNINGS: Quite a bit of talk about suicidal behavior, suicidal thoughts, and self harm! The paragraph where it starts is TW'd at the beginning but its pretty sporadic and sorta just bounces all over the chapter wherever it falls. You've been warned.

"Who is he?" Dave asked, staring at the new boy. The smaller boy sat right next to the fire escape door, staring out the small window. He had been sitting there for nearly ten minutes. Rose shrugged.

"What's he doing...?" John pipped in, but before his question could even be thought about, someone popped up behind the boy, tapping on his shoulder.

"What in the ever loving _fuck_ do you want!?" The boy hissed.

The girl just gave him a big smile, "I'm Jade!" She said, cheerily, "That's my friends, Dave, Rose, and John!" The three exchanged weary glances before waving (or in Dave's case, it was a mere head nod.)

"So?" He scowled at her as he faced back out the window. "I don't need friends. I won't be here for more than a couple days. Friends are nothing but a piece of shit to make and a piece of shit to loose, so why would I want four of them?"

Jade frowned, "Well, I just thou-"

"Maybe you should stop thinking and just go the fuck away, okay?" He cut in.

Dave stood up, tired of seeing the kid be such a jerk. He nudged Jade out of the way and stared down at the guy, "Look man, I don't know what crawled up your ass, but that ain't how you talk to ladies." The boy scoffed. "If you don't think I'll fucking rip you a new o-"

"Do it."

"What?"

TW

The boy stood up, he was much shorter than Dave but nonetheless, he got right in his face. "Punch me. I don't care. Hit me, see if I give a shit." The boy reached down and pulled up the sleeve of his long sweater, "There ain't a fucking thing you can do to me I haven't done to myself."

Dave looked down to long red marks crawling up the boy's arm. Some deep, some scarred, some looked really fresh. One in particular that started at the base of his hand and stretched up halfway to his elbow looked like it had stitches in it. Dave looked away from the boy and took a step back, giving them both their own space.

"I...look...-"

"No. Shut the fuck up, don't give me you're goddamned pity shit. I don't need to hear it."

Dave just stared at him, "I wasn't going to-"

"I know exactly what you were going to say. You were sorry for being so harsh, if only you'd known, blah blah fucking blah. I've heard it all befo-"

"That's not what I was going to say." Dave cut in and the boy stopped and looked up. He didn't look like he believed him but he stayed quiet, as if he was just amusing the idea. "I was about to say that it doesn't matter how shitty you feel, you need to at least grow a pair and not be a total dick to people who weren't even being mean to you."

The boy stared at his feet, scoffed, and plopped back down on the floor.

Dave sighed and turned around to join back with his friends. Their stereotypical AA-meeting introduction had worked pretty well with acquainting Dave with Rose and John but after Rose told them what happened with the new girl, they steered clear of trying it with her quite yet. She had been there a couple days now so they figured it was time to know her story.

They sat in a a circle and they each introduced themselves. Jade looked a little awkward when it was finally her turn, but she pulled enough courage out to speak. "Hi, I'm Jade, and I...I was raped..." They all smiled at her and said hello. No one pressured her for more information, just loving smiles and Rose even rubbed her back some. Jade smiled, glad they seemed so caring. "They say I have post traumatic stress disorder."

They heard someone nearby cough, and looked up to see the boy had turned around to face them and slowly started to scoot closer, "Hi..." he said slowly, as if he wasn't sure if he was allowed to join in, "I'm Karkat and I'm here for suicidal thoughts and actions. I have depression."

Jade gave him a big grin and Rose and John stared at each other for a moment before the three of them gave him their normal, monotone, "Hi Karkat." Dave stayed silent. Did he really think he could just jump in after what he had said and expect them to be buddy-buddy with him?

Jade scooted over and made room between her and Rose. Karkat stared at the space awkwardly before she patted for him to join them. He narrowed his eyes at Dave for a moment before he crawled over to join the circle. He didn't join into the conversation much and when he did, it was mostly cursing or vaguely implying that everyone else was wrong and should shut up. Dave couldn't keep from glaring daggers at the boy nearly any time he opened his mouth but that didn't stop him once he got going.

"What is with all these goddamned nurses!? In and fucking out of this place at weird hours, taking us around the hospital, dropping us the fuck off in whatever office with whatever douchebag they see fit!? I mean, oh my fuming prick, my goddamned therapist's name is "Eggs"...what kind of crotchstainingly stupid name is "Eggs"? Can anyone fucking tell me?" Karkat ranted and raved, his arms flailing around in exaggerated emotion. Dave rolled his eyes. John and Jade exchanged light giggles as the boy came out of his shell.

Rose shrugged, "Have you heard some of the other names around this place?"

"Oh don't even get me started on some of the other names in this hellhole."

Dave snorted, "Yeah Rose, don't get him started. He might throw together crude words into something he percieves as a cuss word and scream them at us for another two minutes." Karkat glared, Dave smiled.

 

* * *

"Oh hell no."

Dave had just gotten out of a nice, long shower and was ready to get in bed for the night but who happened to be making himself nice and comfy in the spare bed?

"Look, I ain't too globefondling excited about this shit either." Karkat muttered, pulling back his covers.

Dave shut his eyes tightly, pinching the bridge of his nose. "What do half the words that spill from your mouth even _mean_?"

Karkat shrugged. "I just say whatever feels natural."

Dave ignored him, pulling his own sheets back, he laid down, and turned to face the wall. He didn't say anything. Karkat sighed and looked around the room. Dave's things were scattered everywhere and he was obviously pretty comfortable not sharing his room. He looked up in the corner of the room to see the small camera that surveyed every inch of the place. Grumbling to himself, he picked up all of Dave's discarded things and piled them haphazardly against the wall on his side of the room.

With Dave still silent, Karkat turned out the lights and crawled into bed. He laid on his back staring at the ceiling. What had he gotten himself into? Stuck in this place with all these other kids...

All these other, really friendly, kids. He knew how long it would take him to be able to call them 'friends' but he also knew how bad it would hurt when it was time for him, or one of them, to leave. That's why he had been so apprehensive about it in the first place. Three of them, however, had been rather accepting of him but it would be his luck to room with the only one who wasn't.

Karkat rolled over onto his side, facing Dave across the room. "Hey. Hey fuckwad." Dave didn't say anything, "Are you awake?"

"What do you want...?" Dave grumbled, but Karkat could tell he hadn't been asleep at all.

"So, I know we got off on the wrong foot and all bu-"

"No."

"What?"

"No. I'm not going to forgive you yet."

Karkat was silent. "Dave, I-"

"Goodnight Karkat."

Silence.

"Goodnight Dave..."

* * *

TW the next few paragraphs

The next morning, Karkat awoke to Dave already being gone. One of the nurses, whom he didn't care to learn the ridiculous name of, had come to wake him up and inform him he was about to miss breakfast. He groaned and stretched and made his way to the bathroom. He took off the long sleeved black shirt he always wore and stared at himself in the mirror. Cuts and bruises crawled up his arms and littered his chest. He turned to the side and ran his fingers down the large gash that showed brightly against his pale skin. His legs were a tattered mess and on good days the bruises along his neck weren't as visible as others.

He let out a deep breath as he scratched at his arm. Most of his cuts were healing and scabbing over and a part of cuts healing was that they started to itch. He had known this itch rather well. He scratched at them absentmindedly as he pulled off the rest of his clothes and got in the shower. He knew there was a camera in the bathroom. He had to be constantly watched in case he grew suicidal and tried something. He was told when he arrived he had to room with the only other patient who was also on constant observation, who turned out to be Dave. He adjusted the temperature notch by notch as if it was a science until he hit the perfect spot. He stood in the water, letting it mat down his dark hair as he closed his eyes.

He wondered why Dave was under surveillance too, he wondered why Dave hated him so much anyway. He shrugged, a lot of people hated him. His family, his friends, random people he didn't know. Everyone hated him – even when they said they loved him. He tried not to buy into the idea of 'love.' It seemed so dumb and foreign and just something he wasn't interested in.

A knock on the door and a voice informed him that if he didn't hurry up, John had dibs on his breakfast.

He clicked off the water, shaking his head a little like a dog before stepping out. He found a towel and wrapped it around his lower half. He briefly wondered if it would be possible to tie the towel around his neck and hang himself from the shower rod. He gave the rod a pull and deemed it not even worth attempting. He shook his hair again before he realized he had forgotten to bring clean clothes in with him. He peeked out to make sure the door was closed before he darted out in search of finding something clean to wear.

* * *

"Is that my shirt?" John asked, staring at Karkat who had finally come out in time for breakfast.

Karkat pulled it out and looked at it, "I thought it was Dave's. It was in his stuff." John looked at Dave, giving him a suspicious stare. Dave gave him an awkward 'I've been caught' smile.

Dave turned to Karkat, "Wait, why were you trying to wear my shirt?"

"Mine was dirty."

Jade giggled, "You boys are so silly, trading clothes!"

"Jade, I do not think that John willingly gave Dave his shirt, I think it is more likely Dav-" Rose started but with a glare from Dave and a questioning look from Jade, she stopped short. The five stood around in silence for a little while before it was broken with the sound of the ward's doors opening.

The small, caution-tape-scrubs man escorted in a young girl. The five watched her stride her way over to talk to the nurses for a few minutes, as was customary when you first entered, before she joined their small group.

She had dull-red hair and pointed red sunglasses. Dave made a mental note to tell her they were pretty rad. She held a stick-thing with a dragon head on the top. John was pretty sure it was some kind of cane and she _must_ be into Broadway dancing. She gave a big grin and inhaled through her nose deeply, "Name's Terezi!" She chirped, "And may I just say, you all taste _great_."

* * *

A/N: Funfact: All of the ridiculous Karkat insults DO NOT belong to me, they belong to a Karkat insult generator on generatorland.com =_= I am not creative enough to make those up so pretty much all of his insults will be from a generator!

If you haven't figured this out yet, I'm not really one of those fancy, flowery writers that describes every little scene in as much detail as you can manage. I wish I was, those are usually the most beautiful fanfics to read, but I'm far more blunt of a writer. I like to focus on dialogue, actions, and emotions rather than descriptions. I'm trying to get better with descriptions and I really work at it, I can get going pretty well sometimes, but for the most part, just expect my stories/updates/whatever to be rather straight forward "just get on with the plot" sort of things.  (/◕ヮ◕)/。.:*・°☆.。.

Oh and I don't really read over anything much before I post it so yeah, there's a lot of mistakes in pretty much everything I write and I need a beta reader cuz if I read it myself I end up hating it and I'll never post anything so... P:

Here's Karkat and Terezi! Karkat's shirt is obviously a noose and Terezi's is a teal music note! (that will make more sense once you find out about her disorder.)


	8. Terezi's Arrival - updated 4/25/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is Terezi Pyrope gonna fucking eat us?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So TECHNICALLY Terezi arrived last chapter but whatever this is her 'getting to know me' chapter so I will name it what I like.

"Name's Terezi!" She chirped, "And may I just say, you all taste _great._ "

Dave leaned into John, "Is she gonna fucking eat us?" John shrugged, his eyes glancing back and forth from the new girl to Karkat. The new boy was standing in the hallway where he had been previously as they mocked him about his choice of attire. He stood still, staring at the girl, not moving at all.

"Karkat...?" John called to him, "Hey, come say hi!" He didn't move.

In all honesty, Karkat was more than sort of freaking out. He knew that girl. They went to the same school. She was blind so she was with the special education class and because of a few run-ins with hurting himself at school, Karkat was too, so he could be watched properly.

"Karkat?" Terezi asked, "That's an usual name, no way do you share it with someone." She smiled as she felt her way over to him, she knew his approximate location because of how John had thrown his voice to talk to him.

"Terezi ain't such a popular name either." Karkat huffed out after he could finally get his words together. He had really thought he had gotten away from this freak. Being blind wasn't what was freaky, no, that's not weird, that's just a disability. What was weird was the way this girl perceived things. She said she could taste colors or hear feelings and different things that really didn't correlate with one another at all. There had been quite a few times he would be drawing or writing and she would walk up and lay her hand on the paper for a few minutes before claiming she knew exactly what it was. She was usually wrong but he never said anything.

John and Dave looked at each other, exchanging glances with Rose and Jade too.The four of them stayed silent and let the two new kids talk. "So how'd you end up in this place?" Terezi giggled a little as she asked this, throwing her arm around his shoulders.

Karkat tried to slump away but it was useless, "Ugh...I...tried to kill myself. You know, the normal shit I do..."

Terezi frowned, "I thought you promised me you were only cutting for release or whatever and you wouldn't ever resort to suicide?"

Karkat shrugged and Terezi was silent. "I just shrugged."

"I know."

* * *

A few weeks later...

John took a bite out of his sandwich, looking up at Dave who sipped casually at his drink, staring off past him. "Whatcha lookin' at?" Dave shrugged. John frowned, "Why're you always so pissy about Karkat?" John swiveled around to find the boy. He was sitting at a different table, surrounded by Terezi, Rose, and Jade, all seemingly poking fun at the boy. John gave him a smile and a wave. Karkat didn't respond. He turned back to Dave, "He's a nice guy once you talk for a bit!"

Dave took a deep breath and let it out. John really didn't understand anything, did he? Dave had forgiven Karkat for his original douchebag ways of when he first arrived, there was something new the guy was doing that got under his skin even more now.

The way he acted with Terezi. The way he almost smiled when he was around her, the way he joked around and the two would mockingly push each other back and forth. The way she laughed out loud at his ridiculous curse words. Dave wasn't jealous. Don't get him wrong, he was glad the two hit it off so well. They obviously had a history and being together in this place had reignited it. He had just thought, well, Karkat was going to be in a relationship with _someone else._

"John...do you really want to know why he pisses me off so bad?"

John looked up from his food, nodding eagerly then quickly adding, "I-If you want to, you don't have to..."

Dave let out a sigh as he started his story.  
"So, remember when that fucker first got here? All up in arms about everything someone said to him? That first night, he tried to apologize to me and like, become friends or some shit I guess. I wasn't havin' it though and it pissed him off, guess I was the first person who didn't bend to his every will just cuz he cuts himself." Dave shrugged, "Anyway, he tried that again and again, every night for like a week. Finally, I gave in. I told him I'd be his friend if he'd stop being a dick to everyone. Thing was, that motherfucker didn't wanna be my friend. He was just ticked off I didn't like him, he just wanted reassurance I didn't hate him. I'd try to talk to him after and he'd just fuckin' ignore me, act like I wasn't there until we were all alone."

Dave pushed the tray in front of him out of the way and folded his arms in it's place, resting his chin on his forearm. "Late at night, he'd get in the damn bed with me. Tell me no one ever loved him. I'd cuddle the shit out of him, fall asleep with him in my arms...then sometime in the middle of the night he'd crawl out and go back to sleep in his own bed. Like he just wanted me to think he cared about me, then the next morning he'd act like not shit happened. One night, he tried to kiss me. I was like "Whoa, dude, you're a cutie but I ain't into you." and he got all peeved. All "Fuck you, I thought you cared!" and I was like "Man, I thought you cared?" It was really weird between us for a few days. We already didn't talk out here with you guys but then even at night when it was just the two of us, it was just too fuckin' quiet."

"Then last night I was talking to him and I was like "Yo, can't we just be bros?" and he was like "I'll think about." I'll think about it? What do you have to think about, fucker? One minute you try to get your mack on with me and the next you have to think about if we can be friends or not? Man, fuck that guy. Until he tries to fix shit with me, I don't want jack to do with him."

John stared at his tray, tracing patterns in his mashed potatoes with his fork. "So...you...you're just mad 'cause he doesn't care about you?"

Dave tucked his head into his arms, "It's sounds so homo when you put it that way..."

"I thought you were bisexual?"

"I...I am...I just don't like that guy...playin' with my fuckin' emotions...not cool."

John took a deep breath, letting it out through his nose as he stood up, picking up his tray and taking Dave's with his other. "I...I wouldn't play with your emotions..." He said quietly before he turned and walked off.

* * *

Jade sat in front of Rose on her bed, Rose ran her fingers through Jade's long hair before separating it into three parts and beginning a simple braid. Terezi stood at the mirror in the room, applying a moisturizer to her face. "This shit really work?" She asked, rubbing the creme in.

"Yes, it worked rather well for me. It was very expensive, my mother brought it back from Europe." Rose chirped, threading Jade's hair through itself.

"Hey, Terezi, why're you using the mirror?" Jade called out.

Terezi's eyebrows knitted together. "Uh..." She sat down on the unoccupied bed and continued massaging the creme in, not really sure why she had tried to use the mirror.

Rose and Jade shared a chuckle at the girl, "You haven't been blind for very long, have you?" Rose asked.

Terezi shook her head, "No, just about five years ago. Sounds like a while but I still forget sometimes that I can't see since I can 'see' so well."

Jade turned her head and locked eyes with Rose, both confused, "Whaddya mean?"

"The doctors say I have something called 'synthesia' where I can smell colors or taste sounds. Lots of my senses switch around, so even though I can't see you guys, I can smell you and hear you and taste you and feel you." Terezi explained in the easiest way she could manage.

"That's rather interesting. What can you tell from my voice?" Rose asked, the disorder peaking her interest.

Terezi listened carefully, inhaling deeply through her nose and licking her lips as if she was letting the sound waft into her mouth. "You sound intelligent...you smell like fear though. You taste...like sweet and sour sauce."

Rose made an accepting face, "That's actually pretty cool."

"Oooh! Me now!" Jade quipped, clapping her hands a little. "What can you tell from my voice?" She sang a note and as she held it out, Terezi smelled her voice.

She went to lick it but quickly yanked her tongue back into her mouth, "You taste repulsive. You sound so happy but you smell so..." she had to take several more inhales, "You smell of desire."

Jade giggled, "Desire? Hehe, the only thing I desire is for you to get off my bed so I can take a nap!" She said, standing and giving Terezi a light push. Terezi toppled over onto her side, giving a quick laugh. Jade tucked herself under her covers as Terezi switched over to sit at the end of Rose's bed instead.

"So, Terezi, I'm sorry to ask if this bothers you, but why are you here?" Rose asked as gently as possible, but Terezi only shook her head.

"I don't mind at all!" She scooted back to lean against the wall behind the small bed. "I mean, I guess you could say not having a family is pretty shitty. I was an orphan and I was passed around from family to family for years. I finally got one I really liked, but they couldn't really afford a kid. I got put with a different family and well, they didn't take to my blindness all that well." She gave a shrug and the way she so easily talked about her illness reminded Rose a lot of Dave. "Said I was worthless and sometimes they'd hit me. Child protective services found out a few days ago and brought me here. I never told on them, though." She twiddled her big toes together in thought. "I probably should have though..."

Rose nodded, "Yes, you should have."

Terezi shrugged and stood up, "Well, I'm heading off for the night, so I'll talk to you girls tomorrow, alright?" Rose gave a nod and waved as she folded back her covers before Terezi left her room. She shut the door behind her quietly and turned into the main hall.

"Tell me what my voice is like."

Terezi jumped at the sudden presence in the hallway she hadn't noticed before. "Karkat?" She asked, a little startled and unsure if she had heard correctly.

"Come on, Terezi, we're friends right? Just fuckin' tell me what my voice tastes like or something." Karkat tapped his foot and his eyes darted everywhere except for her face.

Terezi narrowed her unseeing eyes, "You never asked me that before..."

Karkat rolled his own, "Well yeah, dipshit, I didn't know synthesia was that cool before."

Terezi smiled a bit at him, despite being called a 'dipshit,' she gave a sigh. "To be honest, I don't get a whole lot from the sound of your voice."

Karkat shrugged, "What else is there?"

"Smell...taste...touch." She named off the only ones left.

"Well you better get to smelling me 'cause there's no way you're gonna b-"

"Can I lick your cuts?"

Karkat took a step back, "What the shit?"

Terezi shrugged, "Can I lick your arm, the one with all the cuts on it?"

Karkat looked around the hallway a little, and was more than a little disturbed he was actually considering this. "Don't fucking dare tell anyone I let you do this..." He said quietly as he pulled up his left sleeve, the one with the most cuts on it, and held it towards her. Terezi smiled as she tickled her fingers up his forearm, turning it over a few times before pulling it up to her mouth. She smelled it lightly a few times before running her tongue across it. Karkat bit back a yelp at the stinging sensation as her tongue drug across the freshest, deepest wound. For a moment he swore she played with his stitches in her mouth.

Terezi pulled off and dropped his arm, thinking to herself, licking her lips. "You taste...you taste like sadness." Karkat let a small frown twitch across his mouth. "But strength."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO FRIENDS I AM HERE. Thank you all so much for so much helpful and sweet feedback I've been getting for this fanfic! :D
> 
> I have no edit for this chapter because I failed to introduce someone as I had previously planned. Whoops.


	9. Gamzee and Sollux's Arrivals - updated 4/25/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A boy who doesn't leave his room and a boy who refuses to stay in his room. Sollux Captor and Gamzee Makara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took a while to finally get this chapter finished...I apologize :C

Dave's lips fumbled awkwardly at John's as he accidentally nipped at his lips, "Sorry," he mumbled out quietly, but John shook his head. The two boys were blushing bright red as they mouthed at each other, neither having the guts to use their tongue just yet. "John, I just keep trying to understand, man but I just-"

John forced their lips back together, effectively silencing the blond boy. Dave gave a light smirk into the kiss, he was happy John had become so comfortable around him. Their mouths stay locked tight until they parted for air. "B...but what about Karkat?" John mumbled out, averting his eyes.

Dave brushed his hand across John's cheek, "Dude, fuck that gu-"

"You assfuckers better be decent 'cause one of those doctors are coming this way and there's a new guy!" Karkat hissed as he popped his head through the door, almost as if hearing his name mentioned had beckoned him to appear.

John's eyes grew wide at him randomly bursting into his room, but Dave casually rolled off him, propping himself on his elbow, "Calm your shit, we aren't doing anything."

Karkat rolled his eyes, "Whatever, just get your ass back to the room before they-"

Someone laid a hand on Karkat's shoulder and he turned around to see one of the larger men that worked night shift. "Go on to your room Karkat, you too Dave." Dave sighed as he pulled himself from John's bed and followed Karkat to the next room over. "Dave, if we keep catching you in other patient's rooms you're going to be punished." He said, escorting Dave out of the room.

"Er...Cans, is he my new roommate?" John asked, looking around to see the boy who was leaned against his door frame. He had unruly, dark hair and droopy, sleepy looking eyes. The best description for the boy was 'perpetually high.'

Cans looked at the taller boy and sighed, "Gamzee? Oh no, he's under constant watch." John nodded his head, laying back down, pulling his covers up to his chin. Cans shut the door as he lead Gamzee down the hall. He opened an empty room for him, dropped his bags inside, and walked off. Gamzee shrugged, watching him leave. He picked up his bags, flicked on the lights, and shut the door with his foot behind him. His head was pounding as he dropped onto a bed and picked through his bag. Where was it...where was it? He pulled everything from his bag before dumping it upside down. Not here...did the doctors go through his stuff? Fuck, his head hurt. The light was too bright, and the silence was too loud.

He shoved the stuff off his bed, fumbling over to turn off the light switch. When he was at his bed again, he didn't even bother getting under the covers and passed out as soon as his head hit the pillow.

* * *

Dave dealt out 7 cards to his five friends and himself.

"Everyone here knows how to play Go Fish, correct?" Rose asked, checking around the circle.

Karkat let out an exasperated sigh, "If I say 'no' how long is it going to take you to explain it?"

"It's a rather simple game, actually, it shouldn't take me too lo-"

"You ask for cards that you have, if someone has one like it, they give it to you and go you, you got a point, if not you pick up a new one, boo hoo." Dave cut in, ignoring the glare Rose gave him.

Karkat gave a nod that he understood and the game began. About halfway through, John looked up from his deck, "Hey, has anyone seen that new guy? It's nearly lunch and he hasn't come from his room yet..."

His question was met with a variety of shrugs or 'I dunno's and he stood up, laying his cards face down. "I'll be back, you can play without me, okay?" They all nodded, Karkat started to peek at his cards, but Terezi slapped them back down.

John headed toward the group of nurses gathered around a small table. He explained he had left something in his room and needed to get it. They didn't ask too many questions and let him go on. He climbed the staircase to the second floor, passing his own room to find the room on the other side of Dave and Karkat's. The door was cracked open but was dark inside except for a stream of light spilling from the bathroom.

He pushed the door open, "H-hey, Gamzee...you there?" He didn't see the boy on his bed, but he heard a splash and a groan from the bathroom. "Y-you okay in there?" He was answered by another gurgle and the flush of a toilet. A few minutes later, the boy emerged from the bathroom, his shirt was off and he was using it to wipe off his mouth.

"Are you sick? Should I get a nurse...?" John fretted, starting to head back out, but Gamzee stopped him.

"Don't get all up and worried." He gave a light smile, "That's just what happens when a motherfucker detoxes."

"Oh..." John looked down at his feet. "I...wanted to see if you wanted to play cards with us...but...I'm guessing not."

Gamzee gave a yawn, scratching at his messy hair, "Yeah, sorry brother, maybe tomorrow...them's got me all doped up, I'ma head back to bed now." He turned around and started back to his bed.

"Wait!" John called out, stopping him. He wasn't sure where he was getting this courage to actually talk to the boy, maybe it was hanging out with Dave? "Uhm...what are you detoxing from?"

"A whole lot of shit."

"Oh..."

Gamzee turned back to his bed again, peeling back his covers this time.

"Why do you do drugs?"

Gamzee looked up, locking gazes with him before his eyes flicked to the floor, "If I don't, I get at hurtin' the people I love." John looked down, then looked back up like he had something else to ask. "I killed some motherfuckers, okay? Sometimes I get my murder on, so you might not wanna try and be my friend, brother, cuz if you do, I'll go for you first."

 _He has got to be lying...right?_ John thought to himself.

* * *

"My nameth Tholluxth, and I'm bipolar." The newest member to the group sat cross legged in their small circle as they each went around and introduced themselves.

"Hi Tholluxth." They all said back.

He gave them a smile, "No, not Tholluxth, _Tholluxth.._ " He tried to correct them, but his lisp rendered it useless.

Karkat raised an eye and Gamzee gave him a lazy smile, "That's what we just said, brother..."

"I think he's trying to say 'Sollux,' with an 'S'." Rose chirped and Sollux gave her a smile and nodded.

Their eyes fell on Gamzee, the boy who had showed up about a week earlier. He had spent his first four days in the hospital running from his bed to the toilet, only ever venturing to the common room at meal times. Even then, he ate lightly and would immediately be sent running to get sick again. Dave had decided he was probably bulimic, but after these last couple days when he had been able to spend some time hanging out with the other kids, he really wasn't sure what the guy's problem was.

"My name's Gamzee," He gave a lazy blink and a smile, "I'm all here 'cause I killed some people and then got addicted to drugs. I was in motherfucking juvie, but when I went sober there I tried to off some brothers again." He shrugged, "Apparent, that shit don't fly."

Karkat and Sollux exchanged fearful glances at one another before they spoke up, "Are you gonna fucking kill us!?"

Gamzee smiled again with a light laugh, "I ain't all about murdering people when they ain't been at bothering me. Not to mention, this places' got me all doped the motherfuck up."

John looked down at the floor, already knowing the boys story, but Dave took that as him being afraid and put an arm around him, pulling him close. "Well, don't worry bro, we're pretty chill around here."

Jade gave him a happy smile, "Yeah, the last thing we'd want is to make someone mad enough to kill someone!"

* * *

Karkat's feet felt his way up the stairs, his hand sliding along the railing. "Are you sure this is such a smart idea?" He hissed up at the boy in front of him.

"I thwear, we'll be fine!" Sollux whispered back down as the two found their way to the top of the stairs. He wrapped his hand around the door knob and slowly gave it a push. He honestly wasn't expecting it to open so easily, but there they were, on the third floor.

Karkat fidgeted nervously, biting at his lower lip as they crept into the large hallway. "If we get in trouble, don't think I won't pin all this shit on you!" Sollux waved him off as he took to admiring the paintings and statues. Karkat wandered his way further down the hall, not as interested at what was on the wall as he was with what was at the end of the hallway. He found himself admiring a large glass case, it held shelves of photos of doctors and nurses and what looked like a group photo of previous patients. He stared at their faces, one particular face. A boy stood on the end, a nurse behind him with both hands on his shoulders. His arms were crossed and he had a look on his face that Karkat knew all too well, his nose stuck up in the air and his eyes closed as if he was just too good for his eyes to be in the picture.

Beside the glass case was a small table and large chair. The other side of the case had an exact copy of the table and the same chair, except red instead of green. There were hallways that branched from the end of this one, both heading opposite directions. One was dimly lit, the other contained a growing sound of footsteps. Karkat looked back down the original hall to see Sollux carefully admiring the handiwork of the creator of the sculptures. He looked back down the brightened hall, the footsteps growing closer still. The table on the side closest to the darkened hall held a newspaper, folded and neatly squared beneath a coffee mug. He picked up the cup, slipped the paper under his arm, and sprinted back to Sollux. "Hey asswipe, someone's coming!" He whispered hastily as he swung open the door. Sollux sighed as he stood up and followed Karkat out the door.

* * *

Karkat plopped down on his bed, flicking on the lights. "Urghh...turn that shit off..." Dave grumbled, pulling his pillow over his head. Karkat ignored him as he unfolded the newspaper. Since he'd been in the hospital, none of them had received any news about what was happening on the outside. Many days, they forgot what day it was, sometimes even what month. Time was a useless idea within those walls. The closest they got to understanding time was watching when the nurses began to switch shifts and the placement of the sun when lunch was served. He often wondered why they didn't have any clocks but never felt compelled enough to ask about it.

He looked at the date at the top of the newspaper, squinted, and looked again. September 13, 1989. "Dave, hey Dave, what's today's date?"

Dave gurgled, "I don't know, man...like June...something..."

"What's the year?"

"Dude have you lost it?"

"Just tell me what year it is, shitface!"

Dave sighed, "It's 2013, alright..." He tucked himself back under his pillow to block out the light and tried to go back to sleep.

If it was 2013, why was there a newspaper from 1989? Karkat flipped through the newspaper, skimming the headlines until he found something.

**Cherub Institute burns down in fire. No casualties. Hospital set to rebuild.**

Below the bolded words was the same group picture he had seen upstairs. Around 20 patients, surrounded by nurses, doctors, and staff members. All the staff looked the same as it was now, obviously not much had changed. The longer he looked at the patients, the more similarities he found. His eyes drifted back to the boy on the end again. He was short with black hair. He wore a red sweater as he looked away from the camera, his eyes closed and nose turned up to the sky.

"Dad..."

He stared at each of the patients individually. A few of them looked extremely familiar. A young girl with short black hair and glasses, a blonde girl with a scarf, a tall boy with messy hair and lazy eyes, a girl with a wicked smile and red glasses, a boy with a mischievous grin, his hands held up like guns, and the last he recognized was a boy with hair so long it covered both his eyes. There were many more patients, but one caught his eye. He slid from the bed, dropping onto the end of Dave's bed, sitting on his feet. "Fuck man, what do you-"

Karkat held the picture up, his finger pointing to a boy. "You know him?"

Dave blinked a few times, propping up to look at the picture. He snatched the paper from his hands, sitting up straight and tall as he thumbed over the boy's face. "...Bro?"

* * *

A/N: Fun fact: the date and month that were on the newspaper are the date and month of my birthday! :D

So the mysteries of the third floor are slowly being revealed, finally, I've been waiting to start writing about this part!

I successfully did a two character chapter this time! Hopefully, the rest will be two (or more) characters also until I get them all introduced and start with the real plot of what happens!

Also, I probably won't write Sollux's lisp into his words anymore after this chapter, that was just to sort of make a statement like "yes his lisp is still a thing" or whatever.

Here's Gamzee and Sollux's edits. Gamzee's shirt is a pot leaf to the best of my artistic abilities and Sollux's is ":):" which can look like a happy face or a sad face to represent his manic and depressive states due to his BD.

 


	10. Tavros' Arrival - updated 4/25/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Does Tavros Nitram count as one new patient or two?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **TRIGGER WARNING**  
>  This chapter features one-sided bro/dave and mentions of pedophilia. They are brief and do not go into detail so they are not tw'd in the chapter.

"Can you tell me where you are, Tavros?"

Tavros' eyes were stern and he sat up straight. "My name is Rufioh." He thought for a moment, "I'm at that big building downtown. Cherub Manor or something."

Doctor Boxcar smiled, "Institute, but good, except, your name is Tavros. Can you tell me that your self?"

Tavros shook his head, "Sometimes my name is Tavros. Right now my name is Rufioh."

Dr. Boxcar took a deep breath, "Rufioh is your father's name. Do you remember your father?"

Rufioh gave an exaggerated sigh, leaning back in his chair, "I told you – I don't have a father."

"You've never told me that. This is the first time we've met, Tavros."

Rufioh gritted his teeth, " _Please stop calling me that._ "

"I am not going to call you by your father's na-"

"I DON'T HAVE A FATHER, GODDAMNIT! I KILLED HIM. I SLIT HIS THROAT!" Rufioh shouted as he stood up, balling his fists.

Dr. Boxcar just blinked at him in silence before speaking, "Your father is not dead, he is perfectly fine. You did not slit his throat. Please take a moment to calm down and reconnect with reality, I have more questions. Please sit down."

Rufioh walked over to the opposite side of the office, leaning against the wall. "I don't want to sit. You can talk to me like this."

"Fine." The psychologist sighed and was growing agitated by the new boy, "Do you remember how you got here?"

"The police brought me here after I killed my dad. But you say that didn't happen. So tell me, Boxedcar, how did I get here?" Rufioh snapped at him, already not caring much for the man.

Dr Boxcar nodded, ignoring the misspeak of his name, "Correct, you did not kill your father so the police did not bring you here. You walked here yourself not ten minutes ago because," He opened up a notepad, flicking through the pages, "because "his voice was too loud for me to handle on my own." Do you remember saying that to Mrs. Questriant, the front desk worker, when you arrived?"

"I don't remember saying that, I don't remember no Mrs. Questriant, I remember police sirens and handcuffs." Rufioh said as he pushed off the wall and went to the small bookshelf, picking through the different psychologist books. "My other doctor told me I had D-I-D and that's why this stuff happens to me. He told me I would have to take a lot of medicine and constantly be watched and I'll never have a normal life. Is that why I'm here? Because I can't live with the rest of the population?"

Dr. Boxcar stuttered and began to flip through his paperwork again, "No, no, you're here so you can get better, Tavros."

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME THAT!" Rufioh screamed as he chucked a book across the room. Dr. Boxcar flinched away from it, grabbing at a small button under his desk. A few seconds later, two of the nurses from outside the office pushed through the door, grabbing him under the arms and holding him.

Dr. Boxcar adjusted his small hat and the collar of his shirt, "Are you going to be nice the rest of the session, or do you need to be calmed down?" Rufioh tried to pull out of their grip, spitting on one of the nurses. Dr. Boxcar gave them a curt nod and they escorted him from the office.

Rose looked up as a boy was removed from the office of the boy's psychologist. His deflated mohawk flopped lazily to one side and his arms pulled at the restraints. Two nurses carried the boy out of the common room and into the hallway. She wasn't sure where they were taking him, but she watched carefully as he was taken away. John sat down next to where she was curled up on the couch, reading. "What happened?" She shrugged. "Is that a new guy?"

"I would assume." Rose said quietly as she climbed to her knees, looking over the back of the couch as the boy disappeared from sight.

John smiled, "I wonder if he'll be my roommate?"

Rose shook her head, "With the way he was just escorted from his session on his first day here, I would assume he'll be under surveillance, at least tonight anyway. They might put him in solitary for the day. Are there any other boys not under constant watch?"

John thought for a moment, "I don't think Sollux is...Gamzee might be." Rose nodded and John guessed he probably wouldn't be his roommate. He was the first one to arrive and had been there for close to two months now, yet he still didn't have a roommate. At least, not an official one. Countless nights Dave would sneak into his room, just to cuddle or talk, sometimes just to get away from Karkat. John wished he and Dave could really be roommates, it would give them a lot more time to be alone together. He sighed, knowing that was probably the real reason they weren't roomies. There was no way Dave was seriously under watch, right? He didn't do anything. No outbursts and he never hurt anyone, not even himself. The most he did was talk to his imaginary doll friend, Carl or something.

Dave told him before that the small puppet-man would tell him to do bad things, but most of the time he didn't listen. The few times he did listen, very bad things would happen, and that's why he was under watch. John hoped that eventually Cal would stop saying bad things to Dave, or Dave could learn to never listen to him ever again, and then they could room together, and one day the two of them would get better and they could leave this place for good. John was only in there because his dad couldn't handle helping him with mental health issues, Rose because her mother wasn't capable. The two were sixteen and both knew that when they turned eighteen and were adults, and they were not dangers to society they could choose to leave if they wanted. Terezi and Sollux could probably make that decision too.

The others, he wasn't so sure about. Gamzee was a murderer, or at least that's what he said. He hadn't shown any signs of anger, let alone homicidal behavior, since he had shown up. But, as the boy had said himself, they had him 'all motherfuckin' doped up' and that could cloud John's judgement of him. Jade still had serious flashbacks that kept her from functioning for hours on end if she was brought into contact with a trigger or something that reminded her of that night, even the sight of older men had her hiding in corners and reduced to nothing but a ball of tears. Dave, as previously stated, didn't show any signs of hostility or danger but from some of the stories he had told John, he knew Dave wouldn't have the option to just leave whenever he wanted. Karkat had tried to smash his head through the window just three days prior to now, so there was no way he would be leaving any time soon.

They were all so different, so many different things that conflicted them but they had all wound up in his hospital together. It was strange and lonely at times, and being surrounded by disorder and sickness could never be good on someone so close to recovery such as John, but he liked all his new friends. Each and every one of them meant something special to him and the thought that more and more new friends would arrive was what kept him pushing forward.

* * *

A soft knock rapped at Dr. Boxcar's door. A different doctor, a small man with large eyes and a dark green hat answered the door. "Uh...is Dr. Boxcar here?"

The man shook his head, "I can take a message for him. My name is Dr. Die," He shook his head, "Please don't comment on the terrible nickname I ended up with. I, along with Dr. Boxcar and Dr. Eggs share this office for treatment of the male patients. If there's anything you would like me tell him, just let me know."

The boy fidgeted nervously, "Oh, okay...well, my name is Tavros. I spoke to him earlier when I first arrived but Rufioh wasn't in a great mood and I was told I threw something at him. I was going to apologize...could you just mention that to him?"

Dr. Die smiled, "Of course, you tell Rufioh that if you want to get any better, he needs to learn to control himself, okay?"

Tavros gave a light smile and a nod, "Thanks, uh, I'll tell him you said that!" With that, he turned away from the office and looked around the common room. A couch and a projector set up were situated in one area, another held small tables and board games spilled from the cabinets. There were close to ten other patients that roamed around the room. Some playing games with each other, some gathered on the couch as a movie played on the projector. One girl was actually asleep in a pile of games. One patient, a tall boy with dark hair, stood next to the window, one hand pressed against the glass.

Tavros made his way over to the boy, tapping his shoulder, "What are you, uh...doing?"

"I ain't doing nothing, 'cuz I can't do nothing." Gamzee turned to look down at the shorter boy, "At least not in this place I can't."

Tavros glanced around the room again, "I dunno, everyone else seems to be doing quite a bit."

Gamzee shook his head, "That's 'cuz they don't get what's really goin' on in this place, brother. They think they're here for gettin' better...motherfucker, I'm the only one who gets what's really been up and happening in this place."

Tavros shook his head, "I don't understand...what you're talking about..."

Gamzee snickered, "Of course you don't, motherfucker, I don't even understand." He ran one of his large hands through his messy, uncombed hair, before holding it out to Tavros. "My name's Gamzee. Who're you?"

"Tavros and Rufioh." Tavros introduced both of them as he gripped Gamzee hand and gave it a firm shake.

Gamzee's lips pulled back in a smile, "And? I only see one motherfucker so which one are you?"

"I'm both. Uh, right now I'm Tavros, but sometimes Rufioh." Tavros was hoping the larger boy would just accept it and not ask too many questions, but that was proving to be a worthless wish.

"How does your name all up and 'sometimes' change?" Gamzee turned back to the window, watching the birds land on the tall fence only to flap their wings again and fly off a different direction.

Tavros shrugged, "That's why I'm here. I have dissociative..., uh, you might know it better as multiple personality disorder." He tried to explain it as easily as he could without having to go into too much detail.

Gamzee nodded, "So is it just you and, what was the motherfucker's name, Ruffy?"

"Rufioh," Tavros corrected, "And yeah...it's just us two." He sighed as he crossed his arms and looked behind him, "I'm...gonna go talk to some of the other patients now. It was, uh, nice meeting you, Gamzee!" He gave a smile as he turned, but Gamzee caught his arm. He looked up at him for a moment before Gamzee let go, muttered a 'see ya' and turned back to his window again.

* * *

Karkat awoke with a scream, but his mouth was quickly covered. His eyes opened wide but all he saw was dark sunglasses covering his attacker's eyes. The figure put a finger to his lips before removing his hand. It was a tall man, he stood up straight and adjusted his hat. "Don't say anything." The man warned, pulling on the collar of his shirt, his eyes blinking from behind his pointed shades. "Just tell me where Dave Strider is."

Karkat gulped and looked at the bed next to him. It was empty, but that hardly mattered. His mind was racing, should he tell him where Dave was? Who was this guy? Was he going to hurt him if he didn't tell? "Who..." he whispered as quietly as he could, "are you?"

"That doesn't matter!" The man hissed, "I have to get Dave and get him out of here. He's my little brother and he doesn't belong in this place."

Karkat nodded slowly as he slipped from bed. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he tiptoed to the door. He glanced behind him to see the man following him. He could see the window against the back wall of room had been pushed open, a latter leaned against the wall. _This place can't even catch a shitty intruder like him?_ He opened the door to his room, checking down the hall before padding out, his bare feet cold against the floor and he shivered. When the man caught up, he pointed at the room next door. The man nodded at him, opening the door quickly and shutting it behind him.

He looked around the room. One bed was empty, but from the other he could hear light breathing. He knelled down next to the bed with his arm on the boy's shoulder. He gave him a shake. John rolled over and looked up at the man. He blinked his eyes a few times, still half asleep, "Who...?"

The voice wasn't what he was expecting and he stood up quickly, scanning the room for anyone else. He heard the sink in the bathroom running, just as he was about to knock on the door, the door to the room swung open.Three large, male nurses stormed the room, grabbing the man's arms, tackling him to the ground. John sat up quickly, in a panic he yelled out, thinking they were attacking Dave. Dave emerged from the bathroom, staring at the interaction. He couldn't see who they were tackling, but John looked scared and Karkat stood in the hallway. "He wanted to kidnap you, Dave..." He muttered out quietly before returning to his own room.

Dave took a step forward, trying to catch a glance between the men fighting to keep him down. "B...Bro? Bro is that you!?" Dave started to panic, Cal was dancing around the room, yelling about how he was about to die and it would be all Dave's fault. Dave screamed incoherently before one of the nurses let up on Bro and took to holding back Dave who was now fighting to get to his brother. John was backed against the wall, his knees tucked up to his chest. A few other patients had gathered in the hall to watch the ordeal unfold.

There was a lot to be seen, but the only noise was uncontrollable crying from all parties involved.

* * *

Bro opened his eyes, blinking around. He tried to move but his hands were bound behind him. He was in a very comfortable, large chair. He was sitting in a large, dimly lit office. The back of another chair could be seen from across the desk in front of him. He struggled to move, but his feet were tied to the legs of the chair. "What the fuck is going is on!?"

The chair in front of him swiveled around to reveal a man, close to the same age as himself. He had a shaved head and serious face. He pulled at his suspenders as he tilted his head to one side to stare at Bro, then tilted it to the other. "Dirk Strider..." He said quietly, "I haven't seen you since the fire...I thought-"

"I don't give a shit what you thought, Caliborn. I want my brother back." Bro grunted as he gave another useless pull at his bindings.

Caliborn took a deep breath, letting it drift from his nose. "Even if you escape from that chair, do you know how many guards I have? You won't be leaving until I say you can. Understood?"

"...understood." Bro's voice was far from pleasant as he growled out and stopped squirming. "I know what you're doing. Ever since the fire, you-"

"I've what?" Caliborn smiled as he stood from his chair, taking a walk around his office, he pulled back the large curtains from behind his window. The fence couldn't be seen from this high up, just the trees and the buildings from deeper into town. He let them fall back, swooshing down to block out any natural light, "I've rebuilt and taken in new children, more children who cannot function on their own and those who do not have family support to help them through recovery. Your brother is both, correct?"

"DON'T TALK ABOUT MY BROTHER!" Bro screamed again but it just made Caliborn smile brighter.

"That's why you brought him, yes? Because _you_ couldn't handle him, because _you_ didn't have anywhere to turn, because _you didn't want him anymore_." Caliborn sat back into his chair, ignoring Bro's continued yelling. "But that's not what this is about. Now you feel bad, you want him back, right?" Bro was silent. " _Right?_ "

Bro nodded slowly, gritting his teeth, "...right."

"But you can't have him back, not yet anyway! You're brother is very, very sick. He has improved drastically since his stay here. He has begun new medicine and learned new techniques to ignore his hallucinations. We don't have the scientific ability to completely cure him of his disorder, but we can make it bearable for him. That's what you want right? For him to be able to function in society even when he is old enough to move out of your apartment?"

"He wasn't going to move out..."

Caliborn smiled again, "Of course he was, Dirk. You didn't think he would live with his older brother for his entire life, did you?" He leaned forward, propping his arms on the desk, "Did you think you two were _in love_?" He leaned back, laughing as his head fell back against the chair, "He didnt love you! At least not like that! And besides, you didn't really love him. What happened to the boy from your stay? The one you were going to run away with and start a family with?"

Bro's voice hitched in his throat at the memories. They were eightteen. They were the only two in the adult ward at the time and when they could, they'd sneak off together. Sometimes they'd just sit and talk for hours, other times they wouldn't say a word. "You _know_ what happened to Jake."

Caliborn's laughter erupted again, spinning around in his chair. "Ahh, yes! That takes us back to: _the fire._ We just keep coming back to that, don't we, _old friend_?"

"I am not your friend." Bro hissed at him. "Besides. I'm done with this conversation.

Caliborn let out a deep breath as he stood back up again, "So am I." He walked around the desk, standing in front of the blond man, his arms crossed. "If I let you go, you have three options. I can hospitalize you because clearly you haven't overcome your original disorder. Yes, I can hospitalize you for further treatment of that, or I can call the cops because you are trespassing on personal property and you have broken and entered and maybe I could mention you were planning to kidnap a patient from a mental ward. But I would guess the last option is the best for you. You leave these grounds and never come back until you get a polite phone call informing you of your brother's release."

Bro gritted his teeth. "Hospitalize me."

Caliborn smiled, "I thought you might say that. I hope you don't mind, I've taken the oppurtunity to write up your paperwork. You are being taken in for..." he picked up a pack of papers from behind him and flicked through them, "...attempted murder of several patients and staff members and you are still extremely homicidal and violent." He smiled, "It wouldn't be safe to leave you with the other patients, besides, after what you said a few minutes ago, you are a confirmed pedophile and there's no way I can allow you to be alone with the children." He opened the door of his office, calling for the guards.

A few larger men, different that any of the previous nurses that the patients had seen, entered the room. Caliborn sat back in his chair, "Please take Mr. Strider down to solitary confiment and make him comfortable. He won't be leaving there for a long, long time."

* * *

A/N: Oh god I had far too much fun writing this chapter. First Tav's DID and then the gamtav moment and then writing the whole part with Bro I just...oh god. I was supposed to introduce Aradia in this chapter too but I didn't...whoops.

So yeah, I'm really trying to do some foreshadowing of what the hell is really happening and trying to give tiny hints about shit without straight up being like "this is what happened!" and god its so difficult...!!! I just want to write the entire thing in one night so I hurry up and get to the good part!!!

@that one guest commenter: Thank you for the help with Karkat! I'll add those to my notes! C: and don't worry, this story is FAR from over! Currently, I'm estimating close to 20 chapters!

Anyway...here's Tavros' edit, his shirt is sorta hard to see around his jacket, but its supposed to be those theater masks, where one is smiling and one is frowning or whatever to represent his two alters! This is before he's disabled (for now), so no wheelchair and also no robo-legs I just couldn't find a sprite of him without robo legs or a wheelchair.


	11. Aradia and Kanaya's Arrivals - updated 4/26/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aradia Megido is a ghost and Kanaya Maryam is a vampire? Is this a hospital or an episode of goddamned Supernatural!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read the new disclaimer chapter, its been altered uwu and if you have hate, send it to me via personal message or comment asking for somewhere to contact me if you wish to talk. I don’t want all this drama on my fanfic so let’s all be civilized and do it somewhere that everyone else doesn’t have to read our bickering, okay? Please and thank you :3  
> Update 4/26/16: nah fuck it keep ur hate to ur self lmao if u direct ur attention to the top left corner u can go back and save ur salty ass from wasting time on me cuz Im not even gonna read that shit anymore.  
>  **TRIGGER WARNING**  
>  Major tw for dissociation/depersonalization/derealization pretty much any time Gamzee opens his mouth.

Gamzee looked around his room, his roommate Tavros/Rufioh was nowhere to be seen. He shrugged as he went into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. He pulled off his shirt and leaned against the wall, sliding down into a sitting position. He reached his hand into his pocket, pulling out four small pills. He was supposed to take them everyday in the morning, but they didn’t check if you swallowed so he had been saving them. His fists tightened a few times, his mind racing.

He couldn’t believe he was the only one who had figured it out. He couldn’t believe he was the only one who knew. He had to tell someone, he couldn’t keep all this to himself. He tossed all four of the pills to the back of his throat, unknowing of how he’d react to taking four days worth of medicine in one night, but honestly he didn’t care. He swallowed them before standing, stripping off the rest of his clothes, and sliding into the shower.

As the water poured down onto his head and cascaded over his shoulders, he started to wobble. He pressed a hand against the wall for support, but it didn’t last very long before he slipped to the floor of the shower. He leaned against the wall, coughing and gagging, but the position he was in made vomiting a little difficult. He gripped at the soap holder, pulling himself up only to crash to the floor again. He reached his hand to the back of his head just as the door to the bathroom swung open. He expected to see a nurse, but with the blur of the shower curtain blocking his view, he wasn’t sure who it was.

"Gamzee!" A voice shouted as they entered the bathroom, he heard whoever it was shut the door behind them. He awkwardly peeked around the curtain and Gamzee quickly recognized the fluffy mohawk and tan skin as Tavros pulling the curtain back. He bent down, reaching out for his hands.

"Are you okay?" Tavros asked. Gamzee shook his head, taking his hands as Tavros pulled him up. They stumbled out of the water, Gamzee draped over the smaller boy as Tavros struggled to hold him up. Gamzee mumbled something into his shoulder. “What was that?"

"I want out of here…" Gamzee whispered again.

Tavros lifted his chin to look at him, “You’ll get out, you just gotta get better first and then you can go home! Besides, the hospital isn’t that bad, is it?"

Gamzee shook his head, “I don’t want out of the hospital…I want  _out of his head._ ”

* * *

"So who are you?" Sollux lisped out as the growing group of patients each introduced themselves to the new girl.

She had long, dark red, curly hair and her skirt hung to just above the floor. Her eyes looked panicked as she glanced from person to person and took a step back, saying, “Who…who are you all? How can you see me?"

Terezi cocked her head to the side, “Guys, is there a reason you shouldn’t be able to see her or…?"

Karkat shook his head, “No, we can see her just fine. She’s just crazy. Come on, lets just leave her alone." He turned around and headed away from her. Terezi shrugged and followed after him. Everyone else pressed on, trying to at least get her name but she wouldn’t hear of it, insisting that they shouldn’t be able to see her. As time passed, the group thinned out, going their separate ways until it was just the girl and Sollux.

Sollux sighed as he shoved his hands in his pockets, “I’m not really sure how we can see you or why we shouldn’t be able to, but you don’t need to be afraid of us. We’re all friends here, okay?" He turned around and started off to join some of the others in a game of Uno. The girl caught his arm and he stopped. He looked back, his glasses slipping down his nose and he raised his eyebrows at her.

"M…my name is Aradia." She looked around from side to side as her voice dropped to a whisper. “I’m dead. I shouldn’t be here and you shouldn’t see me. Because I’m dead. How can you see me?"

Sollux smiled lightly as he turned back around to face her and she let her hand slide from his arm, he caught her hand and gave it a squeeze. “You aren’t dead. That’s why we can see you, that's why I can touch you and you can touch me."

Aradia furrowed her eyebrows, trying to understand. “I…I died. In a car crash, I remember it!" She yanked her hand away. “Who are you to tell me if I’m alive or not?"

Sollux shrugged, “I’m no one important really, but I know when people are dead and when they aren’t. You don’t smell dead or look dead or sound dead – no, you’re definitely alive."

Aradia took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as she took another step back, “No…no no no…I was in the car with my mom two years ago and we hit a tree and the car was totaled and I died!"

Sollux shook his head, “You’re confused. Do you want me to get a doctor? I’m sure they can exp-"

"NO! I don’t need a doctor…doctor’s can’t help you once you’re already dead. Stop telling me I’m not dead. I’m dead, okay? I’m dead!"

Sollux blinked slowly, “Maybe you are dead, maybe you did die in a car crash. If so, why are you here?"

"I…I don’t know…"

"Are you haunting me?"

She shook her head, “I don’t think so…why would I?"

He shrugged again, “Well, regardless of if you’re dead or not, we can see you. So why don’t you make friends?"

She shook her head again, with more enthusiasm, “I can’t make friends…I shouldn’t talk to the living…I’m-I’m dead…"

"I understand that. I jus-" Someone laid a hand on Sollux’s shoulder and he turned around to see a man in a black suit and hat.

"It’s alright Sollux, let me talk to her." The man stepped around him, pushing Sollux back a few steps but he kept close, watching the interaction. “Do you know my name?"

"You can’t see me if I don’t want you to!" Aradia yelled, her hands covering her eyes as she whispered to herself quietly. She peeked out between her fingers, “You can’t see me anymore, right?"

The man reached out to take her hands away from her face, “Aradia, my name is Doctor Spades. You are not dead and I can see you very clearly right now."

Aradia yanked her hands away from his, “SHUT UP!" She screamed, “I-I’m dead, me and my mother were in a car and we drove off a bridge and I died…everyone died, my mother died and I died and my dad died and everyone is dead…"

Sollux stepped forward, “I thought you hit a tree?"

"We did. We hit a tree and it caused us to go off a bridge."

Dr. Spades shook his head at Sollux, “Please, let me handle this." Sollux nodded and stepped back again as Dr. Spades knelled down so he was smaller than her. “Aradia, you are not dead. Do you know why you’re here?"

"I’m here to haunt this evil place."

"No, Aradia, you are here because you walked into traffic saying that cars couldn’t run over a ghost. Do you know you are not a ghost?"

"I’m dead but people can see me so I must be a ghost. If I jumped out that window it wouldn’t hurt me, you know? If I went into the kitchen and slit my wrists no blood would poor out. If I carved open your chest, Dr. Spades, it wouldn’t even affect you because I know that you’re dead too." Aradia’s face held a solemn expression, no emotions passed through it as Dr. Spades stood up, took a deep breath, and patted her shoulder as he walked away.

"We’ll continue this in your actual session, alright?"

Sollux stared at Aradia in silence for a moment before stepping forward again and reaching out for her hand. She pulled away for a moment before letting him take it. “Aradia, I don’t care if you’re dead or if I’m dead or who ever else is dead, you can still be happy in the afterlife, right?" She blinked at him a few times before he tugged her over to the group playing cards, “Just…don’t hurt yourself, alright?" She blinked a few more times before nodding at him. He sat down and patted for her to sit next to him. She sat more behind him than beside him as she peeked around his shoulders at the others. “This is Aradia and she’s dead."

Karkat rolled his eyes, “Oh for the love of-"

Terezi elbowed him in the side, “Hi Aradia!"

Aradia leaned forward again, this time speaking aloud to the group. "W-well I'm actually here for schizotypal personality disorder."

Rose smiled, “It’s nice to meet you."

A few of the others all gave her polite hello’s and smiles, but she kept her same, serious face as she glanced around at each of them, still not speaking. She leaned forward and whispered into Sollux’s ear. He smiled a little, “She says its nice to meet you."

"Goddamnit, is she a fucking mute too!?" Karkat gritted his teeth only to be slapped in the back of the head by Gamzee.

"If the little motherfucker ain’t feelin’ like talking to no one but lisp-brother, who cares?" Gamzee gave a lazy smile at Aradia and Tavros looked up from where his head was resting on Gamzee’s shoulder to give a light wave, “Nice to all get at meetin’ you."

Aradia nodded her head at Gamzee and Tavros before leaning forward again to whisper in Sollux’s ear. “She says she isn’t mute, she’s just shy." Aradia nodded her head again, still barely peeking around Sollux’s shoulders. He smiled, “Oh and Dave, you have ‘uno’ and didn’t call it." He pointed out as he pushed the pile of cards in the middle towards the blond boy.

"Shit…"

* * *

"Are you asswipes fucking  _kidding me?_ ”

Karkat’s head dropped onto the table and Terezi snickered at him, “Calm down, KK, what’s the big deal?"

"First we get Ghost Girl over here and now fucking Dracula’s here? Is this a hospital or an episode of goddamned Supernatural!?" Karkat didn’t even lift his head as he groaned.

A new girl stood near the group, her arms folded and she rolled her eyes, “If you don’t be quiet, you’ll be the first I drain."

Karkat rolled his eyes, “Oh I’m so fucking scared, you’re going to attempt to bite me with your dull-ass human teeth since you’re a goddamned human and don’t actually have vampire teeth."

The new girl raised an eyebrow and opened her mouth lightly, revealing her pointed canine teeth. She poked one with her finger, watching it make an indent in her skin and slowly fade to normal again.

"Shit…" Dave mumbled to himself as he watched her. Tavros made an unintelligent noise and looked up at Gamzee who just shrugged.

John smiled awkwardly, “A-are those, uh, sharpened or something…?"

She shook her head, “I am a vampire so I was born with them."

Karkat looked up to see what the big deal was, “And by born with them, you mean the original teeth, right? And then you got some guy to file those fuckers into points, right?"

She smiled a bit and shook her head, “No, I mean I was born with them li-" She cut herself off and looked at the blonde girl who hadn’t said anything but kept staring at her. “Are you alright?"

Rose just stared at the girl. Her hair, her outfit, her face, her makeup. She just stared at it all.  _She’s so cool._  "Oh – I’m fine, my name is Rose. I like your teeth."  _I like your teeth? What the hell was that?_ "I mean your clothes. But your teeth are pretty cool too."  _I swear to god if you ask to touch them I will-_ "Can I touch them?"  _You motherfucker._

The girl smiled at her and laughed lightly, “My name is Kanaya, but I don’t think you would want to touch them. With flesh so close, I may not be able to control the bloodlust."  _What do you mean, bloodlust?_ "Not that I would want to bite you or anything."  _That sounded quite condescending, now she may think there is something that causes you to not want to bite her._ "Not that I wouldn’t enjoy to bite you and-"  _Not talking would be a very wise move right now._ "My name is Kanaya."

Rose smiled nervously, “You mentioned that."

Kanaya nodded her head and the two grew quiet for a moment before she looked around, “Where did all of your friends go?" Rose shrugged and Kanaya looked at her feet.

* * *

John raised an eyebrow, “I don’t understand, why do you want to tell me this?"

Gamzee breathed out slowly, “You were the first motherfucker here, I need to know everything I can to make sure I’m all right about this shit."

"What ‘shit’ are you making sure you’re right about?" John pressed on, still confused.

Gamzee shook his head, “I can’t tell you, brother, you’ll think I’m crazy."

John stared at him, “My boyfriend had a twenty minute conversation with a small puppet that only he can see and yours has conversations with his other personality, I’m hardly buying into how anything can sound ‘crazy’ anymore."

Gamzee smiled at him, “You’re awfully comfortable for a boy hospitalized for anxiety, motherfucker."

John looked down, “You aren’t my father…so I’m okay, mostly." He looked up and gave a light smile, “Uh, care to explain now?"

Gamzee stood up, pacing back and forth, “Just…okay. I’ll tell you what I think is all going on but you gotta swear, motherfuckin’ swear on your life, you won’t be at tellin’ anyone else."

"I swear, I swear. Just please explain what’s going on here!"

Gamzee sat back down and bit his lip for a moment, “You know that picture that Karbro found a while back, looked like it had all our parents in it?" John nodded and Gamzee kept on, “I-I think that fire it was talkin’ about…I think some real shit happened because of it."

John shook his head, “Yeah, of course it did. It burnt down an entire building but no one was hurt so-"

"Exactly. How the motherfuck does an entire three-story institution with over 20 people inside burn down and everyone is out safe before even the motherfuckin’ fire department shows?"

John bit the inside of his cheek. “I don’t know, maybe everyone was downstairs at the time."

Gamzee shook his head. “Nah, everyone would’ve been on the third floor at the time of the fire, motherfucker. The building used to be different. Commons was upstairs and the rooms were on the bottom floor. Shit burnt down in the middle of the day. There was just one staircase at the back of the building – no fire escapes either, brother."

"I…I don’t understand, how do you know all this?" John was really trying to follow him, but nothing the guy said made sense.

Gamzee smiled, “See, that’s where it gets all motherfuckin’ interesting. It don’t matter how I know – but as long as I know, that means it happened." John just grew more and more confused and it just caused Gamzee’s smile to widen, “See, we’re just puppets in this dark carnival, just his motherfuckin’ play things. If you died right now – no one would even remember you, brother. You know why?" John was silent and Gamzee’s head ticked to the side, “I asked do you know why?" John shook his head more of out of fear than curiosity, “Because your parents don’t exist, motherfucker. No one does. Not any of us, none of our relatives. There ain’t but one person livin’ in this place. And I’m the only one who can help him, now are you gonna join me or what?"

John stood up slowly, shaking his head, “I-I know what I said about nothing sounding crazy anymore but…I’m sorry, I’m just going to go now. I…I hope you’re alright." He turned around, looking back at him for a moment before hurrying off.

Gamzee shook his head and looked up at the ceiling, “I know you can hear me. You got yourself and everyone else fooled but brother you better stop all that noise with me."

* * *

Gamzee opened his eyes slowly and looked around him.  _Where am I?_  He blinked a few times and tried to remember what happened. He had been talking to John, he confided in him, he thought he could trust the boy…but he had ratted him out to a doctor. Now he was in this small, white room, nothing but a single door. Padded walls was something that had long been out of style and straight jackets were something you saw magicians in Las Vegas use, not something in psychiatric hospitals. Small, white rooms to help you ‘reflect on your thoughts,’ was still definitely a thing they used, especially for Gamzee. He had grown quite used to being locked in them, never for very long, just enough to calm down.

He heard someone move in the room next to him and knocked on the wall. He waited a moment for someone to knock back. “Motherfucker, who is you? Everyone’s in the common room, did I all up and forget some brother?"

The other room’s occupant let out a grown before talking back, “I’nt know…can’t…'member…" The voice slurred its words and Gamzee had trouble picking apart what they were saying.

"You all hurt over there?"

They stuttered out a ‘no’ and the two fell quiet for a moment before the voice could speak a little better, “Been here…a while…Dave…is Dave…okay?"

"Dave’s fine, how do you all know him?"

Another patch of silence before he spoke, “D-Dirk Strider…I’m his brother…Cali…Caliborn put me here…been here…a while…Dave…is Dave…okay?"

"You already asked that, motherfucker, I done told you he’s fine." Gamzee gritted his teeth, “If you all is Dave’s bro, why’re you here? Didn’t you die in the motherfucking fire like the rest of them?"

"I don’t know…" Bro croaked, “That day…something weird happened…I remember dying…but I remember living…what…what happened?"

Gamzee was quiet for a moment, “Listen to me. Are you all motherfuckin’ listening carefully?" Bro groaned a yes. “Look on the floor. There’s a gun."

Bro squinted his eyes, “There ain’t no gun."

Gamzee took a deep breath, “Just believe there’s a gun and it’ll all be there. Okay, are you believing there’s a fucking gun?"

"I can’t believe…there’s a gun here…if there ain’t a gun."

"Stop motherfuckin’ thinkin’ so much. There’s a gun. It’s right by your left foot, brother, do you see it?" Bro was silent. “It’s small, I don’t know shit about gun types but it’s something small and its black. Is it there?" Silence. “Look, when you see the gun, you need to-"

A gun shot rang through the hallway and echoed in each and every cell, easily fading through the paper-thin walls.

The door to Gamzee’s cell opened and a man stood in the doorway, “Have you calmed down, Mr. Makara?"

Gamzee stood up, “Yeah, calm as a motherfuckin’ cucumber."

"Good." The man didn’t speak again as he lead Gamzee from his room and into the small hallway. Gamzee looked into the empty cells around his, all empty, including the one right next to his own. Of course, why wouldn’t it be? He was the only one locked up, right?

* * *

 A/N: I finally pushed myself through yet another chapter!!! (:

I’m really trying not to let all this drama get me down and I’m just going to keep writing because that’s what I love to do and I really like writing this fic and if you have a problem with it then just don’t read it uwu

I’m really digging all this foreshadowing/not telling you all whats going on/making you squirm in confusion thing lol you guys should comment with your theories on what’s going on or something! ^^ I’d like to hear your thoughts on what may or may not be happening!

Wow there was a lot of Gamzee in this chapter okay that’s cool lol

Here’s the edits for this chapter: Aradia’s symbol is actually something I think means ‘toxic’ or something? I’m really not sure, I googled her disorder “cotard’s syndrome" and looked in the images and it was one of the first things I saw lmao not to mention I was originally gonna make her like believe she was sort of a zombie (since it’s also called Walking Dead Syndrome) but I thought ghost fit better and I didn’t feel like changing her shirt so yeah uwu and then there’s Kanaya who believes herself to be a vampire (I couldn’t find a disorder to fit with this aside from ‘clinical vampirsm’ which it’s considered a mental disorder but it’s the closest thing I could find – not including windigo psychosis which will appear later – so we’ll go with ‘clinical vampirsm’ as her disorder!) and her shirt shows a poorly drawn mouth with fangs poking out!


	12. Vriska and Nepeta's Arrivals - updated 4/26/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You guys didn’t honestly think she was here _just_ because she can smell colors, did you? Also welcome our Cluster B Cuties, Nepeta Leijon and Vriska Serket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning: This chapter is by far the sappiest, shippy chapter so far to appear in this fic. I am sincerely sorry.

Terezi heard her door close as she slid off her pants, stretching her arms above her head and letting out a yawn.

"Are those  _dragons_  on your  _boxers_?" A condescending voice said from behind her.

Terezi sighed, “Vriska, we’ve been over this. I wear boxers to sleep – its not a big deal."

Vriska rolled her eyes, “Yeah, but  _dragons_? Come on Terezi, don’t you ever want to feel just a little bit feminine?"

Terezi turned to her, arms crossed. “Can’t you just leave me alone for like, one night, Serket?"

Vriska smiled. “No, I’m pretty sure I was sent to room with you purely so I can help you. You’re blind so that’s why none of your clothes match and you always look like shit, so you need someone like me to help, right?"

" _Fuckin rude,_ for one. Also if I needed fashion advice, I’d ask John before I ever even stooped to asking  _you._ ”

"Oooh, someone’s not in a great mood tonight, huh? You wanna talk about it?"

"No." The two sat on their own beds in silence for a good five minutes before Terezi face planted into her pillow. “Did you know Karkat  _still_  gets in bed with Dave sometimes?"

Vriska raised an eyebrow, “So what?" She shrugged. “You know he doesn’t like him."

Terezi took in a deep breath and let it out slowly as she flipped onto her back, staring into the emptiness that was the ceiling. “Yeah but when’s the last time he snuck in bed with me? Or tried to cuddle with me? Or anything like that?"

"Terezi, I’m pretty sure you two have never done anything like that."

"Exactly! He’s always stuck up John and Dave’s asses and he doesn’t want anything to do with me until they’re busy sucking face somewhere. Then he has the  _nerve_  to say things like “You know you’re the only girl I’ve ever loved, right?" or “When I’m with you, I don’t mind being alive" or some other thing that’s not quite as sappy and filled with his weird vocabulary but I know he’s trying really hard when he says that stuff but then… I don’t know."

Vriska let out a heavy sigh as she shook her head, moving from her own bed to sit at the end of Terezi’s. “You’re too nice to the boy, TZ, always kissing his cuts and saying you’ll be there for him. He’s taking advantage of you." She smirked. “And just so you know, he really isn’t much to look at either."

Terezi sniffled through a smile as she sat up and looked up at Vriska. “So…what do I do?"

"Leave that to me!"

* * *

Snowman glared down at Vriska right as she rolled her eyes at the older woman.

"You wanted to speak to me?" Snowman asked, her voice devoid of any emotion.

"Well, I’ve been her for like a week and you haven’t bothered with me once." Vriska said.

"And you feel you’re that important?"

Vriska smiled as she shrugged, leaning back into the couch. “Aren’t I the most important person in this damn place?"

"A bit full of yourself, aren’t you?"

Vriska shook her head. “I wouldn’t say that, I’m just very confident."

"Confident, huh?" Snowman leafed through some papers, pulling out a picture and dropping it on Vriska’s lap. “Is that why he’s in the hospital?"

Vriska looked down at the boy, smirking at his his awkward smile and dark mohawk and shabby clothes. “He deserved it."

Snowman narrowed her eyes."You were only here for two days before you beat the boy’s legs into mush with the TV."

"I told you, he deserved it." Vriska smiled. “So, doc, what did they say I was here for?"

"Narcissistic and antisocial personality disorders with violent tendencies."

Vriska laughed. “Ah, yeah, that’s right! Apparently I think I’m better than everyone, right? Is that what that means?"

Snowman nodded her head. “That’s one way to put it, but that really isn’t the reason you’re here. The violence is more of the reason for you being here, you understand that right?"

Vriska waved her off."Yeah, yeah, whatever. So when people question my power, I fight them and, what a surprise, I always win!"

Snowman shook her head, “You don’t have any ‘power,’ you’re a sixteen year old girl, the most power you have is what movie you see on a Saturday night."

Vriska leaned forward and smirked, “See, that’s where you’re wrong! One day, I will be in charge of you, and everyone in this hospital, and everyone outside of this hospital too. One day, I’ll be in charge of everything and there won’t be anything you can do about it!" She leaned back, folding her arms behind her head, one leg crossed over the other as she began to hum.

"What are you singing?"

"The last song you’ll hear before I kill you."

* * *

"TZ, you’re roommate has fucking lost it." Dave commented as the group watched the newest patient being dragged from her therapy session and taken down the hall.

Terezi shrugged. “Yeah, last night she was trying to tell me I should…" Her voice faltered and she shook her head.

"What did she want you to do?" Karkat asked from beside her as he tossed another card into the pile between the group.

"It’s nothing, it was just dumb and I said no."

Gamzee tossed a card on the pile, “Can we all change the motherfucking subject from that bitch?"

John nodded, “Yeah, Vriska is a pretty tough subject for him, you guys!"

"If you do not mind me asking, what did Tavros do to anger her so much?" Kanaya asked quietly.

Gamzee shrugged and the group grew quiet.

"Aradia says they were arguing," Sollux tossed into the conversation, “She didn’t hear much, but it seemed like it was Rufioh, not Tavros." Aradia nodded along with what he said and Gamzee shrugged.

"I just hope that motherfucker’s okay…"

The group was silent for a few more moments aside from the sound of cards dropping onto the pile.

"Hey, has anyone seen Jade?" Dave asked after a few minutes, causing everyone to look around.

Rose shrugged. “This morning she said she wasn’t getting out of bed. I don’t know why."

Dave bit his lip, “I’m gonna go check on her, aight?"

Everyone gave a nod as he dropped his cards down and made his way to the stairs, completely bypassing the nurses who barely even noticed as he went up to the second floor. He knocked on the door to Rose and Jade’s room, but no noise came from within. He pushed it open lightly and he saw the figure in Jade’s bed curl in on itself as if she could hide from him. 

"Hey Jade?" Dave asked. She didn’t respond. Dave quietly shut the door behind him as he made his way deeper into the room. He knew if he was caught in one of the girls rooms he would be in huge trouble, but he was worried about his friend. For a few weeks now, she had been extremely quiet and reserved and it had been days since he saw her smile. “Jade, you alright?"

"What do you want…?" Jade mumbled, pulling the covers over her head.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay. Are you sick?"

"Yeah…"

"What hurts, I’ll get one of the nurses."

"Nurses can’t fix me, Dave…I'm broken..."

Dave stared down at his feet, he could hear the tears in her voice as it hitched at every syllable. “Broken?"

Jade rolled onto her other side and peeked out from her blanket at the blond boy. “Yeah… if I tell you something, will you promise not to tell anyone?"

"Promise."

"Pinky promise?"

"Pinky promise."

Jade reached a hand out and Dave linked pinkies with her and she pulled the blanket from her face as she sat up on the bed, holding her knees to her chest. "You, and John, and Rose, and everyone else...everyone's falling in love...and kissing each other...and making plans for when they leave. It all feels so weird to me...I don't think I was always like this...just after what happened. I don't feel like I could ever like someone the way you all like each other. I don't want to kiss people or share a bed...I just...I just want to be happy and have friends...is something wrong with me?

Dave thought for a few moments. “Jade, you’re too good to find love in a place like this. When you get out, you’ll have a great survival story and they’ll be a great partner out there who will love yo-"

Jade shook her head, "No, Dave, I don't want someone here or out there. Is that so wrong? To be happy just single and not feeling any attraction at all?"

Dave nodded and smiled, "Jade, if that's what makes you happy then you don't need to do anything else."

Jade closed her eyes for a moment before lunging forward and wrapping her arms around Dave, hiding her face in his neck. “Th-thanks Dave…"

Dave smiled, “No problem."

* * *

"You gonna eat anything?" Jade asked as she sat across the table from the newest member of their group.

The girl picked at her plate. “It’s animals though!" She pushed the tray away from her as she folded her arms and rested her head on them, “Animals didn’t do anything to us!"

Dave shrugged as he reached over, stabbing one of her chicken nuggets with his fork, but John knocked it off. “What? She’s not gonna eat it!" John stared at him and shook his head.

"You have fruit too," John pointed out to her.

"I don’t eat fruit either!" She sighed. “I only eat people…"

"Uh, yeah, but they aren’t going to let you eat people in here, Nepeta." John pointed out casually.

Nepeta huffed. “I know… but animals don’t do anything, so we shouldn’t eat them. And plants don’t do anything either…people are the only bad things in the world, so I eat them instead!"

Terezi smiled as she nudged Nepeta with her elbow, “You wouldn’t eat me, right?"

Nepeta purred as she smiled, “AC would nefur eat GC!"

"What the fuck does ‘AC’ mean? And who’s ‘GC’?" Karkat asked as he picked at his own food.

Nepeta shrugged as she stabbed all of her chicken nuggets and dropped them onto Dave’s plate. Dave grinned and whispered a ‘fuck yeah’ as he ate her food. “That’s our roleplaying names, silly!"

Karkat rolled his eyes as Terezi turned to him, “Yeah, we picked out these cool names! I’m ‘gallows calibrator,’ cool, huh?" Karkat shook his head and Terezi frowned. “You wouldn’t understand anyway!"

Karkat raised an eyebrow, “What does that mean? Why the fuck wouldn’t I understand your shitty ass roleplaying?"

"It isn’t shitty, Karkat! It’s something I like to do, okay, why are you always such a dick to me?"

Karkat scoffed. “I’m not a ‘dick’ to you, you’re just weird sometimes."

"I wasn’t weird the other day when my hand was down your pants."

"Would you just shut up already?"

"No! V-Vriska was right! I’m never going to be good enough, for you, am I? What do I have to do for you to appreciate me?"

Karkat rolled his eyes, “Terezi, will you just calm down? I’m not mad at you or any-"

"Do you think I care if you’re mad or not? You don’t have any reason to be mad – I have all the reason to be mad, so I am!" She reached across the table to grab a fork, “Maybe you’ll treat me better if I act like you do, huh? Will that make me more important to you?" She dug the prongs of the fork into her skin, scratching up her forearm, leaving red marks behind. “If I cut myself and act like a big depressing douche-bag all the time, will you care about me more than  _him_?" She rubbed the fork at her skin, up and down, pushing down deeper until she could feel some of the skin begin to peel back. By this time, tears were streaming from her eyes and nurses had taken notice. One of them pulled the fork from her hands, another restrained her hands behind her. She screamed and kicked as they pulled her onto the ground. “WHY WON’T YOU JUST LOVE ME?" She screamed over and over as another nurse appeared with a needle, giving her a shot just below her lower back.

Karkat looked at the others and they all just stared at him in confusion. “What the shitting did I do…?" Everyone just shook their heads, eyes flicking from Terezi to him.

Vriska, who had been sitting at a different table by herself, sauntered over to lean on the end of the table. “You guys didn’t honestly think she was here  _just_   because she can smell colors, did you?" She snickered, “Karkat, don’t get a big head and think you’re the first guy to get her to act this way."

* * *

Tavros opened his eyes slowly and blinked around the large office.  _Where…?_ He tried to remember how he had gotten here, but all he could remember was when he had been in the hospital, not Cherub Institute, a different hospital, a normal one. He had been there because something happened to his legs.

His legs.

He looked down but his knees ended in stubs. His hands felt wheels next to him and it took him a moment to process before he realized he was in a wheelchair. His legs had been amputated.  _Why…are my legs…gone?_  He tried to think back but he couldn’t even recall why he had been taken to the other hospital in the first place. Had he fallen and done something to his legs?

His hands felt onto the wheel and he moved them slightly, rolling him back some and then forward. “Hello?" He called out into the dark room before he noticed the chair across from the desk turned around and a woman smiled at him. She had white, curly hair and a big, happy smile.

"You’re awake! How are you, Tavros? Or are you Rufioh? Hmm?"

"I, uh…I’m Tavros… who are you? Where am I?"

She smiled and extended a hand to him, “I’m Calliope!" He slowly took her hand and gave it a light shake, “You’re in my office on the third floor of the hospital!"

"Oh, uh…do you know what happened to my legs?" Tavros let go of her hand and it returned instinctively to the wheel next to him.

"Hmm, I think my brother told me you were in a fight with another patient! Are you feeling okay?" Calliope smiled as she stood from her chair, pulling open the curtains on the window behind her desk, “Tsk, he always closes my curtains when he’s in here! I’m going to have to get on to him, won’t I?"

"Uh…I-I guess…" With the room now lit up from the light streaming in from the large window, Tavros looked around the office. There were hand drawn pictures covering the walls, they were all very good. “Is that me?" He asked as he rolled himself over to one of them. He looked up at the picture of the boy who looked like him, but his hair was tipped red.

Calliope poured herself a cup of hot water, dunking a teabag into it a few times and stirring in some sugar. She made two cups, sitting one on the opposite side of her desk for Tavros. “No, no, that’s your father, when he was younger!"

"Oh…oh yeah, that’s pretty obvious." Tavros rolled down the wall, looking at each of the pictures, one by one.

Calliope blew on her cup slowly as she took a sip and made her way to the opposite wall of Tavros, “The pictures of you and your friends are over here!"

Tavros turned around slowly, still getting the hang of the wheeled device as he rolled over to the wall next to the white haired woman. There were pictures, in order of how they appeared, in a straight line down the wall. John, Rose, Dave, Jade, Karkat, Terezi, Gamzee, Sollux, himself, Aradia, Kanaya, Vriska, a girl with short hair and a blue hat, and then three pictures that were plain except for a large question mark. “Who’s that?" He asked as he pointed at the girl with the blue cap.

"Her name is Nepeta! She came to us while you were out." Calliope informed him, “And there are still three more to come!"

Tavros stared at them, “These are, uh, really good. Did you draw them?" Calliope smiled and nodded and took another sip of her tea. “Uh… how do you know there will be three more?"

Calliope shook her head, “There was always supposed to be sixteen of you, that’s just how it was meant to happen!"

"Oh…"  _She’s crazier than I am._  “How do you know that?"

Calliope smiled, “Because there were sixteen before the fire, you are here to replace them!"

Tavros shook his head, “I… I don’t understand… you're starting to sound like Gamzee…"

Calliope tilted her head, “Gamzee? Does he talk about this?"

"I don’t know, it’s weird…he’s always saying crazy stuff…uh, you know, about how if we imagine something, it will happen, and about how we aren’t really here, and uh, about being trapped in someone’s head." Tavros shook his head as he rolled away to her desk, picking up his own cup and taking a sip. He squinted at its bitterness and sat it back down. He stared out the window for a moment before someone was directly in front of him, their hand around his neck, lifting him from the chair.

"What the fuck does he know!?" It looked like Calliope, but sounded different and had no hair. It was a man in red suspenders, dangling Tavros above the wheel chair. Tavros gripped onto his arm, coughing. “Tell me what that fucking clown knows!"

"I… don’t… know!" Tavros choked out as the man sat him back on the chair, although his hand didn’t leave his neck.

"What is he going to do?!"

Tavros shook his head as much as he could despite the tight grip, “Don’t… know…."

Caliborn let go of him, kicking at the chair and sending him rolling backwards. “Take him back downstairs. Make sure he doesn’t remember any of this." Two men opened the door to the office just in time to catch Tavros’ chair and wheel him out.

* * *

A/N: Yeah so I told you it would be really shippy .-. Hope you didn’t mind all of it haha

Still trying to be mysterious and whatnot, I think the next chapter I will introduce the remaining characters and after that will the beginning of the real plot and hopefully a couple chapters after that things will start to make sense! :D

I hope you all are still enjoying this, I love reading all your reviews and talking to you all! c: You all are just so great, let me hug each and every one of you <333

Here’s this chapter’s edits! First up is Vriska who is a narcissist so her shirt is (supposed to be) a mirror and then there’s Nepeta who is a cannibal (or in technical terms, she suffers from ‘wendigo pyschosis’) and her shirt is a bone. Oh and here's the layout for the first floor too, I'll add the layout for the second floor on the next chapter! (If you picture it differently, that's fine, this is just how I imagine it set up when I'm writing it!)


	13. Equius' Arrival - updated 4/26/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You really are not going to leave me alone, are you? Equius Zahhak would love some alone time so he doesn't punch a wall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry it took forever for this chapter and its actually really short and I was supposed to introduce Equius, Eridan, and Feferi and I only introduced Equius with like a hint of Eridan, I'm really sorry, there's an explanation at the end!!!

 John woke with a start but Dave was quickly shh'ing him. "What's going on...?" He whispered but Dave just rolled over to point at the bed across the room.

"There is some sort of creature sleeping in your room."

"Uh...I'm sure it's not a 'creature' and probably just a new roommate..."

"No. I heard it snore and breath and it's a motherfucking beast and you aren't allowed to share a room with it."

John smiled, "Dave, calm down." A loud noise came from the other side as the figure turned over in the bed and Dave grabbed the blanket, pulling it over their heads. "What are you...!?"

"Shh!" Dave peeked out from the blanket to see a...boy? Man? Animal? Laying in the bed and propping himself up on his elbow to look around the room sleepily.

"Can you two keep it down?" He grumbled before dropping back down onto the bed.

John yanked the blanket from over him, "It's just some guy!" he whispered in frustration, "Besides, shouldn't you have gone back to your room by now?"

* * *

"Blond boy, I request that you stop sleeping in the bed with my roommate at night; it disturbs my sleep."

Dave snickered as he picked at his breakfast, "Oh yeah? You don't like hearing us, huh, make you jealous over there all alone?" John sent a glare to Dave but he ignored it. "Who are you anyway? You get here in the middle of the night?"

"My name is Equius and yes, I came in at 2:43 in the morning."

"That's awfully exact." Rose pointed out as she sipped at her drink, "Are you always this...proper?"

"Hardly. I am far from proper...and frankly, receiving such kind words makes me uncomfortable..." Equius mumbled his last sentence as he stared at his feet, causing Rose to snicker.

Terezi leaned over the table and Equius gave her a strange look as she inhaled him before dropping back into her seat. "He smells like submission."

Equius' eyes immediately shot to the floor again as he pulled at the sleeve of his shirt to dry his face, "I wasn't aware 'submission' had a smell."

Nepeta had been watching the boy carefully, her little mind racing 100 miles per hour as she tried to get a first impression of him, but even Terezi's observation of him smelling like submission couldn't tell her anything. She had to be more direct - after all, deciding whether to make a meal of him or not was very important.

"Don't worry, me and Dave can always go in his room, right?" John chirped as he took a bite of his breakfast and Dave nodded.

Karkat rolled his eyes, "Thanks for asking me if I mind, shit for brains, yeah I'm totally cool with you two fucking in the same room as where I sleep."

"We don't fu-"

"You wanna join in sometime?" Dave raised an eyebrow that could barely be seen from behind his shades and Karkat grumbled under his breath causing John to giggle.

The group fell silent as everyone picked at their food. Slowly, one by one, they finished, throwing away their trash and scattering across the common room to do as they please. Equius found himself working a puzzle with the boy he had learned was named 'Sollux' after a few confusing lisped interactions, and a very pretty girl who often hid behind him.

The puzzle didn't last very long before the table was promptly flipped onto its side, the pieces were sent scattering across the floor. Sollux jumped back, Aradia glaring daggers at the larger boy. "What the hell was that for!?"

Equius' breathing was staggered and he didn't speak, he just up-righted the table, kicked the pieces into a small pile, and walked away. He found a corner and sat down in it, his hands over his face as he tried to slow his breathing. He heard someone sit down in front of him. He moved his hands to see a girl he recognized from breakfast, crisscrossed in front of him. She tilted her head to one side, blinked, and tilted it to the other. "AC carefurry watches the new boy throw a tantrum."

"I didn't throw a tantrum." Equius sighed, "Besides, I need to be alone for a few moments. Would you please just go somewhere else?"

Nepeta closed her eyes in thought for a moment before moving to sit beside him, leaning against the wall. "I suppose I could...but I don't really have to, so I'm just going to stay right here!" She smiled at him before leaning her head back, "You don't have to talk to me or anything."

Equius drooped forward, "I'm not going to allow you to just sit here with me and not carry on a conversation. That would be extremely rude."

"AC thinks the new boy should lighten up quite a bit!"

"I don't understand why you continue to speak in that manner. What exactly are you doing?"

"AC says that she is roleplaying and that it is a lot of fun and that the new boy should try it some time!" Nepeta smiled as she turned to face him, "AC would also like to know what the new boy's name is!"

Equius sighed, "Whereas I am not going to partake in this 'roleplaying' game of yours, I will inform you my name is Equius and that it would be a 'furry' good idea if you didn't get very close to me."

"AC is excited about Equius' use of the word 'furry' in place of 'very'!" Nepeta gave a grin but then her face turned to confusion, "But I don't understand why you want me to leave you alone..."

Equius took a deep breath, stretching his legs out in front of him as he slouched back against the wall and shrugged, "Sometimes I hurt people. It's not on purpose, at least not always, but being around me makes you more likely to end up getting caught in something and I prefer not hurting any potential friends."

Nepeta pursed her lips for a moment before the corners pulled up into a smile, "Well, I'm glad you don't want to hurt me, but I really think I can take care of myself!" Her smile turned devious, "You see, I'm not always this cute and adorable!"

"Yes, I'm sure you are a regular psychopathic murderer, aren't you?"

Nepeta purred, "I've nefur been successfur, but that last time I was close!"

Equius narrowed his eyes, "Close, close to what? Killing someone? Why would you even attempt that?"

Nepeta smiled, "Beclaws I don't like people!" She puffed her cheeks, just the thought of humans usually got her angry. "People think that just beclaws we can walk around on two legs means we have some sort of importance ofur efurrything else!" She let out the breath she was holding, staring at the ground, "But that isn't true at all, people are rafur unimportant in my eyes, but we think our selves so above the world we viciously kill and consume all the animals that this planet really belongs to!" Equius stared at her, listening to her rant, trying to figure out if he should stay seated or make a run for it. "I wasn't always like this though! I used to like people but people always hurt me...the animals nefur did. So that's why I stopped eating them!"

"So...you're a vegetarian?"

Nepeta smiled, "Oh no, vegetarians don't eat meat! I just eat furry specific meat – people meat!"

"...oh."

Nepeta smiled as she turned back to lean against the wall, "So what's your story?"

Equius shrugged, "I suppose it really isn't much of a story compared to that. My father wanted me to be strong, my mother wanted me to be in control my life, they pushed me and I pushed myself. I kept pushing myself until I started pushing others. Then I was hitting others...and kicking others...and strangling others." He stopped, the thoughts racing through his mind, imaging all the different ways he enjoyed to hurt the people around him. "Well, the specifics are hardly important. The point is, I have a short temper and sometimes I can get a bit out of hand. My parents placed me here for just a short time so I can cool down and get my medicine sorted out. I doubt I will be here for more than a week or two."

Nepeta watched him carefully, "Miss Leijon thinks that herself and Equius could help each other! She waves her tail around in excitement, just imagining the fun things the two of them could do together!"

Equius sighed, standing up and stared to walk away, but he heard her pad along behind him. He turned and looked down at the small girl. "You really are not going to leave me alone, are you?"

"Nope!"

* * *

Aradia pursed her lips, her eyebrows wrinkling together in thought. "Does your person have a mustache?"

Sollux smiled as he shook his head, "No, my characters a girl, remember?"

"Shoot..." Aradia smiled a little, "But that one girl sort of looks like she has a mustache..."

"Well that's not her."

Aradia smiled a bit brighter as she flicked the piece face down and they continued their game of Guess Who. "Hey, Sollux, who's that guy...? The one who keeps staring at you?"

Sollux didn't even need to turn around to see the boy, purple highlighted hair making him stand out as he watched the two from behind a magazine. "That's just Eridan, my roommate. Ignore him...he's...obsessive."

"Obsessive...? Is he dangerous?"

"No, he's not dangerous. At least I don't think he is right now...he just, I think he likes me or something." Sollux shrugged, "Does your character have a hat?"

"Uh, no..." Aradia mumbled, still watching Eridan, "So he's in love with you or something...?" She looked down at her feet, "Do you...like him...?"

Sollux smiled as he flicked down some game pieces, "Not at all, I sort of hate the guy. He keeps going through my stuff at night and making up reasons to go in the bathroom while I'm showering." He shrugged as he looked over his shoulder and gave a wink at Eridan who held his magazine up more, covering his eyes. "Maybe he has some kind of 'obsessive love disorder'...is that even a real disorder? Can people really have that?"

Aradia shrugged, "I guess so...people have all sorts of strange things wrong in their heads...the doctors told me that I only think I'm dead...that I'm physically fine, I just have some kind of delusion and a personality disorder...that doesn't make any sense to me...if I can believe I'm dead, I'm sure he can be obsessed with being in love, right...?"

Sollux took a deep breath and let it out slowly, turning away from Eridan and back to Aradia, "I guess. Just, why did I have to become the guy's obsession?"

Aradia smiled, "Because you're a very nice guy, Sollux, and people should appreciate you more." Sollux smiled back before Aradia's face turned red and her eyes dropped back to the game, "Oh, does your character have long hair?"

"Nope."

* * *

Snowman pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. Nepeta smiled up at her. "So, one more time here...why did you tell all the other patients you are a _cannibal_?"

Nepeta thought for a moment and her big, cheeky smile slowly started to fade. "Because...because Aradia said she was a ghost...and Kanaya has those fangs...and I wanted everyone to think I was cool too! So I just...made it up...I lied for attention."

Snowman actually broke her serious expression and for just a moment she smiled. "Thank you, Nepeta, for telling the truth. Everyone craves attention sometimes but you have to be careful what you say and do to get it. You remember how you ended up here?"

"I remember...I...called in a bomb threat...people were proud of me at first til they found out there was no bomb." Nepeta grew quiet. "I don't want to get attention in these ways! I just want people to notice me and love me...Mrs Snowman, are you going to make me better?"

Snowman nodded, "We are going to begin therapy immediately. I have to say, I really do appreciate how badly you want to improve. Histrionic personality disorder can cause people to do things they know are wrong and I can tell you are done with that life. I am so proud of you."

Nepeta smiled. She didn't show it, but she was incredibly nervous. The other girls had said Snowman was rude and harsh but it seemed as log as you were willing to listen she was a very nice woman. Nepeta nodded at her and smiled again as she left the office. When she had the chance and the group was gathered, she decided to tell them the truth. But for now, she decided she would milk this a little bit longer.

* * *

 

A/N: Okay guys, I'm going to apologize for this taking so freaking long to finish and its not even very long or a very productive chapter I am so sorry. I was writing Feferi's part, but I don't know how long its going to take so I'm just uploading what I have now and once Feferi's done I promise her chapter will be much more plot-relevant than this.

Just so you know, I am NOT abandoning the story, the length its taking me to write this has nothing to do with hate at all. It's because of 1) a death in the family I am taking very hard and 2) a bad break up with the guy who got me into homestuck in the first place and is making doing anything homestuck related really, really stressful on me...

I didn't even run this chapter through my beta reader because I just wanted to get this up now while I was thinking about it. This story is NOT abandoned whatsoever, it just may take me a little longer to get these last few chapters out, because, yes, this is nearing the end.

And I'm just calling this "Equius' arrival" cuz I barely even talked about Eridan, I'll explain more about him in the next chapter with Feferi. I'm also too lazy to put Equius' edit up, so I'll put him with Eridan and Feferi in the next chapter!


	14. Eridan and Feferi's Arrivals - updated 4/26/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You both have big, dumb glasses, you'll get along swimmingly! Eridan Ampora and Feferi Peixis are finally here!

"Hello everyone!" The new girl chirped as she looked around the group of patients, "I'm Feferi and I'm here for ADHD! Attention deficit disorder! Oh...wait, that's ADD...I mean attention deficit hyper disorder! No that doesn't sound right either...hmm...give me a minute to get it, alright?"

The others smiled at her and welcomed her to the hospital. "I think the second one was right, by the way!" Jade said cheerily but Feferi shh'ed her and gave her a quick glare, causing Jade to sit back and stare at the ground, muttering an apology.

Dave gave Jade a smile as she perked up a bit before Feferi spoke again, "Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder! I was close!" She smiled and looked around the group for reassurance before continuing, "I'm reely not sure why I'm here, aren't you all super violent? I'm not violent or mean! Why am I here? Do any of you know?"

Everyone shook their heads, a couple opened their mouths to speak, but instead Feferi continued. "No matter! I bet I could be reely violent too! I've never been like that before but I bet I could if I wanted!" No one said anything, trying to keep a smile as she rambled on and on.

"Does she ever shut up?" Karkat grumbled to himself, leaning closer to Sollux.

Sollux shrugged, "It's sort of cute how she doesn't notice that no one gives a shit." Aradia whispered to him but he smiled at her, "Well, she can't help it, right?" Another whispered message and Sollux shook his head. "Don't worry, alright?"

Karkat rolled his eyes as the two continued their conversation, only one side of it being heard. By the time he connected back with the others, Feferi had gone off on what was close to her fifth tangent of the conversation. He quickly disconnected from it, standing up and wandering away from the group. He didn't even look at the nurses as he made his way up the stairs, the majority of the time the nurses never paid any attention to them. Sometimes Karkat considered just walking right out the building, the doors were never locked. Although he knew it wouldn't be difficult, they all knew this, none of them ever felt the need to leave. No one wanted to stay there but leaving had never honestly crossed their minds since their arrivals.

Once Feferi slowed to a stopping point, John jumped in. "Hey, I have an idea! Since its been a while since we all introduced ourselves, maybe we should give everyone a little background? So many new people started showing up so quickly, I don't even know if I remember everyone's names!"

Rose nodded, "That's an excellent idea, John. How about you start?"

John swallowed and took a breath, "Yeah, sure! Well, I'm John and I'm here for anxiety and avpd. My dad refused to help me with medication or take me to appointments so I was brought here to get better." He nodded at the next in the circle and Dave picked up.

"I'm Dave and I'm here for schizophrenia. My..." suddenly Dave's head hurt. He couldn't think. Who brought him here? Who did he know outside of this hospital? He felt like something huge was escaping him. "Thats...all..." he stammered and Rose quickly jumped in to give him some thinking time.

"I'm Rose and I am here for obsessive compulsive personality disorder. My mother, supposedly, is not responsible with her drinking so I was removed from the home and placed here."

Jade received a kind look from Rose and realized she was next. "My name is Jade! I am here for ptsd. I was...hurt and that is all I will say. Karkat, you're turn!"

Karkat grumbled, he had been thankful he had only had to do this once. "She just said my name. I'm here for depression and suicidal shit."

Terezi placed a comforting hand on his knee, "My name is Terezi and I have synesthesia." Everyone looked on to the next in line when she spoke again, "And...I have borderline personality disorder."

Karkat looked up at her, "Terezi, you never-"

"You never asked."

The room grew silent for a few moments before Sollux spoke. "Hey, Sollux here. I'm bipolar and you're all lucky enough that my manic state ended while I was in the ER before they brought me here so none of you have seen me flip out. Yet." He looked behind him, "And this is-"

"Aradia." Aradia said, trying to speak louder and she shuffled to sit beside Sollux instead of behind. "I have Cotard's syndrome which makes me believe I am dead. I also have stpd."

"My name is Kanaya," Kanaya spoke calmly, "I am here for obsessive compulsive disorder although my identity as a vampire is being seen as a "disorder" as well since my arrival. I assure you it is the truth."

Vriska spoke next, "Vriska here! I'm a narcissist and a sociopath, so I have npd and aspd. I'm here because I'm also violent, though."

Nepeta fidgeted as all eyes were on here. "My name is Nepeta and I am a...well...I have histrionic personality disorder. So...I may have told you all some things, like that I eat people or have tried to kill people, that aren't really true. I'm sorry..."

The whole room looked substantially more relieved.

"You already know me!" Feferi added happily.

Equius sighed. He didn't want to be a part of this but it seemed like a big deal. "My name is Equius. I have impulse control problems and rage. I get very angry easily. I haven't been given a single diagnoses yet."

The boy with the purple hair spoke next, "My name is Eridan. This is my first time being evaluated so I do not know yet what I have but they have mentioned dependent personality disorder."

Gamzee was last, "The name's Gamzee, motherfuckers. I'm all here for drug abuse, homocidal actions, and paranoid personality disorder." The group grew quiet having everyone introduced themselves before he spoke again. "That's all 15 of us but damn if a motherfucker didn't think there was all up and 16 of us?"

* * *

Karkat made his way to the second floor, looking from one closed door to the next until he heard someone speaking, not caring to keep their voices down either. He leaned his ear up to a door, listening carefully before knocking. The voices fell silent and he opened the door slowly.

"Karkat?" Vriska asked, looking up at him, "What are you doing here?"

Karkat glanced between Vriska and Terezi, closing the door behind him. "I was going to take a fucking nap, why are you two here?"

Vriska was quiet and she looked at Terezi who merely nodded. "Something weird is going on here."

Karkat narrowed his eyes, "Like what?"

"Karkat," Terezi said quietly as she took a deep breath, "Do you remember a guy with a mohawk? He was in a wheelchair at one point because Vriska beat him up?"

Karkat shook his head, "No, what the fuck are you guys talking about?"

"I can't put my finger on it," Vriska bit her lip, "But he was here, I swear. Terezi doesn't remember him either and I feel like every day I forget more about that guy. And there was someone else too...he wasn't here long, I don't think he was even staying in the hospital, but he was here."

"Karkat, something really weird is happening here and we're going to get to the bottom of it." Terezi said with a smirk, before she nodded at Vriska, "Maybe you can help?"

Karkat made a confused face, one eyebrow raised, "I don't what the hell you two crotchsniffers are talking about but the only weird thing here is how normal you're acting. I mean, what the hell was that the other day?"

Terezi shook her head, "I thought I made it clear back at the meeting that there are things about you don't know or understand yet. But besides that something weird is happening and I will bet you anything that drugged out clown knows exactly what it is."

"What exactly do I all up and know about?"

All eyes turned to the door behind Karkat as it opened and a messy haired Gamzee stepped into the room.

Vriska stood up, "You know damn well what we're talking about!"

Gamzee's lazy eyes darted from one person in the room to another before he shrugged, "I been gettin' my thinkpan at what is all happenin' but I'm afraid I can't get you a straight answer, motherfuckers."

"Bullshit!" Vriska called out, her eyes narrowing at him, "You know exactly what is happening here, to us, to our friends! Who was the mohawk guy? Where did he go? Why can't I remember him?"

Gamzee's eyes opened wide for the first time and he looked a little shocked, "You all remember him too?"

"Hell yeah! Who was he? What did you do to him?"

Gamzee shook his head, "I didn't do anything to him, the motherfucker was my roommate and I...I thought I was the only one who remembered him."

Vriska sighed, "No, I told you, I remember him. Now answer my goddamned question, where is he?"

Gamzee shrugged.

"What happened to him, fucking tell me or...or..." Vriska took a deep breath, raising an arm, a small gun clutched in her palm. "or I'll shoot you."

Terezi took a step back, "It smells black. Put the gun down, Vriska...I can hear death, put it down."

Karkat stepped away from Gamzee, his eyes wide, "Where the hell did you get that!?"

"Shut up." Vriska said in a low voice, "I can have anything I want. Right Gamzee?"

Gamzee nodded his head, raising his own gun to her. "Motherfucker, so can I." He gave a lazy smile. "But you won't be shooting me. You're all going at shooting yourself."

Vriska turned the gun around and with a flick of her finger and a shot so loud it, for a moment, sounded completely silent, fell to the ground.

Karkat looked at her body. His eyes flicked to Gamzee then back to the ground. Nothing. Terezi fell to her knees. "Vriska..." She said quietly, her sightless eyes flicked from Gamzee to the ground beside her. She felt around on the empty floor. "Where is she?"

"Who?" Karkat asked, moving to sit in front of her, "Terezi, are you crying?"

"Fuck!" Terezi cursed as she felt around the ground, "She was...right here...I think..." She pushed her glasses up, rubbing at her eyes. "What happened to her?" She took a few deep breaths, "V...vr...damnit!" She cursed again, "I...don't remember her!"

Gamzee looked down at her, squatting down beside Karkat, "What all happened, motherfucker? Who are you all up and going on about?"

Terezi gritted her teeth, standing up. "She was here. I can still smell her."

* * *

"Hey, water you doing? Why are you always watching him, anyway? Isn't that kind of weird, ya know? Always just sitting back here and watching that guy, it's sort of creepy, actually! No wonder he doesn't like you, you're pretty creepy! You should try just talking to him instead of watching him all the time, it's reely weird!" Feferi sat beside Eridan as he stared over the back of the couch, clambering on from the moment she sat down.

Eridan slunk down into the couch, turning around to sit in it correctly, "What does it matter? If I talk to him he won't like me anyway..." Feferi turned around, her legs folded as she sat on the couch next to him, facing him as he leaned over, his elbows on his knees and he huffed and puffed that no one ever seemed to like him as much as he liked them.

Feferi smiled, "Maybe you're just trying too hard? Lighten up a bit!"

Eridan sighed but said nothing.

"Or maybe you should just find someone else? Isn't he with that ghost girl, anyway? Don't waste you're time on him! He's sort of weird himself and you can never understand what he's saying and I don't know, there's just so many more fish in the sea!!!"

Eridan shook his head as he looked around the room. Aradia and Sollux were playing a game together as usual. Equius was trying to tell Nepeta something important while she spent the time coloring and paying little attention to him. John and Dave were on one side of the foosball table, Rose and Kanaya on the other, and were apparently doing a very good job of kicking their asses, and Jade was keeping score. Gamzee was entertaining Terezi and Karkat with some sort of magic trick from the book he borrowed from John.

"The only single people here are the clown guy and the girl with the huge glasses and buck teeth."

Feferi smiled widely, "Yeah, what about her? You both have big, dumb glasses, you'll get along swimmingly!"

Eridan sighed, "Havin' glasses isn't proof I'll get along with her."

Feferi wrinkled her nose, glancing around the room again, "Whale, you said the clown guy, Gamzee, was single! Water 'bout him?"

Eridan glanced back at him as he tried to do a card trick but ended up getting cussed out by Karkat and Terezi had never liked the guy very much in the first place. He gave the two a big, goofy grin anyway, taking a clumsy bow as the two stood up and left, Karkat still visibly angry over whatever reason the trick had pissed him off. Gamzee shrugged as he wandered off and headed up the stairs. Eridan assumed he was going to take a nap, the guy seemed to spend an awful lot of time in his room and didn't really associate with any of them much.

Eridan shook his head, "He's weird."

"So are you!"

"He's weirder."

Feferi giggled, "Water 'bout me?"

Eridan's eyes flicked up to her for just a second before they locked in on the floor between his feet, "Wh-what about you?"

"I'm single, too," Feferi smiled but Eridan kept his eyes downcast. "Hey, are you lisfining? I said I'm single too!"

"I heard ya..." Eridan said quietly, a small blush creeping over his cheeks. "But, you don't really, like, want to date me or...or something...right?"

Feferi hummed to herself, "Whale, not reely but we could always try? If I don't like you, I'll just break up with you!"

Eridan bit his lip, "Feferi, I don't think you really understand how attached I get, if you break up with me, I-"

"Oh, be quiet and stop worrying!" Feferi smiled, scooting closer to him, "Do you want to go out with me or not?"

"I-I guess."

* * *

_A girl threw away the wrapper to her late-night snack and made her way to the couch. Saturdays, the hospital always played a movie after they ate their last snack for the night which was around nine thirty. No one ever made it all the way through the movie because between checking vital signs for the night and last minute therapy session, kids were pulled from the movie or grew tired and went to bed before it was over all the time. The movie was always an old 'classic' that no one had any real interest in anyway._

_The girl, her short blond hair flipped out at the bottom, sat on the couch beside a boy, his extremely light blonde hair almost looked white and he turned to her, speaking in a higher voice than you would originally think he had, "Roxy!" He said happily, he gave her a hug and moved over so she could have more room on the couch._

_"Hey, Calliope," Roxy greeted the boy with his female counterpart's name. Roxy could tell just from the look in his eyes, along with the fact he was actually talking to her, that she wasn't dealing with Caliborn tonight._

_Calliope smiled as she stared at the opening credits of the movie, "The movie isn't that terrible this time!"_

_Roxy smiled and started to say something but was quieted by one of the other patients who were gathered in other chairs and couches and piles of pillows on the floor in front of the small tv that the movie played on._

_The room grew quiet except for the music of the movie and the ticking of a clock. One patiently blatantly asking if the clock could be thrown out, saying it was too loud. He was ignored._

_The group settled into the movie before Roxy was pulled away to have her blood pressure taken and given her nightly medicine. She was only there for detox from alcoholism but had trouble falling asleep in the uncomfortable hospital beds and took sleeping medicine before bed._

_Calliope waved at her as she left, knowing she probably wouldn't be back for the rest of the movie and would head straight to bed after she took her medicine to avoid falling asleep in the day room._

_Calliope barely even noticed when the characters in the movie began to speak to one another but as soon as she tried to zone back into the movie, a loud noise rang through the room. Everyone's head turned, looking around for the source, a few nurses jumping up. A voice over the intercom told them to calmly leave the building. It repeated the words 'calmly' and 'in single file.'_

_Everyone stood up, looking to the three nurses on staff for the night. Everyone looked confused, no one moved. Calliope ran to a window, looking out as best she could to see firetrucks rolling up to the front of the building. She looked the other way and saw flames licking at the trees that surrounded the building. She looked up but from what her limited view out of the window showed, the building itself was fine. There was a loud crash and it seemed the whole building shook._

_Someone screamed just before bits of glass scattered across the room from one of the other windows. A tree had crashed through one wall of the building, the fire that bit at the bark spreading onto the walls of the building. Some cried from beneath the fallen tree, a few patients made it past the nurses and tried to pull the girl out. Fire had already started to singe her hair and clothing and she screamed so loudly Calliope held her hands over her ears. She tried to pretend it wasn't happening until she heard one girl, a girl with short black hair they called Jane, screaming frantically, "Roxy! Roxy – isn't someone going to help her!?"_

_No one answered but the two boys who had made their way closest to her pulled at her arms and tried to free her without touching the flaming tree trunk. Everyone else stood as far away from the window as possible before a loose branch crashed the other window near Calliope. It didn't enter the building, just fell hard enough to shatter the window and send shards of glass everywhere. Calliope fell over and crawled backwards away from the wall. Everyone was crying and screaming._

_She stood up, gritting her teeth, the sound of crying being something she couldn't deal with and she opened her mouth, yelling, "What are all you fuckers doing!?" Caliborn's eyes opened wide, taking in the scene. He heard Calliope talking to him, screaming to run. She said to save them. Caliborn shook his head as he turned and made a break for the door. It was unlocked because of the emergency evacuation. He ran into the hall, doubling over for a breath before he turned back to the room. He screamed at them to follow him. A few broke from their shock and started to run after the door, when they heard the cracking._

_Caliborn looked at the ceiling to see a crack forming from where the tree had broken through not only the window, but the wall above it also and part of the ceiling. It hit the lights, cracking around the ceiling fans, one falling out of the ceiling, held by only some wires. The cracking branched across the ceiling of the day room, everyone frozen as they watched it spread. Calliope screamed in his head to run one final time before he watched the ceiling collapse over the entire room._

_He looked up at the ceiling above his own head, it was made differently from that of the ceiling of the day room, but he knew he still didn't have long before it fell too. He took a breath, turning and running as fast as he could through the hallway. By now, the rest of the hospital had vacated and the emergency unlock button had been pressed, opening all the doors through the hallway and shooting down the stairs as quickly as possible. He ran through the unlocked doors, glancing into the rooms for a quicker escape than making his way out to the front._

_He found none, bursting from the front door just as a fireman was heading in. He grabbed the man by the arms, yanking him away._

_"Son, are you hurt?" The man asked him and Caliborn shook his head._

_"I'm fine, but-but everyone else...there's no way they-!" Caliborn yelled as he felt someone grab him by the shoulders and pull him away from the building. He screamed as he saw the fireman running inside the building followed by a few others. "There's no way they're alive..."_

* * *

A/N: I got in a writing mood and I was able to pull this off! I hope you guys liked it! C: I didn't run this one through my beta either OTL I'm sorry, I was just so excited that I had finally been able to write I wanted to upload it as soon as I could!

Thought food: What happened to Tavros??? Why are Vriska and Gamzee the only ones who remember him? How did Gamzee make Vriska shoot herself anyway!? What the hell is really going on in this place!? Was Caliborn/Calliope the only one who survived the fire? What about Bro/Dirk who showed up for a while? What exactly happened to him anyway? Hiddenhikari, how the hell are you keeping all this straight in your head? (I can answer that one, I have like four word docs filled with notes for this fanfic and like three pictures of the layout of the building haha)

Speaking of pictures of the layout of the building! Here's Equius, Eridan, and Feferi's edits along with the layout of the second floor which includes who is rooming with who! Any room with a red dot in it is one that's under surveilence like Dave and Karkat!

Equius' shirt is a fist cuz he has anger issues, Eridan's is a heart because he may not have a diagnosis but it fits, and Feferi's is boring and just says ADHD like Jade's that just said PTSD.


	15. Update - not a real chapter - updated 4/26/16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to excite anyone who may have been expecting another chapter! This is just an authors note about the upcoming new chapters!

Hello everyone!  
Wow its been...um...maybe three years now? I'm not sure but its definitely been a while!  
I know some of you may have been convinced this story was over and for a while it pretty much was...  
The ~drama~ happening in the comments became too much for me, to the point I never even wanted to log into ao3 for fear there would be a new comment.  
Also there was the fact I became convinced I was a horrible writer and should just give up. It wasn't only this fic I neglected these past couple years.  
And finally there was the fact I just plain got bored of Homestuck for a while.  
But thanks to some help from my girlfriend, I've decided to try writing again and I just KNEW this was the fic I owed the most to and wanted to finish the most. And after the final update of Homestuck reawoke my love for this fandom, I logged back in today and saw an influx in comments, none of which criticizing me or my fic, just asking for more, and it made me feel like perhaps the storm has passed!  
However i am seeing that I definitely did have some stuff wrong in the fic. I feel like I didn't chose disorders that made the most sense for a couple characters and some of the characters I was never as interested in were most certainly out of character at times, and I have learned some new things about some different mental illnesses over the last two years that I think will help make my characterization of some of the disorders better - although I would like to remind everyone that this fic has a plot that goes a lot further than simply demonstrating how different disorders effect people.  
Because I do have these things I want to fix and change, before I write anymore chapters, I will be updating the existing chapters. Ill update the chapters title after I fix each of them so you can reread and stay with the story if you like!  
These things will be happening VERY VERY SLOWLY though because my current living situation has the absolute worst wifi possible. Im going to see what I can do to update things via my phone (im writing this on my phone too so please excuse any mistakes), if I can do that, it will go a lot faster than updating from my computer where I have maybe twenty minutes of wifi a week.  
Anyway I'll wrap this up now, I just wanted to say thank you to those of you who continuously check on this fic and apologize for leaving you all in the dark for so long. But I'm back now everyone and this fic will be better than ever!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update: so it turns out I can both update the chapters and write new chapter with my phone!!! Which is why over the last couple days I have gone back over all previous chapters. Mostly what I changed was spelling and grammar mistakes but a few important changes were added. I recommend rereading but here's the gist:  
> Rose has ocpd instead of bibliomania  
> Nepeta has HPD and the cannibal thing was just a lie for attention  
> Terezi has bpd which explains her exaggerated emotions towards karkat  
> Vriska has npd and aspd now  
> Eridan has dpd instead of old  
> John has avpd plus his anxiety  
> John has anxiety and avpd  
> Kanaya has ocd along w her vampirism  
> Aradia has stpd along w her cotards syndrome  
> Gamzee has ppd on top of his drug addiction and homocidal actions  
> I dont think anything was changed that directly related to the overall plot of the third floor and the fire and caliborn/calliope


	16. Its Not Over *new 4/26/16*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its time for the girls to explore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *fic emerges from the dust of abandonment*  
> Yes, I know, it has been years since I wrote on this fic. I'm not gonna dissapoint you guys by saying some bullshit like "ILL UPDATE EVERY WEEK!!!" cuz lets be honest here: I won't. BUT! I am very passionate about finishing this and I'm going to do my best to do my original concept justice!

A clicking echoed down the empty hallway accompanied by soft footsteps padding in time with it. They stopped for a moment, just long enough for their owner to sniff at the air around her, the ends of her lips twisting up into a smile. The rod tapping along in front of her quickly came to a stop as it banged against the next step up in the stairwell. She gripped the handrail with her free hand as she climbed the stairs, stopping occasionally to sniff at her surroundings.  She stopped for a moment upon reaching the top, her head was dizzy and she felt as though the ground beneath her was unstable. She dropped her cane and bit her lip as she heard it clatter down the staircase behind her. She held onto the railings and the wall with both hands now, slowly inching herself into a sitting position. Everything had suddenly become so loud, as if every noise she had ever heard were bombarding her senses all at once. She was only moments away from crawling back down the stairs when she heard a door creek open in front of her.

* * *

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down there, little motherfucker. You went up the stairs and what all up and happened?" Gamzee asked, his sloppy speech and uncaring demeanor only succeeding in frustrating Terezi even more.

Terezi sighed as she leaned forward on the empty bed in Gamzee's room. He sat across from her on his own bed. "This girl found me on the stairs. She wouldn't tell me who she was but she said she wasn't a patient or a staff member. I asked her...I asked her about the girl..."

Gamzee looked confused, "You all still going up and on about that girl that ain't never even existed?"

"Yes, I am. The same way you claim you had a roommate." Terezi fired back. "But look...I asked her about both of them. And she knew them. Vaguely but she did. The same way we do. She didn't remember names or faces but she said they were real at some point. But now they aren't."

Gamzee nodded thoughtfully. "You all know what we gotta up and do right?" Terezi was silent, she had no idea. "We gotta kill everyone in this bitch."

"WHAT?" Terezi yelled standing up, "Are you stupid, what would be the point in that?"

Gamzee didn't react to her anger, he just leaned back and stared at the ceiling. "Don't you all get it? We ain't belonging up in here. Motherfuckers are just pawns. Replacements. Once we're gone, he'll get his thinkpan settled again."

"He? Who are you always talking about with this ominous 'he?'"

"You ain't figured it out yet? You met half of him today."

* * *

Rose groggily pulled her door open. She was half expecting to see Kanaya. The two had been dating since her second day in the hospital and occasionally she would come to her door late at night and request a chat. (She would never just come in - vampires had to be invited.) This time, however, it wasn't only Kanaya. It was Terezi with Kanaya behind her. "Hey!" Terezi half whispered. "You up?"

Rose wiped at her eyes, "I am now." She peeked around at Kanaya who was watching the end of the hall. "What is going on?"

"We're looking for someone." Terezi said as Kanaya joined them.

Kanaya stood beside Terezi now, "She says someone is upstairs."

Rose nodded, "Dave said he and John have been up there. They heard footsteps but didn't see anyone."

"Well I spoke to her." Terezi replied quickly.

At that point, Jade slid from bed and popped up behind Rose. "What's goin' on?" She asked sleepily.

Rose turned to her, "I believe they want to go to the third floor."

Terezi nodded, "You wanna go too?"

"Sure!" Jade said, turning to fumble around the counter for her glasses. "But why?"

"You will see." Kanaya replied and the four girls slipped from the room and down the hallway. They climbed the stairs and pushed open the door.

"Its just like John said." Rose said quietly as she took in the hallway. They wandered down the corridor until they hit a split. They looked down one way then the other before deciding to split up.

"Me and Kanaya will go this way." Rose said as she took Kanaya's hand in her own and headed to the right.

Jade and Terezi nodded as they went left.

The first thing Rose noticed was that the red and green pattern had stopped as soon as they entered the hallway. The walls were solid red. There were no statues or photographs anymore and it seemed like the carpet hadn't been vacuumed in years. It smelled of dirt and dust. They passed a single door and after finding the hallway ended in a dead end, they returned to it. "Are you really sure this is a very good idea?" Rose whispered as Kanaya reached for the doorknob.

"I will not allow you to get hurt." Kanaya answered as she turned the knob and pushed the door open. Inside was a bed. Two lamps were on either side on identical tables. The bed was stripped completely except for a dust ruffle and a pillow with no case. The two entered the room. There wasn't really anything of interest. They found a closet that was empty aside from a few hangers and something covered in the back. Kanaya pulled it out and took the cover off to find a simple foldable wheelchair. It felt out of place. When they unfolded it they found a pair of dice sitting in the seat. They returned the chair and decided to catch up with Terezi and Jade as there was nothing else of interest here.

They exited the room and continued back down the hallway. They passed the first hallway that ended with a glass case and a fancy chair. They paid it no attention as they continued after their friends. This time, they noticed the hallway was green and meticulously clean and smelled of air freshener and pine. They found a door identical to the other one cracked open. They pushed it slightly, "Terezi? Jade?" They found themselves now in a room the same size as the last but it resembled an office more than a spare bedroom. There was a huge desk in front of a large window with the curtains down. There was a shadow behind the desk. It seemed to be breathing heavily and held something long in its hands.

_We gotta kill everyone in this bitch._

"Terezi? Is that you?" Rose asked as she took a step closer.

_Where did you get that gun!?_

The figure slid one of the items in its hand into the other item, sheathing it. They turned around, what little light filtering through the curtains bouncing off their red glasses. "Maybe...he's right," she whispered.

"Terezi, is there blood on your face?" Kanaya asked rushing towards her. She wiped at the red glob on her chin but when she looked at her hand there was nothing. No one else was in the room.

"Well did you find anything?" Rose asked impatiently.

Terezi scoffed, flicking her cane around to find her way out from behind the desk. "Of course not. Why would you send a blind person to investigate alone? I have deduced that the room sounds like sour apples. How's that?"

Rose ignored her as she looked at the walls. One side had photos of her friends. There were three other picture frames throughout the line that had been scratched out and the faces unrecognizable. On the other side were people who looked like her friends but were not them. Three of them had a stamp of their faces that said "dead." As she looked down the row she stopped cold. "Mom...?" She looked back at Kanaya and Terezi. "Guys, I think it would be in our best interest if we left right no-"  
The door to the room shut suddenly.

"What are you all motherfuckers doin' here?"

"Gamzee?" Terezi called out.

Gamzee shoved his hands into his pockets as he wobbled through the room. "Hey." He said suddenly as he stopped to stare at one of the scratched out pictures. "Motherfucker can you all come here and give this a whiff?"

Terezi crossed her arms. "Why would I use my cool color smelling disorder to help _you_?"

Gamzee shook his head, "It ain't about me. I'm tellin' ya. This thing's way bigger than us. We're motherfuckin' pawns. And if you smell this shit I think you'll like what you hear."

Terezi sighed as she walked over to him. He pulled a picture off the wall and held it in front of her face. She smelled it. "I don't understand...its so familiar...I've never smelled an emotion like this. Its like..."  _Like when I lick Karkat's arms..._ "but its wrong. It sounds so far away. Almost like when someone says your name and you don't know if you imagined it or not." Gamzee asked her to smell the other two and she described them similarly.

Rose watched them patiently but she didn't really understand what these two kept going on about. They were always remembering people no one else did and making a big deal of it. She thought the fact there was a drawing of her mom as a young girl on the wall was more important. "Hey guys. I am sorry to interrupt but do any of you recognize any of these people?"

Gamzee and Terezi turned their attention towards Rose and along with Kanaya they began to scan the photos. Terezi ran her hand across them until she stopped at one. Tears started to fall from beneath her glasses. "This is her. This is my mom."

"My mother is here as well." Kanaya whispered, staring up at the photograph.

"Well shit if my motherfuckin' pops ain't all up there too." Gamzee added.

"What do you think it means?" Rose asked but no one had an answer.

Gamzee continued down the line until he found a picture of a boy with a red-tipped mohawk. A stamp across his face marked him as deceased. He looked across the hall and it was mirrored by a scratched out picture frame. The pattern continued down the wall, all three deceased pictures mirrored the scratched ones. "We're all just motherfuckin' replacements..." he whispered as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small switchblade. He flicked it open and stared at the three girls, all too preoccupied by the photos of their mothers. "We gotta get rid of em one by motherfuckin' one." He wrapped his arm around one of the girls necks and dug the knife deep inside, pulling slowly across her jugular. He let go and she dropped to the ground. A photograph on the other side of the room clattered to the floor and they jumped. When they turned back, the woman with red sunglasses had been stamped dead.

* * *

 _You have to accept what happened or you will never move on. Creating more is not the correct course to take. You need to integrate. We need to remove them one by one. Caliborn? Are you listening to me? These are merely replacements. They do not determine who you are._  
  
_Hello Caliborn. It is nice to see you up today. How are you feeling? Are you not answering me again? No bother. You will never recover this way. Your replacements will take over your mind. That is all they are. I know you miss your friends but...ah! Calliope! Why it is a pleasure, as always. Have you and Caliborn considered integration anymore?_  
  
_You two surely must know you cannot just sleep this all away. I will be in my office when you are serious about treatment. These replacements need to be removed. You need to kill everyone inside of there._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As much as I would love to add a map of the third floor, I wrote this entire chapter on my phone and there is no way to add images on mobile. I dont think so anyway? If anyone knows how to code it please let me know and ill add one next chapter! For now, I feel like this chapter revealed a LOT. Any guesses whats going on? :D


	17. It's For His Own Good *new 4/29/16*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Memories resurface and only one person can explain things. If only he could speak like a normal fucking person.  
>  **TRIGGER WARNING:** suicide - its warned ahead of the paragraph its discussed in

"Rose Lalonde?" Nurse Scratch called across the day room. Rose looked away from the movie she and Kanaya had chosen. Nurse Scratch waved her closer and she excused herself. She made her way over to him and asked what he needed. "You have a family session."

"You mean my mom is here?" Rose asked excitedly. She had missed her mother so much. She had so many things to tell her and ask her.

"Yes, she is with Mrs. Snowman right now." Scratch replied as he turned to lead her towards the therapy office.

Rose's face turned to a frown. She didn't expect it to be a therapy session. She thought she was just here to visit. Although, now that she thought about it, this was the first time she had seen any of their parents even inside the building. She tried to force herself to keep an open mind as she entered the office.

"Rose?" A woman with short blonde hair asked as she stood up, "I'm so glad to see you!"

"Mom!" Rose said as she rushed towards her mother and threw her arms around her.

"Rose." The woman repeated as she placed her hands on Rose's cheeks, "I am so, so sorry. For everything..."

Rose held her mother close, "It's not your fault mom. It's not at all."

Rose's mom shook her head, "No, I should have been more responsible. While you've been getting help so have I. We'll make things so much better between us."

Rose stared up her mom happily as Snowman called their attention back to herself. "That is all very good to hear, Ms. Lalonde. I speak for Rose as well when I say we are both proud of you. And you have every reason to be proud of your daughter as well. She has improved greatly over her stay here. Once we hear back from child protective services and they give us the go ahead, she will be allowed to return home with you."

Rose's mother's eyes brightened and Rose began to tear up. This was great news, right?

* * *

"This is terrible..." Rose said as she let her face fall into her hands.

Kanaya rubbed her back softly, "How so? Is it not a good thing that you have made improvements and will return home?"

Rose mummbled from her hands and Kanaya asked for clarification. "That is good...but what's not good is that...I'll be leaving you..."

"Rose..." Kanaya said solemnly, "you cannot sacrifice that for me. We will find eachother outside of here. I am sure of it."

"Kanaya, you realize you won't be leaving here until you understand you're a human, right?"

Kanaya smiled, "That is it! If I turn you, they will think you are crazy and keep you here."

Rose gave her a pitiful smile, "I'll think of something. I promise."

* * *

"Are you sure, dude?" Dave breathed heavily as he looked down at John. The boy's glasses were crooked and his hair was messy.

John smiled and nodded, his cheeks lightly blushing red. "I'm sure, Dave!"

Dave nodded as he pulled John's shirt up and slunk under the blanket. He began to unbutton his pants and pull them down. His hand was on the strip of elastic at the top of John's underwear when the light was flicked on and the door flew open. Dave jumped up in shock, effectively wrapping himself in the blanket and falling over. After one angry rant from a nurse, the two were escorted from the room and placed in solitary. "I told you it was a bad idea!" John shouted from his cell.

"BS dude. It was you're idea to-" Dave stopped mid-sentence, looking down at the floor of his cell. "What are these...?"

"What?" John called out to Dave through the thick wall between them.

"Nothin. Just some sick shades. I mean, they aren't really my style or anything but they're fuckin familar as shit." Dave replied as he held the glasses up. He removed his own and placed them on his face. He ran his finger across the pointed sides. Dave looked into the far corner of the room to see Cal staring at him. The puppet man's shaky legs carried him closer to Dave. "Do you remember him?"

Dave narrowed his eyes, "Remember...who?"

Cal spun around on one floppy leg before falling into Dave's lap. "Your big bro. The one you lived with before coming here. Don't tell me you've forgotten your own brother?"

Dave thought about that for a moment. A brother? No...before here? Where had he lived before coming here? He couldn't remember. He couldn't remember anything before the moment he entered this building. He wrapped his arms around himself as he began to shake. Cal jumped up and began to dance. "You really are crazy!!!" He sang, "You'll be here forever!!!"

"Dave?" John called out again as he heard sniffling coming through. "Are you okay?

Dave wracked his brain. A brother sounded vaguely familiar...like deja vu you can't track down. He couldn't place a face to a brother. "John...have I ever mentioned a brother?"

"Brother?" John repeated, "I dont-"

They heard the door at the end of the hall open. Footsteps followed and John stood up to peak out of the window on his door. He saw a nurse place someone inside the room across from him. They waited til the nurse left before the boy spoke. "Who all motherfuckers are in here?"

"Gamzee?" Dave yelled out.

"Davebro!" Gamzee said with a laugh, "I'm always endin up in this bitch with you and your boyfriend. What'd you motherfuckers all up and do this time?"

John shuffled awkwardly, "Th-that doesn't matter."

Gamzee started to say some snide comment but Dave interrupted, "Gamzee. You've talked about people who were here but now are gone. What the hell's up with that anyway?"

Gamzee shook his head, "You won't get it, brother. I've explained it so many motherfuckin times and ain't no one up and listened to a word I fuckin said."

"I will. Something fuckin weird is going on." Dave insisted.

Gamzee thought for a moment. "Alright. But you gotta get your wait on til were out of here. Then I'll tell you everything I motherfucking know."

* * *

Karkat stood in the second floor hall. He stood next to a door on the girl's side, waiting, but no one ever opened it. He huffed and knocked again. Eridan walked past him then retreated, "You skipping lunch to loiter in vacant hallways again?"

"I'm not skipping lunch you shiteared pisswipe. I'm just waiting for someone."

Eridan rolled his eyes, "Everyone else is downstairs."

"Did I miss her?" Karkat asked himself, checking down the hallway. "Is, um," _FUCK! What's her name again...?_ "oh fuck you, you know who I'm waiting for. Have you seen her?"

Eridan rolled his eyes again, "I have no idea who you are going on about. I'm going now."

Karkat grumbled as he left. That guy was so stuck up and always acted like he was better than him. Well, he definitely was better than Karkat, but he at least shouldn't act like he knows it. Karkat knocked on the door one more time before slowly pushing it open. "Hey uh...you in there?" He asked, covering his eyes just for good measure. When he heard no one stir he peeked. He looked around the room. Neither bed had sheets and there were no clothing or personal items in the room. Karkat slowly took a step inside, "What the..." he spoke quietly for perhaps the very first time in his entire life, left absolutely speechless. Even his normal phrases couldn't properly show how confused he was. He left and shut the door and checked the number. No, this was definitely the right door. Had she moved rooms without him knowing?

Karkat decided she must have and slipped out already. He left the second floor and found a nurse who escorted him to the cafeteria. He filled his tray and looked over the group of patients spread out across the tables. Where was she? He approached Rose. "Hey uh...have you seen...fuck um...glasses? Smells colors and shit?"

Rose shook her head, "Is that a movie? I don't believe I've seen it."

"No, it's not a movie, she's a fucking person!" Karkat explained angrily.

Rose shook her head again, "Then I have no idea who you are speaking about."

Karkat cussed under his breath as he left the table and found an empty one. He ate alone, confused and angry, kind of like the rest of his life had been. Once they were all finished, they were taken back to the day room.

Karkat thought back to the previous night. He was curled up with Dave, like usual, although this time Dave didn't put his arm around him. They just laid there in silence. "What the shit is bothering you so much?" He asked and Dave shook his head, but he pressed on. Finally, Dave spoke.

"Dude, have I ever talked about a brother?" Dave asked and Karkat thought for a moment. Dave continued on about this supposed older brother he had come to believe existed. Karkat nodded along and didn't contribute. He figured this was some kind of delusion, that wasn't out of the ordinary for Dave. He knew not to try to correct him when he spoke about them so he just waited for him to finish. "Do I sound fucking crazy?" Dave asked at the end.

Karkat shrugged, "I mean we all sound fucking crazy. Maybe you do have a brother. I don't fucking know."

"Gamzee said he could explain it more. He seemed to think this wasn't the first time this has happened."

Karkat hated to admit it, but if Gamzee knew what happened to Dave's bro, he probably could tell him something about his friend. T...ter...ah fuck it.

* * *

"Okay...now if you can say that one more time without sound fucking stupid." Karkat mummbled from his face in his hands.

Gamzee was growing tired of this. It was annoying. If the others could just think for themselves it was obvious what was going on. He couldn't count how many times he had to explain these disappearances. He realized he had been kind of vague every other time so he thought he could take this opportunity to explain it in detail to these two and then when the next motherfucker came all up at him asking some questions again he could just point them towards his associates and go back to trying to find some thing toxic to inhale in this hospital.

"Alright, brothers...this is the last motherfuckin time I'm getting at this. Both of you can't all up and remember someone and it's fuckin you up. Right?"

"Right." Dave and Karkat said together.

"That's cuz they ain't existing anymore. None of us do. This whole motherfuckin place is whatever you make it. We're replacements and it's time for us to motherfuckin get our asses out of here. There's only one way to get at that: dying. When you die ain't no one can remember you. I mean all up and except for whoever was closest to that motherfucker. But don't get all hung up on that part, brothers. It's for the motherfuckin best. I'm all helpin him and if you want to, too, you should take some motherfuckers out ASAP." Gamzee explained slowly, hoping there were no more questions.

"Okay, one:" Karkat started, "you still sound fuckin stupid. And two: are you completely out of your head? We're in a goddamned hospital not an episode of the fucking Twilight Zone."

Gamzee stood up and sighed, "Look, that's all I know, brothers. If you ain't wantin to get at the understanding then leave me the motherfuck alone. I can't bring your friends back and I'm real motherfuckin sorry about that." He turned away from them, slouching and putting his hands into his pockets. He started to walk away when he felt something cold against the back of his neck. He took a deep breath.

"Karbro, what are you all up and doing?"

"I'm _helping_." Karkat said as he pushed the blade harder against Gamzees skin. A pill of blood started to build up around the tip. "I dont fucking understand how any of this is happening...but I know you're hiding something. And if you don't fucking tell me what the hell is really going on I will---!"

Gamzee sighed as Karkat removed the knife from his neck and dropped it on the ground.

***suicide trigger warning***

"Motherfucker...you're new to this. You know how long I've been all up and getting my understand on in this place? Since I appeared here. You can't kill me. But you we're created wanting to kill yourself, brother...how about you get at that instead?"

"Karkat?" Dave asked, as Karkat dropped his weapon. Everything was happening so fast. Karkat turned around and Dave reached for his arm to stop him. When he turned him around, Karkat had something else in his hands - a rope. "Karkat? What are you - where the hell did you get-?" He let go of Karkat and turned to Gamzee. He wrapped his hands around the taller boy's neck. Gamzee paid little to no attention to him as he cussed at him, confused. His eyes were trained on what was unfolding behind Dave. Eventually, Gamzee was able to lift his arm and point behind Dave. Dave stopped and turned around, keeping his hands on Gamzee's neck. He turned just in time to see a chair tumble over and the rope tighten. "KARKAT!" Dave screamed and he immediately whipped back around to Gamzee. His hands tightened and Gamzee's face started to turn red. "YOU KILLED KARKAT!" Gamzee reached for Dave's hands and tried to pull them away.

"W-who?"

Dave turned around and there was nothing but an empty rope dangling from the ceiling. He blinked and the rope disappeared as well. His grip loosened. "He just...Kar..."

Gamzee took this opportunity to push Dave away from him. "I told you, brother. It's for his own good." Gamzee left Dave staring at the empty room. He closed Dave's room door behind him as he made his way to his own. He laid down on his bed and stared up at the ceiling for a moment before turning on his side. He stared at the empty bed across from him. Sometimes, if he focused really hard, he could see someone else laying there. He could see someone else, with brown hair shaved on the sides laying there and speaking to him, sometimes he would smile or laugh. He wanted desperately to remember his name...but it was all for his own good, right?


	18. Because I Am Dead *new 5/3/16*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone remembers.  
>  **Trigger warning:** more violence n blood

"I'm sorry fur lying..." Nepeta said quietly as she pulled her knees up to her chest.

Equius sighed, "There is no need to apologize. I am quite relieved, actually. You did not lie on purpose, correct?"

Nepeta looked down at her feet, "I mean...yeah...I knew what I was saying wasn't true...but I just wanted everyone to like me! Aradia was so cool thinking she's a ghost and Kanaya's fangs...so I just thought..."

Equius nodded, "I understand. You wanted to fit in. Sometimes it is best to stand out. Is attention not what you crave? Should you not embrace your differences?"

Nepeta nodded as she plopped her face onto her knees. What he was saying would make since if she had any differences that would really set her apart from the others. "I mean...maybe if I had something really special about me that I could take puride in, but I don't. I'm kind of boring...I just spend all day writing fanfiction and even those are not furry good."

Equius smiled, "Perhaps I could read one? I will be the judge of if they are mediocre or not."

Nepeta's little face lit up, "Would you really? You would read them and tell me all the things you like about them?"

Equius nodded as he crossed his arms, "Of course. What do you usually write about? I am unfamiliar with the term 'fanfiction.'"

Nepeta crossed her legs and put her hands in her lap, "Well my most recent one is about you and your roommate John! One night he has a nightmare and he-"

Equius' face turned beet red, "Do you mean you wrote something romantic about me and John Egbert?" Nepeta smiled excitedly and Equius coughed. ".........go on."

* * *

Eridan slowly opened his eyes, letting them adjust to the darkness. He felt around on the table next to him for his glasses and knocked them onto the floor. He sighed as he pulled his feet over the edge of the bed and stood up. He felt something crack under his feet. He sighed again as he ran a hand through his hair and shivered as his bare feet padded across the room. He placed his hands on the door knob to the bathroom when he heard a giggle. He turned to look at his roommate's bed. It seemed more occupied than usual. He walked closer before he saw a lump in the bed roll over, long black hair tangling in her hands and obscuring her face. There was another lump behind her who slid his arm over her waist and pulled her closer. The two breathed in sync, the girl giggling in her sleep occasionally.

Eridan balled up his fists. It was that girl. The one who claimed to be dead and followed Sollux around like a lost puppy because she refused to speak. He felt his blood boiling. He wanted more than anything to be in that bed with him...but Sollux wouldn't even look at him.

He felt jealousy building up within him as he slowly opened one hand, a hammer appearing in his grip. He rubbed his thumb along it and lifted it, feeling the weight as he held it above his head.

*tw graphic depiction of violence*

It crashed down, smashing against a skull, splattering blood back in Eridan's face. He pulled it back up and smacked it down again. Over and over he beat the hammer against bone and broke skin repeatedly. Finally, a screaming registered and he looked up to see the girl - Aradia - huddled against the wall and holding the blanket over her eyes. Eridan looked down to see a pair of shattered glasses drenched in blood.

"Sollux..." Aradia whispered. She watched the pool of blood disappear as she reached out for the glasses. "Not you too..."

Eridan fell to his knees, his hands on his head, the hammer gone. "He was just...he was...who was?"

Aradia pulled herself into a ball as she sobbed, "Sollux..."

Eridan stared at her, "S...ollux? Was that his name? I feel like...he was just...but I don't...remember..."

Aradia nodded and wiped at her tears, "His name was Sollux...and soon I'll be the only one who remembers him...its always me...because I'm dead, I remember him...I remember them all..."

Eridan was confused, "All? Who are you talking about?"

Aradia sighed as she dropped her gaze, "Sollux...Karkat...Terezi...Jade...Vriska...Tavros..." she spoke their names quietly, none of them ringing a bell with Eridan, "They all met the same fate...and now they're gone...and I'm all that's left to tie the memory of them to this world..."

* * *

Aradia stared at her hands fidgeting in her lap as she spoke, "I remember...others...who used to be here with us."

Gamzee perked up, listening to her closely. Dave gave him a questioning look but Gamzee paid no attention to him. "You remember...a guy with a mohawk?" He asked finally.

Aradia nodded, "That was Tavros. He was the first to leave us."

"What about a boy with like messy black hair that was perpetually pissed off?" Dave asked her and she nodded again.

"His name was Karkat. He was your roommate, Dave." Aradia turned to Rose, "You had a roommate as well. Jade. There were two other girls, Terezi and Vriska. And then today...we lost Sollux."

Equius coughed, "Excuse me, Miss Aradia, but I don't understand. How have people been dying in a place so guarded as this?"

"Someone is killing them." Dave spoke up, giving a side-long glance at Gamzee.

"But how do you even get a weapon in a purlace like this?" Nepeta questioned from beside Equius.

Gamzee sighed as he stood up and left. Dave watched him go and quickly realized he understood the most now. "Its kind of stupid." He explained, "But you can just...make shit appear. I don't fuckin' know how exactly but apparently it just happens."

Everyone was silent. Whether they were taking the new information in or just completely confused was unknown.

* * *

"You heard what Dave said." Rose said solemnly as her breath caught in her throat. "This is our only chance."

Kanaya crossed her arms, standing across from Rose in her room. "There must be a better way. This is crazy. There is no way what he said could ever be true."

"We can at least try! Please, Kanaya...they told me..." Rose dropped onto her bed, "The doctors...they said I've been cleared...I'm leaving tomorrow...I'll never see you again..."

Kanaya sat beside her, "Rose...that is untrue and you know it. We will find each other again, somehow."

"No, we won't. Kanaya...I don't live around here. Everywhere near where I live was full so I traveled to stay here..." Rose muttered.

Kanaya smiled, "That is fine. I will give you my phone number or my handle and we will talk online or through text. We can make this work, I am positive."

Rose shook her head, "No...no it won't be the same. I don't want to leave this place...we should just...just...end it." Rose felt tears welling up in her eyes as a cold, metallic feeling slowly faded into her hands. She wrapped her fingers around the handle of the gun, one curling around the trigger. She stood up, pointing the barrel straight at Kanaya.

Kanaya took in a shocked breath. "Rose! What are you - how did you-?"

Rose sniffled as she steadied the gun with her other hand. "K-Kanaya...just...please...think about it and you'll get one. And then...then we'll count to three and-and end it."

Kanaya stood up and took a step towards Rose, "Please, Rose, be reasonable. This wont fix-"

Rose pointed the gun away from Kanaya and fired the bullet into a mirror. It cracked and a piece flew out. It frightened Kanaya and she felt a weight appear in her hand. She lifted her hand to find a small pistol. She dropped it immediately. "Rose, NO!"

Rose pointed the gun back at Kanaya. With tears in her eyes, Kanaya picked up her gun and shakily lifted it towards Rose. The two stood in silence for a long time before two gun shots rung out throughout the hospital.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And another one bites the dust (of non existence)


	19. Ghost Girl *new 5/10/16*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feferi and Eridan explore, Aradia talks about past patients, John and Dave do some research, and Equius and Gamzee have some alone time.  
> *** **Trigger warning:** Lots of violence in this chapter***

"I just don't see why the others made such a big deal about this place." Eridan said as he lifted a statue of a face. He turned it over in his hands before replacing it back on one of the many pedestals that lined the hallway.

Feferi shrugged, "Dunno, kinda neat thought!" She stared up at one of the dozens of paintings on one of the walls. The red and green theme reminded her of Christmas and she vaguely wondered how close it was to the holiday season. She was about to voice her question when she heard a noise. Footsteps. They were coming from one of the other branching off hallways.

Feferi started to panic. "Eridan!" She called as she grabbed at him. He had just reached for another stone head as she pulled him away and it crashed to the floor. The footsteps picked up pace and Feferi started pulling Eridan into the hall. They made it to the staircase and Eridan started down first. Feferi looked back over her shoulder just long enough to see someone appear from around the corner. She saw a short boy with a shaved head, and the look on his face implied he wasn't very happy with either of them being there.

Feferi turned back to Eridan, placing her hands on his shoulder blades, "Hurry, hurry!" She cried as she urged him on, giving his shoulders a push. The boy in the hall inched closer, his fists balling up,. Eridan turned to look back at whatever was upsetting Feferi just as she gave him yet another push.

Eridan's foot slipped off the step. His other foot followed it as he grasped for one of the railings. He missed and he fell butt-first onto the stair. His head smacked down behind him. Feferi reached out for him but he had already started his flailing decent of the spiral between the floors.

Eridan flopped and smacked around all the way to the first landing on the second floor. Feferi chased him down but when she got there all that was left was a single pair of glasses. She picked them u and looked around.  _Where am I?_ She asked herself before realizing she was on the floor with their rooms. 'Why' was a whole other story. And who's glasses were these? Her mind was blank so she dropped them and headed back down to the day room.

* * *

 

"That's so cool!" Nepeta purred, "She could smell how you felt? And she was  _my_ best furriend?"

Aradia nodded, "Yes. She could do various things with her senses. Her emotions, however, she had very little control over."

Nepeta mewled over the thought in her head. "What kinds of things did we do together?"

"As far as I know, you 'roleplayed' quite a bit. You occasionally bickered about Karkat." Aradia added and Nepeta pursed her lips.

"Karkat? I don't even slightly remember him."

Aradia nodded. "That must mean it was only a crush. Most are only remembered by those who had genuine feelings for them. So, do you think you would remember Equius?"

Nepeta shuffled uncomfortably, "I-I don't know what you mean..."

"I'm asking if your feelings are serious."

"Well, yes - yes they are! But...remembering him...that would mean someone killing him..."

Aradia looked away, "Of course someone could kill you first, perhaps he will be the one remembering you?"

"Aradia...I don't understand...why do people need to die anyway?" Nepeta replied as she wrung her hands together. She felt tears welling in her eyes. "I-I don't want anyone else to die..."

As if he had sensed Nepeta was upset, Equius walked behind the couch they sat upon in the day room. "What is going on here?" He asked before noticing Nepeta's red eyes. "Are you okay?"

Nepeta sniffled. "She-she said one of us is going to die."

Equius turned to Aradia, "Aradia - cease talking about our apparent inevitable deaths."

"Equius!" Nepeta pleaded, "Don't agree with her! We-we aren't going to die..."

Aradia shook her head, "Nine of us already have. And I suspect so will the last seven of us." She looked away as she felt another presence by the couch and a messy frock of black hair plopped down beside her. "Correct, Gamzee?"

"Eight left, actually, motherfucker." Gamzee said with a smirk and Aradia started counting in her head confusedly. "But no, yeah, she's all going at this the right way, brother. You're both gonna die. We all up and are."

Equius rounded the couch, snatching Gamzee by the shirt collar and yanking him up. "Listen here, clown, you think you know something we don't? You think I wasn't aware something is wrong here?" He shook him a couple times as he shoved a finger into his face. "I've seen the news paper clippings. I know about the fire and I know my dad was in it. I don't get it completely but I know enough to understand there's no need for all this senseless death and mystery and...and...horseshit!"

Equius felt someone tug on his shirt and he looked down to see Nepeta's wet eyes staring up at him. "Please..." She begged, "just calm down."

Equius breathed in though his mouth and out through his nose as he counted, just like his therapist had taught him. He only got to about six before a fist connected with his jaw. He dropped Gamzee as he moved his hand to his face. It only took a moment before he threw his own punch, knocking Gamzee back onto the couch. Aradia and Nepeta both stood up and stared in shock as the two boys pummeled one another. It only lasted a few seconds before the nurses swarmed and broke them apart. They carried them down the hall and into solitary. Once placed in the rooms, Equius began punching walls. Not enough to make a hole, but enough to bloody a few knuckles. He only stopped when he heard laughter from another room.

"What the heck is so funny?" Equius called as he looked out the tiny window on the locked door.

Gamzee's laughter continued for a couple more minutes before he answered. "It's just real motherfucking amusing that you all up and think we can all loose everyone to us, but you and your girl...you think you're different, brother?" He snickered again, "With the way things are going here, you'll be the one to do her in, motherfucker."

* * *

 

"So like, you guys cant tel us anything?" John asked as he leaned against the nurse's desk.

One of the pool-themed nurses shook his head, "We're not allowed to discuss that subject. Orders from the directors."

Dave scoffed and mumbled something about 'the man.' The two boys stood up and and spoke quietly for a moment before turning back to them. "Can we go to the library?"

The nurses looked back and forth at each other before one stood up. He looked around for the girls who had invested themselves in a game of Go Fish. He asked if they also wanted to go to the library. "No thanks!" Feferi cheered, "I'm winning!" She exclaimed as she laid down four 8's.

The nurse shrugged and led John and Dave through the hall and into the library. He sat down at a desk and picked up a newspaper. John and Dave set search among the book for anything relating to the hospital's history. They dug and dug, slowly loosing hope until John found a small, leather-bound book peaking out from behind a shelf.

John picked it up and realized it was a diary. "Hey Dave! Check this out!" Dave found the a small desk and they pulled up two chairs. The first page had the same year as the old newspaper from upstairs. They turned to the first page and found a list of names. Each name had a disorder listed across from it.

They read over the list until Dave stopped and pointed at one of them. "Strider. Dirk Strider." He said thoughtfully. "That hs to be him, my brother."

John nodded as he kept reading, but he didn't see any Egberts. "I don't see my dad on here..."

Dave thought for a moment before speaking, "Hey wait, I thought when we looked at that picture it was, like, some chick you recognized?"

"Oh right! My nanna...her name was...June?"

"Jane." Dave corrected as he pointed at her name. "Jane Crocker."

John read over it a few times before turning the page, but Dave tugged it back to the list. "Wait a second," he said, dragging his finger down the list of disorders, "everything they had, one of us had it too. I mean, that is if Ghost Girl is telling the truth about remembering the others so well."

They read in silence before John pointed at a name, "You're right. Look, Horrus had AVPD, like me. And Roxy had my anxiety. Mituna was schizophrenic like you. It's all the same, just mixed around."

Dave nodded as he grabbed two other books and sandwiched the diary between theme. They let the nurse know they would like to go back to the unit. Once they returned, they gathered everyone under the guise of a board game. As they took their turns, they passed the book around, each of them finding their own parent or guardian and sure enough discovering someone they had something very personal in common. 

It was all going smoothly until it was Equius' turn. He read his father's name at least a dozen times in silence. His face started to turn red and there was a vein popping out on his forehead. He stood up abruptly, pushing the table as he did so, effectively knocking the board game with it.

He strode over to John and grabbed him by the shirt collar. "Where did you get this?" he opened the book and pointed at a passage where the writer described a boy named Horrus and how he had come to be in the hospital.

John barely read two words before Equius punched him square in the nose. John struggled for freedom as Equius wrapped his hands around John's neck. All Equius could see was red. Nepeta stood up and pulled on his arms to stop him. Without a second thought he flung her away. She fell against the edge of a table, her head splitting open and blood began to poor out.

Equius' attention was quickly back on John. With one swift motion, he snapped his head to the side with a satisfying crack. He dropped John's lifeless body to the floor and slowly relaxed his fingers, then his arms and legs, and slowly his whole body. Once he had regained control of himself, he looked around everyone else, staring at him, awestruck.

* * *

Aradia sat on her bed with her legs folded beneath her. She sighed as she pulled a pad of paper out from under mattress. She read over a list of names, quickly dwindling in size. She marked through three of the remaining names and sat in silence.

Then, she nodded. She whispered a yes. Another nod. "I understand..." She spoke quietly to no one. "I know you are worried. It will be over soon." She nodded a couple more times. "I promise. It will end soon, even if I have to things into my own hands."

* * *

 

Dave laid on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He felt like he should be tossing up a baseball and catching it in an old, tattered mitt. He felt a presence by his feet and looked down to see Lil Cal climbing his way onto the bed.

"You remember him now?" Lil Cal asked, his voice sickeningly sweet.

"My Bro? Yeah, kind of..." Dave thought for a moment, "I can't imagine his face but who he was..." He scooted closer to the wall as Lil Cal wobbled further up the bed and dropped beside him. "I really want to say he was cool. That we got along and he cared about me. But the truth is, that doesn't sit right."

Lil Cal snickered, "You're right, Dave. He was a terrible brother and an even worse guardian."

Dave nodded, "I guessed." He sat in silence beside Lil Cal for a few moments before his door creaked open. He looked up to see one of the girls. Her long, curly, burgundy hair hung down to her waist. She stood  in the door way a moment before taking a step in.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop..." She said easily as she took another step in. Dave sat up now, ignoring Cal. "You were talking about your brother. He was here, some time ago, but I didn't meet him. He has spoken to me."

"What did he say" Dave asked quietly as she moved to sit beside him.

"Not much of importance. Although someone else misses you greatly." Aradia added and Dave perked up a bit.

"Who?"

"John."

Dave froze for a moment.  _John..._ For a moment he could almost  _see_ the boy's ridiculous buck teeth. "What was he like?"

Aradia smiled lightly, "Silly, mostly. I didn't know him very well. You were the closest to him. You were probably in love."

Dave felt his cheeks grow warm and redness spread across his face, over his freckles and tinting his ears. He wished more than anything he could remember him. At the same time, although, it meant he didn't have to grieve over his apparent death. He felt so conflicted.

"You know..." Aradia spoke quietly as she folded her hands in her lap. "You may be able to see him again."

Dave looked up, "Really? How...?"

Aradia's sweet smile slowly gave way to a sinister smirk. She lifted her arm and extended it toward's Dave. He watched her suspiciously. "Let's see if this works..." She whispered as she focused on Dave. His chest tightened and he was in so much pain. He could almost see his heart beating. Finally, he let out a scream as Aradia closed her hand into a fist and Dave way to the heart attack.

* * *

"What the heck do you mean you don't remember!?" Equius yelled.

Gamzee smiled, "Exactly what I up and said, motherfucker."

Equius took a step forward, cornering Gamzee in is his own room. "You don't remember telling me and, and, - SHOOT what is her name... - that one of us was going to die? And now she's gone...it had to be you!"

Gamzee shook his head, "No, I don't get at remembering nothing like that." He smirked, "but I'd be lying if I didn't say it sounds like something a motherfucker like me would say."

As soon as the last word fell from his lips, Equius grabbed Gamzee around the throat. He threw him to the ground and settled on top of him. He tangled his fingers in his messy hair and lifted his head up before slamming it into the ground again and again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have bad news and good news!  
> Bad news: I had to go back to the hospital :-/  
> Good news: During my stay, I wrote the last two chapters (including this one) as well as a FAQ to explain anything i didnt make clear enough in the story or for people that have trouble with reading comprehension/piecing parts together. The rest of the story is on paper so Im having to type it all up which is the only thing that will keep me from posting it all at once. So, as long as i didnt over/underestimate how long certain chapters would be, chapter 21 should be the FAQ and the last installment!


	20. Who Are You? *new 5/10/16*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who's left? They all have to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINAL CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!! :'D  
> *towards the end could possibly trigger dissociation, derealization, or depersonalization*

Aradia's plan for Dave had worked perfectly, and now she was prepared to use the same tactic again. Lure them in with information so they trust her, make a promise and then- but it wasn't working the same way this time. She had explained Eridan to the best of her ability but Feferi felt nothing.

Aradia clearly remembered Feferi had called Eridan her boyfriend and yet, nothing. "Do you...remember anyone else?" She asked, testing the waters. She really didn't want to hurt anyone unnecessarily. Dave had left believing he would see John - and hey, maybe he would.

Aradia worried if Feferi had never had feelings for Eridan, she may have been close to no one and she would need a new plan to get close to her, but Feferi took the bait.

"A lisp!" Feferi exclaimed, "I remember a boy with a cute little lisp!"

Aradia's breath caught in her throat. "What else?"

Feferi smiled, "He was so smart! And, uh...bees, maybe?" She shrugged.

"Sollux."

"Yes!"

Aradia took a deep breath, "How...how did you feel about him?"

Feferi thought for a moment, "I liked him! Dunno how much exactly.  


Aradia knew she was lying. She must have been completely infatuated otherwise she would have no memory of him. She gritted her teeth but knew this would have to work. "What if I said you could see him again?"

Feferi hummed to herself for a moment, "You mean like his ghost?"

"Yes." Aradia replied, "Because I am dead I can see and hear the others who have left us. And if you like...I can share that power with you."

Feferi stood up and backed away from her bed. "You...you're gonna kill me!"She screamed as she took off out the room but Aradia was hot on her tail. She held her hand out and waited for the cold metal of a gun to touch her palm.

When it did, Aradia pointed it and took a shot but Feferi dodged it and started down the stairs. Aradia stood at the top and fired down below until she hit the other girl. Feferi fell but was still moving and Aradia unloaded the rest of the clip into her. She took a few calming breaths as the gun and Feferi both faded into nonexistence.

* * *

 

"I'm going to kill you!" Equius screamed over and over as he repeatedly bashed Gamzee's head into the ground. Occasionally he'd take a break, instead punching the boy in his face, bloodying his nose and busting his lips. He had just switched back to the floor-slamming-shtick when the door opened.

Equius looked up, expecting a nurse but instead he saw the only other patient, Aradia. He ignored her and continued pounding away at the face of the boy neath him. Aradia took in what was happening and quickly held up her hands. She closed her eyes and focused.

_If you can think it, motherfucker, anything can happen here._

A moment later, Equius froze, completely stiff. Aradia ran forward and yanked Gamzee out from beneath him. Equius stayed still as Aradia propped Gamzee's head on her lap. She wiped at the blood on his face and slowly he came to.

"Gamzee!" Aradia pleaded, "He's the last one!" Gamzee blinked a few times before taking a glance at Equius. "I froze him." She explained and Gamzee nodded as he pulled himself up. Without even thinking about it, he had a knife in his hand and plunged it deep into Equius' chest.

Aradia sighed as she sat next to Gamzee on his bed. She reached into the pocket of her skirt and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She stared at the list of names as she crossed off Equius. There were only two names left: Gamzee's and her own.

Silence filled the air, the only disturbance was Aradia and Gamzee's breathing. That, and the slowly vanishing corpse of their friend they just murdered. They watched until he had completely left them. Totally alone now, the quiet is finally broken by Aradia. "So what do we do now?"

Gamzee didn't miss a beat, "There's one more motherfucker other than us that needs to be taken care of."

Aradia thought for a moment, "Who?"

"And that's why I gotta be the one to all up and take her out."

Silence fell again as Aradia understood what he meant. He had to do this alone. She took pride in helping him but realized it was her time to go. "Can I..." she started quietly, "Can I go quickly at least?" She held out her hand and a small pistol rested on her palm.

Gamzee nodded as he took it. He held it up to Aradia's head and didn't hesitate to pull the trigger. Blood splattered back at him as she tipped over onto the bed. She lay there a moment, blood pooling onto Gamzee's bed.

Slowly, Aradia faded,  then her blood followed, and she left nothing behind but a piece of a paper folded once then twice. Gamzee opened the paper to see what appeared to be a list of names. They had all been scratched out except two. His own, and one other. He found a pen and marked out the unfamiliar name before scribbling one more name at the end.

* * *

 

Gamzee's arms hung at his sides lazily as he climbed the stairs. He clutched a bag in one hand. When he reached the third floor, the door was locked. Without sitting down the bag, he kicked the door open enough to reach his hand in and unlock it.

Once in the hallway, he outstretched one arm and let his fingers gently glide across the wall, When he reached a statue, he didn't flinch as he knocked it off its stand and it shattered on the floor. He followed the corners until he came to a split. For a moment, he considered breaking some of the items on the cabinet beside the chair. He decided against it and took a sharp right turn.

Eventually, he reached a door. It too was locked. He used the same maneuver to get inside as he did on the last door. He took in the room. Big, mostly empty, and dusty. He found the closet and peaked inside his bag. A couple glasses, a cane, and some other moments he had found and guessed were previous patients belongings.

He didn't remember them, but he knew he was responsible for their deaths.

He sat the bag down in the closet, atop the wheelchair. Then, he left and went back down the hallway. He passed the corridor that went back to the stairs, continuing into the left wing of the floor. 

He went into the only other room, which was set up like a large office. Empty. He took a seat at the desk and spun in the chair a couple times. He propped his feet up on the surface and began opening drawers. Most were empty, although one contained a "how to draw manga" book.

Gamzee shut the drawer and stood up. He shoved his hands in his pockets as he meandered towards the photographs on one wall. Sixteen hung there, but all but one was scratched out so the faces were unrecognizable. Across the room, sixteen more picture frames mirrored the first set. Fifteen of them had shattered glass on the front. The only two pictures unharmed were a picture of himself, and a picture of his father.

Gamzee stared at the pictures for a few more moments before he heard the door slowly creak open. He looked up to see a boy. His shaved head bounced off light in a kind of humorous manner, but the gleam in his eyes showed he was no joke.

"Gamzee." The boy said, harshly.

"I ain't all interested in chatting it up with you today, brother."  
The boy scoffed, "Then what the fuck do you want?"

"I'm looking for some other motherfucker, Caliborn."

"Too fucking bad."

Gamzee and Caliborn were both quiet for a few extended moments. Caliborn tapped his foot aggressively. "What the fuck are you doing!?" He yelled.

Gamzee shrugged, "Waiting."

Another hush fell over the two, only lasting a few minutes before Caliborn grew angry again. "This is fucking great! Goddamned SUPERB! The fucking clown has made his bed in my office. Am I you're maid now? Would you like some water with a FUCKING lemon wedge-!" Caliborn was cut off by hands wrapping around his throat. He held onto his wrists as Gamzee lifted him off the floor. Caliborn kicked his legs and tried to scream but it was no use. Then, Gamzee whispered in his ear, "Who are you?"

Caliborn kicked harder as he tried to convey his confusion. Slowly, his face started to turn blue and he could feel himself loosing consciousness. As he faded out, his screams became higher, his pitch changing. He felt his face soften and it almost felt like he shrunk a couple inches.

"Who are you!?" Gamzee repeated, loosening his grip.

"C-Calliope-!"

"Finally."

Gamzee tightened his grip again and she struggled just as her counterpart did before her. Gamzee heard people storm the room and looked over his shoulder at at least three nurses. He was stronger, though, and easily pushed them away, all while Calliope tried her best to fight as well. It was all to no avail as all life slowly slipped away from her eyes.

Gamzee dropped her body, the dull thud it made against the carpet seeming a mere echo as each of the nurses collapsed as well. Within seconds, the nurses bodies disappeared, but Calliope stayed.

Gamzee watched her, his eyes trained for any movement. Eventually groaned and pulled herself back upright. "Caliborn." Gamzee said, more a statement than a question.

Caliborn nodded. "What the hell have you done!?" He croaked out, his hand around his throat.

"Saving you." Gamzee answered easily as he lifted a gun to his own head and quickly pulled the trigger.

* * *

 

Caliborn's eyes slowly opened. Immediately, his senses were flooded. The bright, florescent light above him stung his eyes and his wrists were sore. He tried to sit up, but his arms were strapped down.

He pulled at them and then his legs. Eventually, he resorted to yelling. He shouted and screamed and, after a few moments, someone opened the door of his room.

A tall man in a fedora entered. He pulled a pipe from his mouth and let a small cloud of smoke billow out from behind it. "Ah, Caliborn," he said, "Good to see you have woken up. How are you feeling?"

Caliborn tried to speak but couldn't find the right words. "Fuck you!" he shouted instead.

The man shook his head, "I understand,\\. It will take some adjusting. You'll learn to exist all as one."

"What!?" Caliborn finally managed to sputter out.

"The integration, Caliborn. It was a success."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp thats it guys! Thank you so much for sticking with me! Please read the FAQ in the following chapter for more information if youre still lost or have any questions about things I didn't make clear enough in the story!


	21. Story FAQ *new 5/10/16*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Do not read this until you have read all previous chapters!!!**

Phew! You wouldn't believe me if I said I wrote these last chapters in a fucking hospital, would you? lol

But hey, anyway, this is just a lil preemptive FAQ to explain anything you didn't get or I didn't make clear enough!

Q: So, Caliborn imagined them all?  
A: Nope! They were his alters because he has DID, Calliope was his alter as well.

Q: Why did they die?  
A: Its a metaphor for my fears going through treatment for DID that my alters will be killed and disappear and I won't remember them anymore

Q: So thats why no one remembered them? Why did their significant other remember them?  
A: Yep thats why! and purely for angsty, shippy reasons lmao

Q: Why did they share disorders with their parents?  
A: After the fire killed them (the alpha kids and beforus trolls) Caliborn created alters to replace them to deal with the trauma

Q: They all died in the fire then! So why did the newspaper say otherwise?  
A: Because the newspaper was part of the headspace, purely to make it more real in his mind that they never died

Q: Headspace?  
A: Thats a term for people with systems/alters/DID-DDNOS. Its where our alters live and exist when they aren't fronting. A place in our heads.

Q: So what about the whole magical weapons appear out of no where business?  
A: Headspace shenanigans! Anything can happen in there.

Q: Integration?  
A: Its a common treatment for DID where the alters are all smooshed together into one "personality"

Q: Whats Gamzee's deal? Why did he know so much?  
A: He was a sort of medium between the doctors attempts at therapy and Caliborn who was trapped in his headspace.

Q: Why could Aradia remember everyone?  
A: Idk shes a spooky ghost?

Q: So the hospital they talked about creating in the prologue, Cherub Institute, thats just their headspace?  
A: Yup!

Q:Are we gonna read more about what happened in the real hospital to the parents?  
A: Its possible! I've never written any of them and don't have a solid grasp of the characterization of the Beforeus trolls.

 **Q: Alright, I read this far and I still don't get why all the disorders are so stereotypical.**  
A: The million dollar question. Alright, hear me out. Their parents had the disorders, not Caliborn. So, when he internalized those disorders into his alters, he couldn't possibly accurately portray them. All he knows is the things he's seen, read, or watched and there should be no argument that Caliborn is not exactly researcher material.

Just to be safe, heres a short rundown of the timeline: Caliborn splits into Calliope early on, he is sent to a hospital, hospital burns down and hes the only survivor, hes traumatized so he splits a bunch more, creating alters to remind him of the friends he lost, he internalizes their disorders as well, Gamzee starts to "cure" him by forcing integration and killing off each alter, Caliborn wakes up alone without any of his system

Any other questions are welcome in the comments! If you want to argue please address your concerns to: fuck_off@getalife.com

And finally, thank you all so much for sticking with this story for like three goddamned years after my depressed ass decided to quit writing for a long time.


End file.
